Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
28 Years, 39 Days and 77431 Haiku later...

Are your nipples hard.
Maybe it's just the cold weather.
Not that I would know.
Haiku # 74247, December 11, 2021 11:49 am ET
by But then, it's always cold where you crazies live, huh? of Damn Canadians, with your beady eyes and flapping heads.
If you like, outlaw
the Russian gobbledygook
we'll get much less spam.
Haiku # 74246, December 11, 2021 11:46 am ET
by Got to be a quick copy paste code for that.
Bullshit science news.
Warp drives, fusion, nanotech.
Google is garbage.

But it's not Farcebook.
Hot Asian girls on TikTok.
Lose weight with this pill.

Be a teenager.
Reverse the aging process.
Ninety-nine dollars.
Haiku # 74244, December 11, 2021 9:16 am ET
by I wrote this whilst pooping. of Somewhere I'd rather not be.
Oh how I love you:
All misfit haiku poets.
You are voice of truth.
Haiku # 74242, December 10, 2021 6:01 pm ET
by But What Is Truth? of Pontius Pilates Method
The holodomor
Ukraine doth not want Russias
Hungry land hunger
Haiku # 74241, December 10, 2021 5:13 pm ET
by Vhs
Russia is showing
Appreciation of spam
By spamming this place?
Haiku # 74240, December 10, 2021 3:36 pm ET
by Vhs of WWII reference
Poetic watchdog
Image 25 years
Of sweeping up shit
Haiku # 74238, December 10, 2021 1:28 pm ET
by Janis of Smoke break in the custodian's office.
Ron Nat fucked a bat
Then his fat ass sat and shat
In his cowboy hat
Haiku # 74236, December 10, 2021 11:51 am ET
by Studio Audience
Ronald Nat, you shat . . .
and your foul verborrhea
is exactly that.
Haiku # 74234, December 10, 2021 8:34 am ET
by Then Again You Are A Bot of Feel the Luv
Your erection was storen

(7 syrraburs)
Haiku # 74232, December 10, 2021 6:16 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Prease risten to me:
Erection was STOREN!
Donard Trump weenah!
Haiku # 74231, December 10, 2021 6:14 am ET
by Shiromatsu Sakamoto of Wearing a Bamboo Hat While Programming Vote Machine
orgasmatron
Haiku # 74230, December 9, 2021 11:04 pm ET
by Order Yours Today of *helmet not included
Stuff the balot box
See who wins the erection
Aphrodisiac
Haiku # 74229, December 9, 2021 11:02 pm ET
by HaikQ-anon of Orgamatron and voting booth
Hey, Zeus! Jesus! LORD!
Wanted haiku, got novel.
Can we nuke Russia?
Haiku # 74228, December 9, 2021 10:24 pm ET
by Can we, mom, pleeeeze?????
This are circumvent.
Your essays is valious
for high notes of bot
Haiku # 74226, December 9, 2021 4:04 pm ET
by Like Yo Mama's Ugly Bot-ass-face of Chinee Dragon Breath Ching-Chong Oh sorry
Our world is absurd.
Nowhere can the truth be heard.
Balot of lies. Word.
Haiku # 74225, December 9, 2021 3:59 pm ET
by Surfin' Biiiiirrrrrrd %4#@ of Papa Mao Mao Poppa Mao Ma Mao
Coffee rented in
Our system turns into bad
Body humor here
Haiku # 74222, December 9, 2021 2:40 pm ET
by Vhs
The Collected Works
Of Sir Darth Figpucker, Esq.
That's my Christmas list
Haiku # 74221, December 9, 2021 2:34 pm ET
by Starkitten
I don't have a dink.
Tell me, how do guys make foam?
Is there a button?
Haiku # 74219, December 9, 2021 9:01 am ET
by bathroom barista of coming soon to a bathroom near you
When guys pee, we try
to foam up the whole surface.
And God does that too.
Haiku # 74218, December 9, 2021 7:09 am ET
by With infinite power, what else would one do?
In the middle of
my psychological test
I spoke in haiku
Haiku # 74216, December 9, 2021 2:39 am ET
by sk of Straitjacket
That was a bad bad
Haiku where I just farted
After reading it.
Haiku # 74214, December 8, 2021 9:06 pm ET
by Vhs
Yeah, you win.
Haiku # 74213, December 8, 2021 6:38 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
i know I'm getting
older, high blood pressure and
pissing contests here.

