Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
27 Years, 354 Days and 77338 Haiku later...

Get beyond I say
That is my advice to you
Send me a postcard
Haiku # 1852, August 22, 1999 10:02 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
My subversive heart
Is thousands of feet in height
Get me a doctor
Haiku # 1851, August 22, 1999 9:59 pm ET
by Dr Ernest Unity
I''ve returned to say
I can break boards with my cock
Egads-a splinter!
Haiku # 1850, August 22, 1999 9:52 pm ET
by Dr. Ernest Unity
one two three four five
six seven eight nine and ten
eleven and twelve
Haiku # 1849, August 22, 1999 7:52 pm ET
by kaRa leah of dallas,
I learned something new
my gramps fell asleep smoking
beards are flammable
Haiku # 1848, August 22, 1999 2:32 pm ET
by manic bartender
ha ha you drunk ass
fell asleep with your head in
the toilet again
Haiku # 1847, August 22, 1999 2:16 pm ET
by manic bartender
I touched a moonbeam
I found in the morning dew
It smelled real funny
Haiku # 1846, August 22, 1999 1:22 pm ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
I left chocolate
On the microwave oven
And it all melted
Haiku # 1845, August 22, 1999 1:20 pm ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
Little lights twinkle
Like the lights of aeroplanes
Landing at Heathrow
Haiku # 1844, August 22, 1999 1:19 pm ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
It''s on nights like this
That I like to wear my pants
And that''s about it
Haiku # 1843, August 22, 1999 1:17 pm ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
bust yo fool head in
you diss my ma, you steppin?
I pump the lead in
Haiku # 1842, August 22, 1999 1:08 pm ET
by ghetto
my brother got sick
he ate green olives. they were
supposed to be black
Haiku # 1841, August 22, 1999 1:05 pm ET
by manic bartender
can anybody
understand the singer from
deftones? hell, not me!
Haiku # 1840, August 22, 1999 1:02 pm ET
by manic bartender
I did it again
clicked ''enter'' way too early
give me some money
Haiku # 1839, August 22, 1999 12:56 pm ET
by manic bartender
Haiku # 1838, August 22, 1999 12:55 pm ET
by manic bartender
I''m scared to think it -
My father comes tomorrow with
his wife. Don''t like me.
Haiku # 1837, August 21, 1999 10:12 pm ET
by Sherri Reid of Bellevue, USA
Open mouthed Plastic fish eyes silently stare atme unnervingly
Haiku # 1836, August 21, 1999 10:07 pm ET
by Sherri Reid of Bellevue, USA
Light purple flowers
decompose on top
my gravebelow cries sad tears
Haiku # 1835, August 21, 1999 10:05 pm ET
by Sherri Reid of Bellevue, USA
I''m sad now. They went
out without me because I
had to work. Life sucks.
Haiku # 1834, August 21, 1999 10:02 pm ET
by Sherri Reid of Bellevue, USA
I sit at work, staring
at my big computer screen
no one needs me now
Haiku # 1833, August 21, 1999 10:00 pm ET
by Sherri Reid of Bellevue, USa
The little bird chirps,
She falls out of her small nest,
She is not quite right.
Haiku # 1832, August 21, 1999 9:47 pm ET
by Amanda
answer the riddle:
I met jenny, broke her neck
and I drank her dry
Haiku # 1831, August 21, 1999 9:33 pm ET
by manic bartender
dammit, clicked send fast
sent a big slice of nothing.
here: useless last line
Haiku # 1830, August 21, 1999 9:27 pm ET
by manic bartender
Haiku # 1829, August 21, 1999 9:24 pm ET
by manic bartender
Lisa G and Lynn
Monica likes them also
It''s Tarzan''s play things
Haiku # 1828, August 21, 1999 7:10 pm ET
by Nac Bee the Crane Boy
Don`t know what I want
And don''t know where to get it
Which is damned awkward
Haiku # 1827, August 21, 1999 8:50 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
Miniature tripod
Standing on my desk like a
Small thing with three legs
Haiku # 1826, August 21, 1999 8:48 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
Silicone sealant
Trodden into the carpet
Now it`s waterprrof
Haiku # 1825, August 21, 1999 8:48 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
Will a tree ever
Grow tall enough to reach space?
Hm, I don`t think so
Haiku # 1824, August 21, 1999 6:25 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
Will a tree ever
Grow tall enough to reach space?
Hm, I don
Haiku # 1823, August 21, 1999 6:25 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
Sunlight filtering
Through the forest canopy
Sounds like butterflies
Haiku # 1822, August 21, 1999 6:24 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
No fresh fruit for days
But plenty of fresh pizza
So no problems there
Haiku # 1821, August 21, 1999 6:22 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
Cords from dressing gowns
Autoasphyxiation
Makes you think, don`t it?
Haiku # 1820, August 21, 1999 6:20 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
I work for Alcan
My plans are forever foiled
Even when they''re not
Haiku # 1819, August 21, 1999 6:19 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
I''ve been smearing oil
Over all my surfaces
It''s theraputic
Haiku # 1818, August 21, 1999 6:14 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
screaming, burning hair
in my mind''s eye they''re naked
Haiku # 1817, August 20, 1999 2:01 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
You! Scratching your arse
by the photobooth. One day,
son, your prints will come.
Haiku # 1816, August 20, 1999 8:04 am ET
by Scrunty Hardbody
Who`s that private dick?
Sex machine to all the chicks.
Yep. It`s my grandpa.
Haiku # 1815, August 20, 1999 7:59 am ET
by Scrunty Hardbody
Dot co dot uk,
Dot net dot org dot
They''re all made of pants.
Haiku # 1814, August 20, 1999 7:56 am ET
by Scrunty Hardbody
Afternoons like this
are for procrastinating.
Pass the Vaseline.
Haiku # 1813, August 20, 1999 6:30 am ET
by Scrunty Hardbody
Sky-blue candy floss.
Whoever heard of such things?
I must get out more.
Haiku # 1812, August 20, 1999 6:28 am ET
by Scrunty Hardbody
Will I ne`er be free?
No no, Mr Bluebottle,
windows are like that.
Haiku # 1811, August 20, 1999 6:26 am ET
by Scrunty Hardbody
Answering machines
always foiling all my plans.
Blip blip blip blip beeeeeeep
Haiku # 1810, August 20, 1999 6:21 am ET
by Scrunty Hardbody
pyromaniacs
engaging in backburning
bushfires on the hill
Haiku # 1809, August 20, 1999 5:58 am ET
by ash
I drank the ocean
Now I''m bigger than Brando
I need some more room
Haiku # 1808, August 20, 1999 2:52 am ET
by Dr Ernest Unity
What is the reason
For you my funky werewolf
Have I gone too far?
Haiku # 1807, August 20, 1999 2:47 am ET
by Dr Ernest Unity
bugs and teen-agers,
an annoying symmetry.
bazookas for sure.
Haiku # 1806, August 19, 1999 9:45 pm ET
by chris
big roaches that clank
lumber through my apartment
i need bazookas
Haiku # 1805, August 19, 1999 9:43 pm ET
by chris
teen-agers annoy
me and rap makes no sense at all
i''ve become my dad
Haiku # 1804, August 19, 1999 9:37 pm ET
by chris
recycled passion
dreamer''s dreams left to the way side
still searching for pearls
Haiku # 1803, August 19, 1999 6:11 pm ET
by Raz
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