(Moan) Operator?
Help me make an exhume call!
Get me my agent!
by Corpse of Hollywood
Tom Bosley's tomb
where up from the ground pops a
tumescent bloom (perv)
by Fruit of the Tomb
midgets with big dinks
men with womens' vaginas
under the Big Top
by Fat Lady of the circus
Stone Age erections
Wilma's hot tuna casserole
Fred's stubble glistens
by Out of Serviettes
Have you ever seen
Fred Flintstone pornography?
He's hard as a rock
by Sabertooth starkitten of Year 7002 B.C. (Before Haiku)
If you have to die,
make certain you are saved first
and don't make a mess.
by Spurting Arteries, Bulletholes, Stab Wounds of Bounty the Quicker Picker-upper
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The only difference
between you and me is this
giant bag of weed
by Anonymous Poet of Puffcific Northwest
God, I want to die.
Life is incredibly dull.
I've nothing to do.
by You know?
Mary, Mary, quite
contrary to the ordinary
shave your twat, it's too
damn hairy and scary.
Even the cassowary that eats
brie in a tree is wary.
by Harry Bush
Now back to haiku:
BLAM-BLAM-BLAM! Rat-a-tat-tat!
Ahhh. Subtle verses.
by Gentle Art of Automatic Weapons Firefight
Nothing against them
But they manifest symptoms
of confused culture.
by Sapphic Prophetess of Lesbos
To be a true lez
don't forget the Birkenstocks.
Pretend you have balls.
Never touch razors.
Blow your boogers to the wind.
Let your farts be loud.
by Being vegan helps too. of But not necessary.
lesbian tool belt
tuna packed in olive oil
free range armpit hair
by Haiku Poetry of lesbian section
Don't you dare deny
me my sexuality!
I'll eat your pussy!
by Lezbo Bob of "Lezbob"?
I'm a lesbian
trapped inside a man's body.
Doctor please help me.
by I'm a man identifying as a lesbian. of Can I use the ladies' room?
But with STDs
orgasms are more intense.
You'll scream much louder.
by It's when it gets into your brain that the fun really starts.
Give thanks to the Lord
For He is good. His mercy
Endures forever.
by Psalms of David
My Thanksgiving plans
A bowl of cereal and
Mechanical Turk
by Me, Myself and I of Turducken of misery
My grandmother's ghost
said to stop writing haiku
or she'd kick my ass.
by Ow!! You grumpy old bitch. of Fuck!! Ow!!! Stop it!!!
peddling my ass
risking stds and death
"for the cabinets"
by scotch of or I could just get the cheaper mdf
Can't someone help him?
That poor seagull is stuck there.
He can't land. Can't eat.
by Great Tsunami, put us all out of our misery
You're never bankrupt
You can always walk the streets
and peddle your ass
by Hey, it pays slightly better than haiku of More $ Less Crabs
Friendly reminder
Apocalypse Food Buckets
Christmas is coming
by Youtube of Vic Berger Presents Jim Bakker's food buckets
As Obi Wan said,
"That's no moon, it's bankruptcy."
Blow the whole thing up!
by The target area is only two meters wide. It's a small thermal exhaust port, right below the main port. of The shaft leads directly to the reactor system.
despite holes in walls,
i can see the moon shining
through my bank account
by scotch of pardon the dust
kitchen is too small
but only masochists think
"kitchen remodel"
by scotch of masochism central
Scuza da extra a syllable
by Anonymous Poet of Italy
Jesus walked with me
So I asked a Him a question
Are those Birkenstocks?
by Fuckin Hippie
I blame the Flintstones
"Gonna have a gay old time?"
Bad theme song lyrics
by A generation of American homosexuals because of Hanna Barbera
Are you sick of life.
Maybe life is sick of you.
You can divorce life.
by So many options.
New York Dolls aren't gay.
And there's something wrong with that.
Bunch of glam posers.
by Like so many of their time.
If the truth be told,
I'm a horrible person.
And keep getting worse.
by Thanks be to God for that!
Yeah and verily
I'm Janis of Toronto.
Damn straight. Right Janis?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E1I4A5yazr4
by Some Dead Haiku Genius of Beyond the Grave
I am IAmBack.
Well, at least I think I am . . .
Pretty sure its me.
by Personality Crisis of Got It While It Was HOT (New York Dolls)
You know you LOVE it.
Get your leg up on that bed.
Yeah, baby. Haikuuuuuuu . . . .
by Poetic Subjugation of Women Through Haiku Verse-form
Bring it on! Right NOW.
Bring it, pathetic bitches.
Let the haiku start!
by Eternal Recurrence of Genesis of Haiku Will to Power
Oh filthy weaklings
You shall be cleansed from the earth.
Then Haiku shall reign.
by Maybe a Few Limericks but only If They Are Good
I shall smite the world
with these haiku syllables.
just you watch, sucker.
by Bow before me for I am the omniscient omnipotent omnipresent Lord of the final haiku of the dreaded cleansing fire
The great mothership!
Behold she descends with lights!
Let judgement begin!
by But First Gotta Buy a 12-pack of Beer
Bring that black goat here:
Slit its throat now. Drain its blood.
Ah yes. I am pleased.
by Great Power of Exu of Macumba
I am Wallace Fard.
Yes, I AM the twelfth imam.
And I have returned.
by To Fulfill All Prophecy for those of Limited Intelligence
Am I not the Lord?
Do I not write the best verse?
My haiku kicks ASS.
by And I run the universe at the same time
When rat cages become overpopulated, many of the rats engage in homosexual behavior but still it does not fix the population problem or even slow the population growth much at all until it's too late and by then they are all dead from starvation and violence.
We should do that, more violence.
And they should stop putting chemicals in the water because it makes the freakin' frogs gay!
by Anonymous Poet
Holier than thou!
Speak ye not the name of God,
for that's just silly.
by Your silly goose is cooked!
Iron overdose.
Magnetic masturbation.
Testes: 1, 2, 3.
by Testicular polarity. of I'm just looking for North.
Poetry is dead!
If it's not, then what's that smell?
Oh wait, that's me... oops.
by Hard to control oneself at this age.
Maybe I need my
own talk radio program
since Limbaugh is dead.
by And then I'll run for president! of Iamback can be vice prez if he ever comes out of hiding. VHS can run the CIA.
I'm praying for war.
China versus the "free world".
Or us versus them.
Fuckers gonna hunt every wild animal in the world to extinction, so I say nuke the commies! I can no longer tollerate the greed of communism. Power hungry war lords. We must destroy them before they destroy us!
by You know I'm right.
Enough of these games!
Life's no longer worth living!
Bring me my chainsaw!
by I never was too wild about that Texas Chainsaw movie. of House of 1000 Corpses though... that's how to murder!