"Sticking feathers up
your ass will not make you a
chicken," said Tyler.
by Regendrification should be a word.
 
			
Boink a sex-changed bull.
Requantify your gender.
Wear strap-on udders.
by Buy them with Amazon Prime. of Order deep fried bull balls with UberEats. 
 
			
*Requantify
by Anonymous Poet
 
			
Boink is just a verb.
Requatify is also.
Udder is a noun.
by I would rather be a pro baseball player than a pronoun.
 
			
Lemme aisk you, Clem:
Is it "Doctor Kissinger"
Or jess "Mister K"?
by Angela Merkel of Greater Appalachia 
 
			
Mommy mommy help.
I have a dirty haiku.
Change me mommy. Waaah!
by Dr. Henry Kissinger of Big Ideas For Global Change 
 
			
Hoo hoo
by Missing Link I mean Syllables  of Previous Second Simian Line 
 
			
I ooh ooh ah ah.
You ah ah ooh ooh.
We communicate.
by And Catch Termites with Stalks  of Grass 
 
			
I am King Monkey,
the greatest jungle swinger.
Bring me bananas.
by Charles Darwin of Jungle Book 
 
			
Please use my pronouns: 
Boink/Udder/Requantify
(Be considerate)
by A Man-girl Who Identifies As a Piece of Cheese (with beard and mascara) 
 
			
Please stop making fun
Of split personality.
Oh wait...that was me.
by You Do You, She'll Do Him of We Am All Together 
 
			
It is NOT easy
Typing in a straitjacket.
Have to use my teeth.
by No Doctor I Don't Hear Voices But I'm Fearful of That Radio Inside My Head 
 
			
When poets fly high
They make the mere mortals sigh...
Whoops-- time for my meds.
by Seroquel is Swell of Ward 7 North 
 
			
When reindeers fly high
they defecate in the sky
Here's mud in your eye
by Smudge of Sludge Fudge 
 
			
Lmao, I
Say it again lma...
Oh oh oh oh.. ohhhh...
by Vhs
 
			
President Kanye
That would have been so awesome
He's fucking crazy
by Anonymous Poet
 
			
I'm solipsistic,
I think it's all about ME.
That's why I love you.
by As Long As You Are Pretty of Course... 
 
			
I'm Calvinistic:
God's sovereignly elected...
So - I'm His problem.
by Luther Von Knox of Saxony Mit Bratwurst 
 
			
I'm masochistic
So you realize now then I
Enjoy the harsh pain
by Vhs
 
			
Can you please explain?
You think one of these are "GOOD"?
I guess I'll die now.
by Anonymous Pooet
 
			
every damn time im not 
here and you post GOOD haiku!
flavor them with salt!
by vhs
 
			
Rather amusing answer
by DonaldNum of Oman 
 
			
Heather Williams farted
during PE class and we have
photographic proof of the fart.
by Eric
 
			
We all deserve "it".
You more than anyone else.
You who now reads this.
by Anonymous Pooet
 
			
Santa is Satan.
He distracts dead souls from truth.
He might be Jewish.
by Rebbe of Reindeer 
 
			
What time? What channel?
Vengeance is good for ratings.
True must see tv
by Studio Audience
 
			
All of them will pay.
They will feel my vengeance SOON.
They will beg for death.
by Not Sure Who But They Deserve It
 
			
I mean three LINE check.
Not three link.  We don't need links.
Missing links maybe.
by Anonymous pooet.
 
			
Testing the waters.
I'm doing your work for you.
Please send me a check.
1
2
3
4
by Anonymous Poet
 
			
Three link checker.
Syllable is too difficult.
But allow nude pics.
by Anonymous Poet
 
			
Just about ready.
Next year will be good to die.
I hope that I poop.
by Anonymous Poet
 
			
Was going to im-
-plement a sylable che-
-cker. Now not so sure
by Janis of Go pick on someone your own size, botfarm. 
 
			
I have a lot more
where that came from, however
you're hard of hearing.
by Author  of Book of Hebrews (NYT Best-seller!) 
 
			
Hard time of the year
for Moslems, Jews and Atheists.
please remember them.
by Saint John Knox of East Lothian 1568 
 
			
God can have it all:
absurd data-driven shit
that passes for life.
by Pastel Shades of Another Corporate PowerPoint Presentation 
 
			
I wouldn't call this art.
Hell, it's not even functional.
But here you are.
by Anonymous Poet
 
			
Special Processed American Meat.
Self-Propogating Alternative Media.
Spanking Penguins All Month.
by Anonymous Poet
 
			
And Libertarian.
by Anonymous Poet
 
			
You left out Librarians.
by Anonymous Poet
 
			
Thieves and murderers.
Whores, pornographers, and pimps.
These are the poets.
by Anonymous Poet
 
			
Talk about Jacko:
a horrible role-model,
a bad musician.
by ABC, Easy as 123 of Do Re Mi  
 
			
Jizz Lane. There's a stain.
Listen for the old refrain
Cuntfart Cuntfart Cunt!
by The Law Orifices of Cuntfart Cuntfart and Cunt 
 
			
Ghislaine. Such a pain.
So what does she stand to gain?
Will you please explain?
by Some Haiku Writer Not On Payroll  of MI6, CIA, Mossad or KGB  
 
			
i wonder where the
spam is coming from right now
and what can be done
by vhs
 
			
I've got no front teeth
You'll find me at the ice rink
I enjoy fine cheese
by Puck Hattricker of Ice Rink 
 
			
russian haiku will
haiku you!  now drink kvass and
play tetris y'all
by vhs
 
			
Russian spam: it's gross.
Do not ask how they make it
or what is in it.
by Missing Dissidents of Industrial Meat-processing Metaphor 
 
			
There was an old man: limerick-writer from Japan...
Day-job was haiku.
by Syllabalogically Challenged of Unglazed Raku Ceramic Chamberpot of Verse 
 
			
The oldest haiku
hung in the air, like a fart
Stop and smell the art
by Gallery of Fart 
 
			
Lobster theatre 
Lots of singing and dancing 
But not much story
by But hey, they're just lobsters so what do you expect ?