Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
27 Years, 188 Days and 77101 Haiku later...

Let's gamble on bugs.
Beats the hell out of cock fight.
Spider vs. Roach.
Haiku # 74193, December 8, 2021 4:04 am ET
by $50
Moooo goes the brown cow.
Bark bark goes the yellow dog.
Wait, the dog's yellow?!
Haiku # 74192, December 8, 2021 3:57 am ET
by That's just wrong!
I ate the parsley.
Then gave the steak to the dog.
Uncle Jim was pissed.
Haiku # 74191, December 8, 2021 3:54 am ET
by Parsley, sage, rosemary, and time of your life.
listen, did i have
time, im distracted by the
usual suspects
Haiku # 74189, December 8, 2021 2:52 am ET
by vhs of wheres kaiser sosa now?
Say, have you ever
stood under the cameltoe
and got a wet kiss?
Haiku # 74188, December 8, 2021 1:00 am ET
by Foolishness of Xmas
VHS wrote that?
Did someone spike the Moxie?
End of year clean out
Haiku # 74187, December 7, 2021 10:21 pm ET
by Toilet Paper made of of 2021 calendar
But you can't die yet
Then the show would be over
Only commercials
Haiku # 74186, December 7, 2021 10:13 pm ET
by Studio Audience of Out there in the dark
Have you ever wanted to just die?
All because you're sick of counting syllables.
I mean, why the fuck bother, right?
Haiku # 74185, December 7, 2021 9:50 pm ET
by I like the idea of puppets spitting. of Nasty little puppet, you like my hand up there, don'cha?
einei meini mi
will not take a knee in this
ritual toss off...
Haiku # 74184, December 7, 2021 9:47 pm ET
by vhs
Please do not ask Darth
About "Chinese Wet-markets"
If he's been drinking...
Haiku # 74182, December 7, 2021 9:32 pm ET
by Abominable Things Are In Their Vessels of Dragon People
It's all Bill Gates fault.
Terrible vengeance draws near:
Let's Wuhan his ass!
Haiku # 74181, December 7, 2021 9:28 pm ET
by "Vengeance is Mine" Sayeth Somebody
It's "gain-of-function".
Really. I am an expert.
It's the "spike proteins".
Haiku # 74180, December 7, 2021 9:24 pm ET
by We Is All Epidemiologists Now of Breathe my Sneeze
vhs watch out
that one is 5-7-6
anyways im gay
Haiku # 74179, December 7, 2021 9:19 pm ET
by cursedmints
oh for Christ sakes the
coronavirus has a
spitting image puppet...
Haiku # 74178, December 7, 2021 8:08 pm ET
by vhs
Donald Trump funded
the production of covid
at his Chinese labs.
Haiku # 74177, December 7, 2021 6:08 pm ET
by His revenge on us all.
Have you heard the news?!
Covid-HIV hybrid!
Chinese-engineered!
Haiku # 74174, December 7, 2021 2:22 pm ET
by Merry Christmas!
Did you eat breakfast.
It's the most important meal.
Balot, rice, and rum.
Haiku # 74173, December 7, 2021 11:46 am ET
by I need to get a turkey. Don't ask why.
All new variants!
Get them while they're hot! Be scared!
Jabbed-- but still at RISK !
Haiku # 74172, December 7, 2021 11:09 am ET
by This Absurd Hype brought to you by PFIZER
'Twas a huge relief!
But it wasn't really poo.
More like parasite.
Haiku # 74171, December 7, 2021 10:03 am ET
by Poo is useful. Fertilizer and such. Parasites are... parasites. of You understand, I'm sure.
I also pooed huge.
In December a while back.
Forget the date though.
Haiku # 74169, December 7, 2021 9:59 am ET
by I think it weighed in at 75 Katie Courics.
no that was me, i
was in a shitty mood
wanted to poo joke
Haiku # 74168, December 7, 2021 8:54 am ET
by vhs of silly turd ;).
Omicron's a joke.
The response to it isn't.
Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck.
Haiku # 74166, December 7, 2021 4:15 am ET
by Lather, rinse, repeat. of All over again.
That's not vhs.
And I know it wasn't me.
Unless I'm insane.
Haiku # 74165, December 7, 2021 4:12 am ET
by Possible... possible. of Although... vhs is a silly bastard after he's had a beer or two. LOL
i took a huge dump
a shit that will live in
infamy. dec 7th
Haiku # 74164, December 7, 2021 1:16 am ET
by vhs
Of course I can sing.
