Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
27 Years, 213 Days and 77128 Haiku later...

I'm solipsistic,
I think it's all about ME.
That's why I love you.
Haiku # 74327, December 17, 2021 5:59 pm ET
by As Long As You Are Pretty of Course...
I'm Calvinistic:
God's sovereignly elected...
So - I'm His problem.
Haiku # 74326, December 17, 2021 5:56 pm ET
by Luther Von Knox of Saxony Mit Bratwurst
I'm masochistic
So you realize now then I
Enjoy the harsh pain
Haiku # 74325, December 17, 2021 3:38 pm ET
by Vhs
Can you please explain?
You think one of these are "GOOD"?
I guess I'll die now.
Haiku # 74324, December 17, 2021 12:12 pm ET
by Anonymous Pooet
every damn time im not
here and you post GOOD haiku!
flavor them with salt!
Haiku # 74323, December 17, 2021 12:02 pm ET
by vhs
Rather amusing answer
Haiku # 74322, December 17, 2021 10:18 am ET
by DonaldNum of Oman
Heather Williams farted
during PE class and we have
photographic proof of the fart.
Haiku # 74321, December 17, 2021 9:03 am ET
by Eric
We all deserve "it".
You more than anyone else.
You who now reads this.
Haiku # 74320, December 16, 2021 5:57 pm ET
by Anonymous Pooet
Santa is Satan.
He distracts dead souls from truth.
He might be Jewish.
Haiku # 74319, December 16, 2021 3:29 pm ET
by Rebbe of Reindeer
What time? What channel?
Vengeance is good for ratings.
True must see tv
Haiku # 74318, December 16, 2021 1:48 pm ET
by Studio Audience
All of them will pay.
They will feel my vengeance SOON.
They will beg for death.
Haiku # 74317, December 16, 2021 10:47 am ET
by Not Sure Who But They Deserve It
I mean three LINE check.
Not three link. We don't need links.
Missing links maybe.
Haiku # 74316, December 16, 2021 9:20 am ET
by Anonymous pooet.
Testing the waters.
I'm doing your work for you.
Please send me a check.

