Bots on the warpath,
Trying to take down Bad Haiku.
They shall fail, oh yes.
by Who Manatee United Against Bots
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by StronVam of Belgium
If not for the fact
that grandma still uses them
I just might do that.
by Grandma can mount her own dildos.
I have an old fashioned jar opener that's got to be almost 100 years old. It still works and has always been in use. Are you thinking of mounting grandma's antique dildo collection?
by Use Lube
Antique furniture.
Grandma's homemade apple pie.
Uncle Joe's porch swing.
by Marilyn Manson
Do you have any antique hand-operated kitchen devices such as cherry-pitters.
If so, do you hang them on the wall, or actually use them?
And was it handed down to you, or did you get it at a garage or estate sale?
And lastly are you pissed off that this is not a haiku or even spam like you expected?
by Tits.
If you don't wear pants
while you are meditating,
you will not crap them.
by I love farting in yoga class.
If you meditate
while you are crapping your pants,
do it in Walmart.
by Your 5 minutes of fame.
Japanese fountain.
Diarrhea yoga mix.
You get the picture.
by Enlightening. of You will be lighter when finished.
If you crap your pants
while you are meditating
you're doing it right
by Downward Facing of Dung
I guess that explains
the litters of figpuppers
(Telling Bob Barker)
by Consolation Prize of Turtle Wax
Never used Kleenex.
Tossed it to the dog next door.
Defenestrated.
by The dog won many blue ribbons for its shiny coat.
Poseknicker poem made me laugh
by Sk of pnw
I want you in me
With enough lubrication
the midget vanished
by I. Hearhim of He must be around here somewhere
You mean to tell me
All those wadded up Kleenex
are for your boogers?
by Darth's Mom of Looking under his bed
I want you in me,
the lion roared with menace
before he ate me.
by Now I'm a lion fart. of They roar from both ends.
I want you in me,
she whispered seductively.
So I picked her nose.
by Darth Poseknicker.
Golden Age of Porn
Dirk Figgpuckler picks his nose
Oh, those Boogie Nights
by Mark of Wallbooger
Golden Age of Porn
Dirk Figgpuckler picks his nose
Oh, those Boogie Nights
by Mark of Wallbooger
Oh Goddess, get stuffed.
Great celestial roast turkey you serve us all. Hail!
by Noble Pagan Praises of Turkey Goddess
Be my meat, oh bird.
Nest within my whole wheat bread.
Leftover goddess!
Just like prostitutes.
Dark or white doesn't matter.
As long as juicy.
by Is it Spanksgiving yet?
When it comes to fowl
I highly prefer turkey.
Perfect for munchies.
by Make me a samich!
At the county fair
Farmer Brown's huge black pecker
got the blue ribbon.
by Exotic poultry competition.
Chickens smoke pot in
a higher pecking order.
Farmer Brown's cookies.
by The cows just moo.
Your job is to eat
and run around and peck things
Have any questions?
by I Was going to ask where the the bathroom is located of But on further inspection , everybody just shits on the floor
Poemotomy.
Me bottom in autumn lobs
poo and poetry.
by Well, actually all year, but some months are better than others.
As the stink from skunks
poetry is secreted
from a lower gland.
by dissecting in literature class
These plates smell like bleach
A bonus for the dishwasher
Thanks for your huge tip
by I. Orderedscrambledeggs of Yelp
If people laid eggs
things would be a lot different
I guarantee that
by Lester Longpig of 24 Hour Cannibal Brunch
Here's Janis naked.
Her brother sold me this pic.
Near forty years back.
by https://www.booksie.com/files/postings/35/428371-202410_MEDIA_IMAGE_.jpg
I did your breakfast.
Scrambled eggs, extra creamy.
I DID your breakfast.
by eggs with eggs
Now I am ready to do my breakfast, when having my breakfast coming again to read more news.
by Larryses of Vietnam
Oh, I thought you would
replace the booger right back
to its origin.
by Scratch & Sniff.
There is a reason
Your nose is far from your bum
God is Good, that's why
by Put a booger in your bum. Fart freely for 2-4 hours of Remove booger. Figpucker homemade chewing gum hack
Food and bowel movements.
In one hole, out the other.
Consumerism.
by I am a product of Bugs Bunny and Gilligan's Island.
There's a solution
Remove the poetry lobe
Sign the dotted line
by Miracles of Science
Bad Haiku Shrink
"Patient writes poems about food"
"and bowel movements"
by Dr. Haiku of Old Willow Mental Hospital
Like the moon and stars,
buttholes are never evil;
they simply exist.
by meditate on that
Talk about tube steak.
Smothered in viscous gravy.
Those chunks aren't giblets.
by Gobble gobble.
My eight inch anus
has impressed many hookers
when they first grab it.
by Thick and juicy!
You speak in riddles
Your butthole can't be evil
Knock Knock, Figpucker?
by Waiting of You ask who's there
Darth published a book!
He published it on Google.
With his own butthole.
by Figpucker the lord of EVIL BUTTHOLES
I seen Figpucker.
He was in that manual
of bowel conditions.
by Gastroenterology of HAIKU
Darth, we LOVE to hear
about your prolapsed anus.
Do tell us some more.
by Stringing Figpucker Along of STRING CHEESE
Wheres's Earth Wormfucker?
Off to chew holes in apples?.
Stuck on a fishhook?
by Whenyawannafuckit Butcanttellwhichendiswhich of Hawaii
I didn't believe
about the earthworm story
Google says it's true
by Anonymous Poet
The other partner
I'm assuming it's the worm.
The worm that's smoking.
by Noticer of What did I just see, Darth?
Have you ever put
an earth worm in your pee hole?
An old native trick.
Great for both partners.
I know you don't believe it.
Go and look it up!
by Chief Running Schlong
Have you ever put
an earth worm in your pee hole?
An old native trick.
Great for both partners.
I know you don't believe it.
Go and look it up!
by Chief Running Schlong