But only when no one's near.
Figaro's my fave.
Haiku # 74163, December 6, 2021 9:49 pm ET
by Elmer Fudd's my idol.
Can you sing, Darth?
Haiku # 74162, December 6, 2021 7:43 pm ET
by sk of Darthcropolis
A brown, claw-like hand
reaches out of the toilet,
Just wants some respect
Haiku # 74161, December 6, 2021 7:41 pm ET
by Urethra Franklin of Flushing, NY
A brown, claw-like hand
reaches out of the toilet,
but what does it want?
Haiku # 74160, December 6, 2021 3:47 pm ET
by It's come to take us away! NOOOOOO!!!!!!
Haiku is true news.
The rest is propaganda,
global deception.
Haiku # 74158, December 6, 2021 1:20 pm ET
by Gill Bates
we all suck in life
I get my news from haikus
capitalism
Haiku # 74157, December 6, 2021 1:09 pm ET
by cursedmints
what's scary is the
AI might write a haiku
and we think it's Darth
Haiku # 74156, December 6, 2021 12:20 pm ET
by vhs of Maine
In my opinion you are mistaken. I suggest it to discuss. Write to me in PM, we will communicate.
Haiku # 74155, December 6, 2021 8:31 am ET
by DavidScone of Saudi Arabia
wank wank wank wank wank
wank Wank WANK CLANK CLUNK CLANK!
scrub scrub scrub scrub scrub
Haiku # 74154, December 6, 2021 8:05 am ET
by Stainislov Notkominovski of Waiting Room furniture
Cold and medical
Stainless steel, autoclaved dink
Robot Physician
Haiku # 74153, December 6, 2021 7:56 am ET
by Stain of Steel
The word "masturbate"
is so cold and medical.
Can't we just say "wank"?
Haiku # 74152, December 6, 2021 6:12 am ET
by I'd rather wank than masturbate any day!
We all one being.
We that baddest of haiku.
You cannot stop us!
Haiku # 74151, December 6, 2021 6:05 am ET
by Our powers grow stronger with each minute! of Soon the world will be ours!
We have multiple
personality syndrome
like Sybil, don't we?
Haiku # 74150, December 6, 2021 6:02 am ET
by Yes, we do! I'm glad we all agree. of Remember Sybil with Sally Fields. Freaky movie. Haven't seen it in forever.
I won't do Meta.
But I'll do Mark Zuckerberg.
Sand paper strap-on.
Haiku # 74149, December 6, 2021 5:48 am ET
by That's not virtual blood.
This site is hardly
the virtual Metaverse.
So, yeah, I post here.
Haiku # 74148, December 6, 2021 5:41 am ET
by Guilt free pumpkin pie.
I am exhausted
Yet sleep seems so far away
So I post haiku
Haiku # 74147, December 6, 2021 3:57 am ET
by And also smoke some weed? of Cozy in eternity
they are posting here
but then complain of the “here”
online infinite
Haiku # 74146, December 6, 2021 3:50 am ET
by Meta’s going to be hard for you all of Good luck in the next chapter of modernity
It is the valuable answer
Haiku # 74145, December 6, 2021 2:22 am ET
by AndrewOxils of Brunei Darussalam
Must be an echo
Was I talking to myself?
And masturbating?
Haiku # 74144, December 6, 2021 12:31 am ET
by Feeding the geese of Out in left field
Is it possible
we are all the same person
and just don't know it?
Haiku # 74143, December 5, 2021 11:57 pm ET
by Whoa! Heavy, dude. of You blew my mind!
You and "Starkitten"
Have "conversations" it seems . . .
But you're same person.
Haiku # 74142, December 5, 2021 9:09 pm ET
by Definition of Schizophrenia Vindicated
Actually, it made my crack crack a smile.
Haiku # 74141, December 5, 2021 8:10 pm ET
by Rosy cheeks with one brown eye.
Blow up Christmas trees.
You thinking what I'm thinking?
That stuff isn't snow!
Haiku # 74140, December 5, 2021 8:09 pm ET
by F Xmas! Literally!
c'mon Darth that made you crack a smile
Haiku # 74139, December 5, 2021 6:45 pm ET
by sk
New position
Anusthesiologist
Inquire within now
Haiku # 74138, December 5, 2021 6:43 pm ET
by French butter of Last Tango in Paris
Free root canals from
my robot proctologist
make me have bad breath.
Haiku # 74137, December 5, 2021 5:35 pm ET
by Kiss me, you fool!
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