as in pissing out
the high blood pressure causing
coffee, gatorade.
Haiku # 74212, December 8, 2021 6:27 pm ET
by vhs of i had a pissing contest this evening.
Too much glory hole.
You should get a hotel room.
Your knees will thank you.
Haiku # 74211, December 8, 2021 5:26 pm ET
by Or by today's standard, just do it on a park bench. of If arrested, just claim cultural discrimination and denying your gender identity.
Heck, my knees are stiff
Haikumatoid darthritis
Need horse liniment
Haiku # 74210, December 8, 2021 4:44 pm ET
by Good neighbor of Neighborhood
The balot ballet.
Dance with fertilized swan eggs.
Hard boiled, limber.
Haiku # 74207, December 8, 2021 2:26 pm ET
by Karaoke Opera
Weird old uncle Joe:
hit were YOU that abused me...
now yore PREZIDINT?
Haiku # 74206, December 8, 2021 10:25 am ET
by Ah Knowed Hit Were You of Mama Done Tole Me
If you distill me
you'll get a vial of vile.
Sell it on dark web.
Haiku # 74205, December 8, 2021 9:59 am ET
by Cousin Hillbilly-Joe Figpucker of Arkansas meth lab.
Balot scented air
freshener cracked my ass up!
That was effing gold!
Haiku # 74204, December 8, 2021 9:55 am ET
by I needed that!
Oh Darth, we love you.
We love you because you're vile,
and also quite gay.
Haiku # 74202, December 8, 2021 9:11 am ET
by Joyful, Glad, Happy, Christmasy, Pumpkin Latte of Balot Air Freshener
The price of haiku
The cost of one balot egg
The smell of a fart
Haiku # 74201, December 8, 2021 8:24 am ET
by Selection of Dollar Menu
*too
Haiku # 74200, December 8, 2021 7:27 am ET
by oops
Don't get to angry.
You might spit out your dentures.
And I'll have to laugh.
Haiku # 74199, December 8, 2021 7:27 am ET
by Goood. Goooood! I can feel that hate flow through you!
Pumpkin spice latte.
That's as gay as you can get.
"Wooo-Wooo!" Fag alert!
Haiku # 74198, December 8, 2021 7:17 am ET
by Siren noises are gay too, huh? of Lot of things are gay!
I am not that gay.
Maybe just a little bit.
I might suck a dick.

But I will never
ever eat pineapple on
pizza--that's too gay!

Airport glory hole.
Preferable meal to
Hawaiian pizza.
Haiku # 74197, December 8, 2021 7:15 am ET
by Four out of five fags agree!
Hip-hip hooray ! Yay!
Fabulous Darth is so gay!
(Just wanted to say...)
Haiku # 74196, December 8, 2021 7:08 am ET
by Brand New Day of While Sunny, Make Hay
Women without teeth
are never to be trusted.
Lies rot everything.
Haiku # 74195, December 8, 2021 4:11 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
When my head's opened.
What strange disease rots my brain.
Skull meat on a slide.
Haiku # 74194, December 8, 2021 4:08 am ET
by Wheeee!
Let's gamble on bugs.
Beats the hell out of cock fight.
Spider vs. Roach.
Haiku # 74193, December 8, 2021 4:04 am ET
by $50
Moooo goes the brown cow.
Bark bark goes the yellow dog.
Wait, the dog's yellow?!
Haiku # 74192, December 8, 2021 3:57 am ET
by That's just wrong!
I ate the parsley.
Then gave the steak to the dog.
Uncle Jim was pissed.
Haiku # 74191, December 8, 2021 3:54 am ET
by Parsley, sage, rosemary, and time of your life.
listen, did i have
time, im distracted by the
usual suspects
Haiku # 74189, December 8, 2021 2:52 am ET
by vhs of wheres kaiser sosa now?
Say, have you ever
stood under the cameltoe
and got a wet kiss?
Haiku # 74188, December 8, 2021 1:00 am ET
by Foolishness of Xmas
VHS wrote that?
Did someone spike the Moxie?
End of year clean out
Haiku # 74187, December 7, 2021 10:21 pm ET
by Toilet Paper made of of 2021 calendar
But you can't die yet
Then the show would be over
Only commercials
Haiku # 74186, December 7, 2021 10:13 pm ET
by Studio Audience of Out there in the dark
Have you ever wanted to just die?
All because you're sick of counting syllables.
I mean, why the fuck bother, right?
Haiku # 74185, December 7, 2021 9:50 pm ET
by I like the idea of puppets spitting. of Nasty little puppet, you like my hand up there, don'cha?
einei meini mi
will not take a knee in this
ritual toss off...
Haiku # 74184, December 7, 2021 9:47 pm ET
by vhs
Please do not ask Darth
About "Chinese Wet-markets"
If he's been drinking...
Haiku # 74182, December 7, 2021 9:32 pm ET
by Abominable Things Are In Their Vessels of Dragon People
It's all Bill Gates fault.
Terrible vengeance draws near:
Let's Wuhan his ass!
Haiku # 74181, December 7, 2021 9:28 pm ET
by "Vengeance is Mine" Sayeth Somebody
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