Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
27 Years, 219 Days and 77137 Haiku later...

Oh, these silly bulls.
Male bovines in tutus.
Count them, prancing by.
Haiku # 73416, November 10, 2021 5:47 pm ET
by Post-ballet BBQ. of Farmer Bill's Ranch
Your empty death threats,
dog poop, and marijuana
give me a boner.
Haiku # 73415, November 10, 2021 5:39 pm ET
by Fetishists Anonomous of In the jungle, checking my plants.
That would awesome.
Twenty-five years, then kaput.
Should be same for us.
Haiku # 73414, November 10, 2021 5:01 pm ET
by Life beyond 25 is just being greedy.
repent, ye sinners
you syllable miscounters
for the end is nye!
Haiku # 73413, November 10, 2021 4:57 pm ET
by scotch of bill nye, that is, ender of worlds
only two more days
to post all your bad haiku
then this site comes down
Haiku # 73412, November 10, 2021 4:53 pm ET
by scotch of rumor mongering HQ
She didn't do it
I pooped by the birdbath (wag)
i wrote that poem
Haiku # 73411, November 10, 2021 3:52 pm ET
by actual dog of Starkitten
Starkitten, you gotta quit pooping by the bird bath. They don't want to come around any more. Have some mercy on our avian brothers. Besides, if there are no birds, how can you catch and eat them? Go back to your litter box next time.
Haiku # 73410, November 10, 2021 3:40 pm ET
by Friendly defecation advice from your local neighborhood fecal advisor. of Fiscal Fecal, Accounting for Your Poo Since 1961.
Entertain us, entered anus.
Sparrow King, Catatafish.
Lemmiwinks or Lemmy winks.
Haiku # 73409, November 10, 2021 3:37 pm ET
by One Ton Wonton One-eyed-wonder-worm of Give me Motorhead.
I calculated it
There aren't enough hours in the day
to smoke all this weed
Haiku # 73408, November 10, 2021 3:34 pm ET
by Hotbox of haiku
the last haiku was written by a dirty dog
Haiku # 73407, November 10, 2021 3:31 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
He who dies in debt
only lost others' asses,
but still has his own.
Haiku # 73406, November 10, 2021 3:30 pm ET
by The only way to go.
shit by the birdbath
my nose held high in the air
my tail is lowered
Haiku # 73405, November 10, 2021 3:28 pm ET
by written by rez-dawg of Starkitten
Assess your losses:
your assets in arrears. How
you've fallen behind.
Haiku # 73404, November 10, 2021 3:15 pm ET
by Wipe Your Debt of Royal Flush
You should take a break.
Go and Seymour Butts; I did.
Thailand is awesome.
Haiku # 73403, November 10, 2021 2:29 pm ET
by Ass ass in ate was a ten ten.
I'll kill you then tell.
Dance on your fat rotten corpse.
Drug baby insists.
Haiku # 73402, November 10, 2021 2:12 pm ET
by It whispers to me at night. of "Kill the whore! Kill the whore!"
You are a liar!
My cat had killed the rabbit.
Brought it as a gift.
Haiku # 73401, November 10, 2021 2:07 pm ET
by It was tasty!
If you ever tell
I will kill you like I killed
That bunny rabbit.
Haiku # 73400, November 10, 2021 1:10 pm ET
by Uncle Seymour of Leavittown High Security Facility #13
The more people killed,
the more a hero you are.
Animals' revenge.
Haiku # 73399, November 10, 2021 11:23 am ET
by EF!
It's so refreshing.
This game is almost over.
How hateful it's been.
Haiku # 73398, November 10, 2021 7:52 am ET
by Worse than fucking Monopoly on bad acid.
Go out with a bang.
Timothy McVeigh should have.
What would Timmy do?
Haiku # 73397, November 10, 2021 6:04 am ET
i need to go pee
bladder's about to explode
but first, this haiku
Haiku # 73396, November 10, 2021 3:49 am ET
by scotch of would a robot need to go pee
That's impossible.
Neither the pilgrims nor the
Indians were good.
Haiku # 73395, November 9, 2021 10:27 pm ET
by Pokeahotass.
The pilgrims were good.
Squanto had been to Europe.
Don't believe the hype.
Haiku # 73394, November 9, 2021 9:31 pm ET
by Plymouth ROCKS ! of 1620
Доступные модульные еврозаборы от фирмы изготовителя
Haiku # 73393, November 9, 2021 6:13 pm ET
by KevinBuh of Russia
Yuri Bezmenov
Described the process for you.
Go do your research.
Haiku # 73392, November 9, 2021 2:46 pm ET
by Tomas David Schuman of Novosti
we have just three days
before this turns twenty-five
prepare to party
Haiku # 73391, November 9, 2021 2:26 pm ET
by scotch
you communist cock-sucker
ungrateful shit tick.
Haiku # 73390, November 9, 2021 11:10 am ET
by Greedy pig parasite. of Should have let the Japs rape you all!
How fat are you now?
You really should lose some weight.
Heart attack's waiting.
Haiku # 73389, November 9, 2021 10:33 am ET
by Rigid Rigamortis Wiggle Riggle Worm.
I smasha the grapes
I smasha you in the face
I make a you whine
Haiku # 73388, November 9, 2021 10:06 am ET
by Rural Guido of Rural location
Have you ever dipped
your dink in someone's wine just
because you hate them?
Haiku # 73387, November 9, 2021 7:49 am ET
by Then propose a toast. of Sorry, is it a bit salty?
Extra syllable.
Sticking out like my penis,
caught in the ladder.
Haiku # 73386, November 9, 2021 5:00 am ET
by OUCH! of Just here to wash the windows. Special cleaning fluid.
Call me paranoid.
Have you noticed Noticer's

