If you don't want farts,
then you need to go elsewhere.
That's all Japan has.
by Can a samurai sword cut a methane molecule? of Shogun's outhouse.
Quadruple back flip
with a triple aerial
A solid landing (no back splash, floaters, or Klingons)
by Those fecal gymnasts are THE SHIT!! of Fecal Gymnastics Olympics
How we long for more
Than Figpucker's farts; a bore.
Give Darth a low score.
by Haiku Scoring Committee of Tokyo Olympics
Belching twat waffles
Ingestion. Indigestion.
(with homemade whipped cream)
by Sir Lester Longpig of Breakfast nook
Long-winded Belgian
Look, he farts gobbledygook
and wipes with haiku
by 2-ply of July
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by StronVam of Belgium
This site is the best
It's like having a pen pal
in the Philippines
by The other poet
Up in Canada
They wipe with a hockey stick+
duct taped tea towel
by Slapshat of Splatshot
I heard in China
They wipe their bums with chopsticks
Works on potstickers
by Christopher Wokkin'
Extra syllable
Symbolizes the bus fart
It hangs in the air
by Driver, Next Stop of Running on fumes
Farting on mass transit
They'll be reaching for their masks
I will be smiling
by Commute of Odor
Cheese, cheese, we love cheese.
We support Darth Roquefort.
We am Chinese BOTS.
by Delta Bleus of MISSES SIPPY
Meatpackers Union
Spokesperson, Girth Pigpacker
Sat on his fat ass
by Cheese Killer of Serial Killers of the Philippines
Are you packing heat?
Shoplifted a pantsload of SPAM?
I'll be right over
by I'd tap that of Your Phone is Tapped
Oh ye haiku men,
Let us arise and fight them,
Unpoetic bots.
by Haiku Defense Squadron 119 of Janislandia
That's why you use spam.
The slab of meat can be carved
and then used for months.
Warm it when needed.
Keep it refrigerated.
Nuke it when wanted.
Multipurpose too.
Like use it for a shot glass.
Mushroomy liquor.
You will not get sick.
With all the preservatives
it lasts forever.
If it falls apart
from being overly-loved,
just shoplift more spam.
by "Code 300 in canned meat section." of Walmart
I'll think of you, dear
At the next Ladie's Luncheon
What a meat platter!
by Mrs. Cuntingham of Meet and Greet Committee
Do not fuck corned beef
Cut your unit on the can?
Your future's dead meat
by Will the REAL Darth Figpucker of Please stand up. (please stand up)
57 year old Technical Wire Jointer Leo from Fort Erie, really loves garage saleing, and ornithology. Preceding year just completed a journey Catalan Romanesque Churches of the Vall de BoÃ
by Jasonlep of Yemen
We're violated!
Raped by Russian spam monsters.
I used to rape spam.
Spam with a carved hole.
It may sound kind of slimy.
But it's more emotionally satisfying that screwing my ex, although both are artificially processed pork. And at least the spam has some dignity and self-respect.
by The Fartist Formerly Known As Darth Figpucker
https://bit.ly/3y8bt5A One of your body's main fat-burning hormonal agents DECREASES when you go on a diet plan?
Research has actually shown that this vital hormone come by as high as 50% after just 7 days of diet programs!
The most awful component is, the longer you try to diet, the even worse it gets, which is why lots of "serial dieters" constantly battle to keep the weight off (if they lose it whatsoever ...).
Fortunately is we're going to share the nutrition techniques to ENHANCE your body's natural fat-burning hormonal agents securely and also normally! https://bit.ly/3y8bt5A
by Jessepef of Barbados
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by StronVam of Belgium
The best strategy
They'll never see it coming
Tom Bosley dink bomb
by Beat the Bots of Save Bad Haiku
They shall taste defeat
We have a secret weapon
Tom Bosley's penis
by Haiku Sniper
Bots on the warpath,
Trying to take down Bad Haiku.
They shall fail, oh yes.
by Who Manatee United Against Bots
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by ErickSam
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by StronVam of Belgium
If not for the fact
that grandma still uses them
I just might do that.
by Grandma can mount her own dildos.
I have an old fashioned jar opener that's got to be almost 100 years old. It still works and has always been in use. Are you thinking of mounting grandma's antique dildo collection?
by Use Lube
Antique furniture.
Grandma's homemade apple pie.
Uncle Joe's porch swing.
by Marilyn Manson
Do you have any antique hand-operated kitchen devices such as cherry-pitters.
If so, do you hang them on the wall, or actually use them?
And was it handed down to you, or did you get it at a garage or estate sale?
And lastly are you pissed off that this is not a haiku or even spam like you expected?
by Tits.
If you don't wear pants
while you are meditating,
you will not crap them.
by I love farting in yoga class.
If you meditate
while you are crapping your pants,
do it in Walmart.
by Your 5 minutes of fame.
Japanese fountain.
Diarrhea yoga mix.
You get the picture.
by Enlightening. of You will be lighter when finished.
If you crap your pants
while you are meditating
you're doing it right
by Downward Facing of Dung
I guess that explains
the litters of figpuppers
(Telling Bob Barker)
by Consolation Prize of Turtle Wax
Never used Kleenex.
Tossed it to the dog next door.
Defenestrated.
by The dog won many blue ribbons for its shiny coat.
Poseknicker poem made me laugh
by Sk of pnw
I want you in me
With enough lubrication
the midget vanished
by I. Hearhim of He must be around here somewhere
You mean to tell me
All those wadded up Kleenex
are for your boogers?
by Darth's Mom of Looking under his bed
I want you in me,
the lion roared with menace
before he ate me.
by Now I'm a lion fart. of They roar from both ends.
I want you in me,
she whispered seductively.
So I picked her nose.
by Darth Poseknicker.
Golden Age of Porn
Dirk Figgpuckler picks his nose
Oh, those Boogie Nights
by Mark of Wallbooger
Golden Age of Porn
Dirk Figgpuckler picks his nose
Oh, those Boogie Nights
by Mark of Wallbooger
Oh Goddess, get stuffed.
Great celestial roast turkey you serve us all. Hail!
by Noble Pagan Praises of Turkey Goddess
Be my meat, oh bird.
Nest within my whole wheat bread.
Leftover goddess!
Just like prostitutes.
Dark or white doesn't matter.
As long as juicy.
by Is it Spanksgiving yet?
When it comes to fowl
I highly prefer turkey.
Perfect for munchies.
by Make me a samich!
At the county fair
Farmer Brown's huge black pecker
got the blue ribbon.
by Exotic poultry competition.
Chickens smoke pot in
a higher pecking order.
Farmer Brown's cookies.
by The cows just moo.
Your job is to eat
and run around and peck things
Have any questions?
by I Was going to ask where the the bathroom is located of But on further inspection , everybody just shits on the floor