Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
27 Years, 354 Days and 77338 Haiku later...

The little bird chirps,
She falls out of her small nest,
She is not quite right.
Haiku # 1832, August 21, 1999 9:47 pm ET
by Amanda
answer the riddle:
I met jenny, broke her neck
and I drank her dry
Haiku # 1831, August 21, 1999 9:33 pm ET
by manic bartender
dammit, clicked send fast
sent a big slice of nothing.
here: useless last line
Haiku # 1830, August 21, 1999 9:27 pm ET
by manic bartender
Haiku # 1829, August 21, 1999 9:24 pm ET
by manic bartender
Lisa G and Lynn
Monica likes them also
It''s Tarzan''s play things
Haiku # 1828, August 21, 1999 7:10 pm ET
by Nac Bee the Crane Boy
Don`t know what I want
And don''t know where to get it
Which is damned awkward
Haiku # 1827, August 21, 1999 8:50 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
Miniature tripod
Standing on my desk like a
Small thing with three legs
Haiku # 1826, August 21, 1999 8:48 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
Silicone sealant
Trodden into the carpet
Now it`s waterprrof
Haiku # 1825, August 21, 1999 8:48 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
Will a tree ever
Grow tall enough to reach space?
Hm, I don`t think so
Haiku # 1824, August 21, 1999 6:25 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
Will a tree ever
Grow tall enough to reach space?
Hm, I don
Haiku # 1823, August 21, 1999 6:25 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
Sunlight filtering
Through the forest canopy
Sounds like butterflies
Haiku # 1822, August 21, 1999 6:24 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
No fresh fruit for days
But plenty of fresh pizza
So no problems there
Haiku # 1821, August 21, 1999 6:22 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
Cords from dressing gowns
Autoasphyxiation
Makes you think, don`t it?
Haiku # 1820, August 21, 1999 6:20 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
I work for Alcan
My plans are forever foiled
Even when they''re not
Haiku # 1819, August 21, 1999 6:19 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
I''ve been smearing oil
Over all my surfaces
It''s theraputic
Haiku # 1818, August 21, 1999 6:14 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
screaming, burning hair
in my mind''s eye they''re naked
Haiku # 1817, August 20, 1999 2:01 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
You! Scratching your arse
by the photobooth. One day,
son, your prints will come.
Haiku # 1816, August 20, 1999 8:04 am ET
by Scrunty Hardbody
Who`s that private dick?
Sex machine to all the chicks.
Yep. It`s my grandpa.
Haiku # 1815, August 20, 1999 7:59 am ET
by Scrunty Hardbody
Dot co dot uk,
Dot net dot org dot
They''re all made of pants.
Haiku # 1814, August 20, 1999 7:56 am ET
by Scrunty Hardbody
Afternoons like this
are for procrastinating.
Pass the Vaseline.
Haiku # 1813, August 20, 1999 6:30 am ET
by Scrunty Hardbody
Sky-blue candy floss.
Whoever heard of such things?
I must get out more.
Haiku # 1812, August 20, 1999 6:28 am ET
by Scrunty Hardbody
Will I ne`er be free?
No no, Mr Bluebottle,
windows are like that.
Haiku # 1811, August 20, 1999 6:26 am ET
by Scrunty Hardbody
Answering machines
always foiling all my plans.
Blip blip blip blip beeeeeeep
Haiku # 1810, August 20, 1999 6:21 am ET
by Scrunty Hardbody
pyromaniacs
engaging in backburning
bushfires on the hill
Haiku # 1809, August 20, 1999 5:58 am ET
by ash
I drank the ocean
Now I''m bigger than Brando
I need some more room
Haiku # 1808, August 20, 1999 2:52 am ET
by Dr Ernest Unity
What is the reason
For you my funky werewolf
Have I gone too far?
Haiku # 1807, August 20, 1999 2:47 am ET
by Dr Ernest Unity
bugs and teen-agers,
an annoying symmetry.
bazookas for sure.
Haiku # 1806, August 19, 1999 9:45 pm ET
by chris
big roaches that clank
lumber through my apartment
i need bazookas
Haiku # 1805, August 19, 1999 9:43 pm ET
by chris
teen-agers annoy
me and rap makes no sense at all
i''ve become my dad
Haiku # 1804, August 19, 1999 9:37 pm ET
by chris
recycled passion
dreamer''s dreams left to the way side
still searching for pearls
Haiku # 1803, August 19, 1999 6:11 pm ET
by Raz
you boasting buffoon
stop talking math or i''ll scream
boring is not smart
Haiku # 1802, August 19, 1999 3:39 pm ET
by kkk colonic
you boasting buffoon
stop talking math or i''ll scream
boring is not smart
Haiku # 1801, August 19, 1999 3:38 pm ET
by kkk colonic
he bought me dinner
i drank too much jack daniels
he did not kiss me
Haiku # 1800, August 19, 1999 11:12 am ET
by whoops
I often wonder
About things that tickle bees
Like freshly mown grass
Haiku # 1799, August 19, 1999 8:56 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
I poured cold Snapple
Into my PC, killing
The computer elf
Haiku # 1798, August 19, 1999 8:54 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
For such a small word
It`s incredible how sex
Can be so much fun
Haiku # 1797, August 19, 1999 8:52 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
Whole roasted peanuts
Wrapped in a crispy coating
Mmm technology
Haiku # 1796, August 19, 1999 8:49 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
Four electric geese
Stand and honk in my garden
When they`re fully charged
Haiku # 1795, August 19, 1999 8:48 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
My singing stingray
Stings and sings for everything
Just like an angel
Haiku # 1794, August 19, 1999 7:44 am ET
by Dr Ernest Unity of Jupiter's Red Spot,
On display for me
A girl so lovely and fair
I say does she bite?
Haiku # 1793, August 19, 1999 7:33 am ET
by Dr Ernest Unity
You recognize me
By my torrid expression
And swoon from passion
Haiku # 1792, August 19, 1999 7:27 am ET
by Dr. Ernest Unity
All my silly popes
Are lining up to greet you
Please enjoy them all
Haiku # 1791, August 19, 1999 7:23 am ET
by Doc Unity
Dr. Sam Beckett.
I wonder if he misses
his own genitals.
Haiku # 1790, August 19, 1999 3:08 am ET
by Hunty Scarredbody
You see, there''s this thing
I keep it in a small box
More smallish, really
Haiku # 1789, August 19, 1999 1:48 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
If everybody
Wore armour instead of pants
We could kick at will
Haiku # 1788, August 19, 1999 1:45 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
Was Joan of Arc''s arc
Really an arc or simply
Just a curvy thing?
Haiku # 1787, August 19, 1999 1:44 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
Now to end the show
America shoots itself
We get off on it
Haiku # 1786, August 18, 1999 10:36 pm ET
by Dr. Ernest Unity
Te setzu duh hru?
Eedsuni kungata ho-
`ertutu Nabla!
Haiku # 1785, August 18, 1999 10:25 pm ET
by Dr. Ernest Unity
The day will soon come
when gnomes will rule us all
So just let it ride
Haiku # 1784, August 18, 1999 10:22 pm ET
by Dr. Ernest Unity
Oh I am so deep
Oh I bring up lofty things
only when I drink
Haiku # 1783, August 18, 1999 10:16 pm ET
by Dr. Ernest Unity
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