Darth this, Darth that. Seriously gets old. Why don't you call me up some time. Buy me a beer.

Instead of "Noticer" call yourself "Antagonizer".
Giving this ant agony. Hi, sir.
Ha! You're probably my secretary.
Haiku # 73385, November 9, 2021 4:52 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Pygmy rapist will
filet and cook you after.
But will you taste sweet?
Haiku # 73384, November 9, 2021 4:36 am ET
by Somehow I doubt it. of Dead hooker in the trunk.
i just got blocked on
twitter by some guy who founded
Haiku # 73383, November 9, 2021 12:53 am ET
by vhs
Midget peeping Tom
Always the one caught looking
Fuck this goddam ladder!
Haiku # 73382, November 8, 2021 11:47 pm ET
by Noticer of wee male
im too paranoid
to be hamlet, alas poor...
oh, fuck, who's skull that?
Haiku # 73381, November 8, 2021 11:20 pm ET
by vhs
If you've been out-shagged,
you're one step ahead of us
other lame "poets".
Haiku # 73380, November 8, 2021 10:15 pm ET
by Good night, sweet prince! of May the moon shine down beams of golden fortune upon thee.
well since i have been
outjoked, outfoxed, outshagged then
I'm going to bed...
Haiku # 73379, November 8, 2021 8:02 pm ET
by moxie
Has your town been overrun by e-scooters?
Call 1-800-SCOOT-RID today!
Illegal aluminum recycler professionals you can count on.
Haiku # 73378, November 8, 2021 7:25 pm ET
by Seriously!
What would you like for
my next haiku to be on?
How about stop lights?
Haiku # 73377, November 8, 2021 6:06 pm ET
by That could be fun!
The Wall St. Journal
ran an article on stuff
that you shouldn't buy.
Haiku # 73376, November 8, 2021 6:02 pm ET
by Gotta catch 'em all!
Have you ever read
Emily Post's Etiquette?
It's captivating.
Haiku # 73375, November 8, 2021 5:59 pm ET
by Even better than TikTok!
He drew a circle.
Next to that he drew a square.
Then a triangle.
Haiku # 73374, November 8, 2021 5:49 pm ET
by Getting into shape.
Sound like a catheter brand name.
Probably made in China.

If you put a catheter up your nose you can douche out your nasal cavity and beat a covid RT-PCR test. 1 liter water, 3 large spoons iodized salt, 1 spoon baking soda, 1 spoon baby shampoo, 10 drops of 10% iodine solution.
Haiku # 73373, November 8, 2021 12:49 pm ET
by Fun times!
By supporting communism, we give them money to promote communism. Remember when the USSR fell... that was artificial. Get us to let our guard down. My opinion. Could be wrong.
Haiku # 73372, November 8, 2021 12:44 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
entropy vs penis?
chaos vs order? death, life?
moral systems, duh?
Haiku # 73371, November 8, 2021 12:43 pm ET
by vhs of 42, the meaning of life is a zen statement
Because we support communism.
If you don't believe it, look on all the products you buy. Where are they made? We buy them b/c we are greedy capitalists, and their products are cheap. And this isn't a haiku!

Oh, look what you made me do. Look what you made me do.... I forget the rest of that song. Proudly.
Haiku # 73370, November 8, 2021 12:42 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Evil versus good.
But what do they even mean?
Not sure they are real.
Haiku # 73369, November 8, 2021 12:39 pm ET
by We're all evil. Just look at what we have done... of What we do, and what we will do. Keeps getting worse.
why is communism
being promoted so strongly
by the media?
Haiku # 73368, November 8, 2021 12:38 pm ET
by vhs
Momma always said,
"Evil is as evil does."
Have some chocolates.
Haiku # 73367, November 8, 2021 12:37 pm ET
by Forrest Figpucker
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