scotsmen wear kilts for
the whistle, of wind round their
bollocks and gristle

another woman
ordered double entendre
and got two for one

triple entendre?

garage sale broken
circuit breakers...an offer
that can't be refused???

triple entendres ?
try this on for sighs..'Mary
had a little lamb'..

did she own a sheep? eat lamb? have sex with it?

re 13494

this has to be the
best and worst of bad haiku
palsy fits right in

my fingers are numb
from counting fives and sevens
i need those twelve steps

Walking on the roof
of Hell we are gazing at
so many flowers

if you meet Buddha
on the road, you're probably
not smoking winstons..

What do you mean "This is a bad haiku website"?

Sleeping is my favourite hobby

Penile refreshments
gently fulfil the thirsty cops
They have guns --my bad.

Potery

Clay Jars break swiftly
hurried chaos on my floor
Bonsai look better

Problems

I have problems
writing haiku because
I have problems writing

Dangerously Kilted

Rocks giggle 'neath skirts
Haggis comes out unchanged
Who's laughing now!

before satori
i'd chop wood and draw water
now, it's vice versa

The RINZAI SCHOOL

striking the Buddha
with fists: we must -- we're not even
enlightened yet!

DREAM #361

heaven: miles of snow.
earth: gallons of milk -- the cows
lounge, the barn burns.

PENANCE

blue beetles running
on a mudflap while we pick
the oblong green pears.

She has left that prick
he always went in head first
causing her to bleed

Oui Esse, Tu Durak
Play with clay, I say today
Clayman - Claywoman

woman in next cube
she noisily passes gas
smells like baby food

triple entendres
are really tough to pull off:
nixon, what a dick!

joe frank lifts the rug
where we sweep all our despair
and wades into it

Woman asked barkeep
for a double entendre
he gave it to her

I now have a watch
That receives text messages
Neat-o Torpedo!

i have but one name
though some may call me trouble
kiss my cloven butt

haiku 13482

I have many names,
Son of the Morning is one.
Kiss my cloven hoof.

Isaiah 14:12

At Safeway this week:
fresh cut asparagus spears,
two pounds for a buck

Walt Disney once said:
"It's a small world after all..."
-Now HE'S in a fridge!

some radiation
experimental whaling
ain't it all science?

so cheap and crude...
perhaps a big degrading
blame Society

dolphin in tuna -
that's what i was suggesting
though not ground to bits

Best dolphin I had
was caught in a net and ground
up in my tuna

The spot on your back
that I pressed just right last night
is still on my mind

Stumbling through the grass
I find my way back to camp
but too stoned to sleep

My sky spins blue
like the waves that surround you
making me spin, too

The beast comes at you
his eyes are bright white but they
turn red in retreat

bet, be my mermaid -
give to me your salty spray
take a dolphin ride

she goes in colors
she's a rainbow a rainbow
erotic colors

yes! good idea!
got to keep on movin', move
move on far away

*correction:

the pressure of legs
strong enough to part the sea
i rise from its depths...

the pressure of legs
strong enough to part the sea
i'm rising from its depths...

Legs drape cross your lap
while sweat beading sun leaves you
a wet silhouette

cetaceous rumblings
in this electric ocean
and saline so sweet

trickling the sea
i swim against your current
nameless, briny, moist

a rolling drop of
lubricious perspiration
escaping navel

quickening, rounding
the banked curves of soft belly
lost in a thicket

the surface tension
of a rolling bead of sweat
has captured my thoughts

grunting and moaning
yelling, huffing and puffing
and he's just typing

Sweat beads from your lips
tickling my neck as they run
down past my belly

Could be, I'm not sure
could be first drafts, practice and
time for me to move on

what does it all mean?
you talk a load of crap moxie
far as I can tell