Haiku # 74315, December 16, 2021 9:19 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Three link checker.
Syllable is too difficult.
But allow nude pics.
Haiku # 74314, December 16, 2021 9:18 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Just about ready.
Next year will be good to die.
I hope that I poop.
Haiku # 74313, December 16, 2021 9:17 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Was going to im-
-plement a sylable che-
-cker. Now not so sure
Haiku # 74312, December 16, 2021 9:16 am ET
by Janis of Go pick on someone your own size, botfarm.
I have a lot more
where that came from, however
you're hard of hearing.
Haiku # 74311, December 16, 2021 9:11 am ET
by Author of Book of Hebrews (NYT Best-seller!)
Hard time of the year
for Moslems, Jews and Atheists.
please remember them.
Haiku # 74310, December 16, 2021 9:08 am ET
by Saint John Knox of East Lothian 1568
God can have it all:
absurd data-driven shit
that passes for life.
Haiku # 74309, December 16, 2021 9:06 am ET
by Pastel Shades of Another Corporate PowerPoint Presentation
I wouldn't call this art.
Hell, it's not even functional.
But here you are.
Haiku # 74308, December 16, 2021 8:18 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Special Processed American Meat.
Self-Propogating Alternative Media.
Spanking Penguins All Month.
Haiku # 74307, December 16, 2021 7:48 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
And Libertarian.
Haiku # 74306, December 16, 2021 7:33 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
You left out Librarians.
Haiku # 74305, December 16, 2021 6:19 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Thieves and murderers.
Whores, pornographers, and pimps.
These are the poets.
Haiku # 74304, December 16, 2021 5:59 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Talk about Jacko:
a horrible role-model,
a bad musician.
Haiku # 74302, December 15, 2021 10:20 am ET
by ABC, Easy as 123 of Do Re Mi
Jizz Lane. There's a stain.
Listen for the old refrain
Cuntfart Cuntfart Cunt!
Haiku # 74300, December 14, 2021 9:06 pm ET
by The Law Orifices of Cuntfart Cuntfart and Cunt
Ghislaine. Such a pain.
So what does she stand to gain?
Will you please explain?
Haiku # 74299, December 14, 2021 8:34 pm ET
by Some Haiku Writer Not On Payroll of MI6, CIA, Mossad or KGB
i wonder where the
spam is coming from right now
and what can be done
Haiku # 74298, December 14, 2021 3:51 pm ET
by vhs
I've got no front teeth
You'll find me at the ice rink
I enjoy fine cheese
Haiku # 74295, December 14, 2021 11:51 am ET
by Puck Hattricker of Ice Rink
russian haiku will
haiku you! now drink kvass and
play tetris y'all
Haiku # 74294, December 14, 2021 11:05 am ET
by vhs
Russian spam: it's gross.
Do not ask how they make it
or what is in it.
Haiku # 74292, December 14, 2021 5:35 am ET
by Missing Dissidents of Industrial Meat-processing Metaphor
There was an old man: limerick-writer from Japan...
Day-job was haiku.
Haiku # 74291, December 14, 2021 5:31 am ET
by Syllabalogically Challenged of Unglazed Raku Ceramic Chamberpot of Verse
The oldest haiku
hung in the air, like a fart
Stop and smell the art
Haiku # 74289, December 14, 2021 1:27 am ET
by Gallery of Fart
Lobster theatre
Lots of singing and dancing
But not much story
Haiku # 74288, December 13, 2021 11:27 pm ET
by But hey, they're just lobsters so what do you expect ?
What-hey! Tally-ho!
And a hey nonny nonny
Right-ho, guv'nor. Cor.
Haiku # 74287, December 13, 2021 10:35 pm ET
by A Frenchman
Battery double
Eh. Canadian made good
For tirty below
Haiku # 74286, December 13, 2021 9:55 pm ET
by Vhs
I bought some butter.
But it was bitter, so I
bought better butter.
Haiku # 74285, December 13, 2021 11:12 am ET
by Betty Baughter
I bought an iron.
But the damn thing didn't work.
So I returned it.
Haiku # 74284, December 13, 2021 10:35 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Irony is not
What it used to be quite the
Irony I think
Haiku # 74283, December 13, 2021 8:01 am ET
by Vhs
Your favorite robot
Does it look more machine like?
More like a person?
Haiku # 74282, December 13, 2021 4:55 am ET
by Robot of Choice
Vermin free living
My New Year's rezolution
Suggestions welcomed
Haiku # 74281, December 13, 2021 4:51 am ET
by Dawg of Rez
Seems like nothing helps.
Not even Tom Boseley helps.
Not even the Lord...
Haiku # 74280, December 13, 2021 3:57 am ET
by Existential Emptiness of Sleep that Went Away
Insomnia. Night.
The sense of abandonment
Challenges my faith.
Haiku # 74279, December 13, 2021 3:53 am ET
by Hoping For an Outcome of Light
Face like an old dog
Memories of Tom Bosley
wagging his penis
Haiku # 74278, December 13, 2021 3:47 am ET
by Pack of Curs
But that Donna Reed,
She blows Tom Boseley away.
And his penis too.
Haiku # 74277, December 12, 2021 9:50 pm ET
by Stimmy Jewart of Hollywouldn't
Tom Boseley featured
on "It's a Wonderful Life"
Disc side 2: outtakes
Haiku # 74276, December 12, 2021 9:45 pm ET
by His Sweater Was Horrendous of I Was Almost Crying
I saw Tom Bosley!
Had no idea he's real.
Why is he famous?
Haiku # 74275, December 12, 2021 9:16 pm ET
by Besides His Much-mentioned Member of Ask Uncle Darth
The air smelled like ass
Dank, all-night bingo chair musk
Haiku # 74274, December 12, 2021 9:07 pm ET
by Official hobby of Darth Figpucker (It's got numbers)
What's a technocrat?
Would that be Mark Zuckerberg?
If so, I agree:

He can eat your ass.
And I mean eat it all night.
With peanuts and corn.
Haiku # 74273, December 12, 2021 8:28 pm ET
by Aristotechnobureauauto
As I said before:
Technocrats can EAT my ASS.
You are doomed to fail.
Haiku # 74272, December 12, 2021 5:09 pm ET
by Silicon Chip On my Shoulder of Your Mother's Mother
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