Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
27 Years, 135 Days and 76968 Haiku later...

We will bury you.
First we will liquidate you
With bad haiku (belch)
Haiku # 69462, January 7, 2021 11:54 am ET
by Nikita Khruschev of Shoebanging in B+W
Let us make our stand.
Brothers, let us make our stand
Here, at Bad Haiku
Haiku # 69461, January 7, 2021 11:49 am ET
by Driven to Desperate Measures of Poetry
I gots ta HAIKU.
Y'all don't undastand nuthin.
All about that VERSE.
Haiku # 69460, January 7, 2021 11:48 am ET
by Tyrone of Old Luxembourg
Hang their foul guts high !
Parade their heads all through town!
(Bad haiku writers)
Haiku # 69459, January 7, 2021 11:45 am ET
by Insurrection of Defection Detection
That Tucker Carlson
He will be the first to go
(sharpening my hoe)
Haiku # 69458, January 7, 2021 11:28 am ET
by Haiku Ho Pimp of Sharply Dressed
Gurlz caint have BONERS.
Darth, you done gone plum CRAZY.
Too much Balot eggs.
Haiku # 69457, January 7, 2021 11:26 am ET
by Hillbillary of the Fallacious Philippines
Storm the Bastille!
Send my stimulus check NOW.
(More Dominion votes.)
Haiku # 69456, January 7, 2021 11:23 am ET
by TerraMar Foundation of Ghislaine Prisonbrain
Jest DEEplorabul.
Thass whut are gubbermint is.
We shore is angry.
Haiku # 69455, January 7, 2021 11:21 am ET
by Erudite Knuckle-dragger of PHD in Poli Sci
Bad Haiku News

She had a boner.
Korean hotties dancing.
One hundred one beers.
Haiku # 69454, January 7, 2021 6:43 am ET
by But who's counting?
Ghost peppers are hot,
but Carolina reapers
are freaking deadly.
Haiku # 69453, January 7, 2021 6:22 am ET
by Fire tongue of fire water.
Nipple piercing's gay.
Not as gay as taint piercing.
But pretty damn close.
Haiku # 69452, January 7, 2021 6:18 am ET
by Anything but trashy "fam" tattoos. of Cheap false love, if you know what I mean.
Lol, nice one.
Seriously cracked me up.
But lobster, not pork.
Haiku # 69451, January 7, 2021 6:15 am ET
by Swine are nasty. of Especially here.
Shopper Arrested
Seen stealing expensive cheese
ghost peppers and pork
Haiku # 69450, January 7, 2021 3:27 am ET
by Fuzz Buzz of Phillipines
Grocery Basket
You held it up with your dink
Milk, eggs, bread, ramen
Haiku # 69449, January 7, 2021 3:14 am ET
by Noticer of Details of Undisclosed
Bad Haiku News

-----

Ossoff-Warnock win
Georgia Senate runoff vote
Dems flip the Senate

-----

Partisan vengeance
as Republicans challenge
State Elector votes

-----

Pro-Trump rioters
attack Capitol building
An attempted coup?

-----

4 dead in DC
as Pro-Trump rioters storm
Capitol building

-----

Insurrection fueled
by extremists factions and
conspiracy groups

-----
Haiku # 69448, January 7, 2021 3:12 am ET
by Crimson Mind of Phoenix, AZ
Missed Meetings Craigslist
Saw you out shopping today
Squeezing the melons
Haiku # 69447, January 7, 2021 3:10 am ET
by Noticer of Details of Undisclosed
What was the verdict?.
About the nipple piercings
Is there an update?
Haiku # 69446, January 7, 2021 3:07 am ET
by Noticer of Details of Under old willow
I am still alive.
Expired meat is a myth.
I've ate it often.
Haiku # 69445, January 7, 2021 2:39 am ET
by Dumpster diver association of America. of I ain't neber needed me no ghrahamer no how.
The rain has let up.
Time to go shopping for food.
Milk, yogurt, chicken.

Fruit, ramen, bread, eggs,
and a bunch of other shit.
The list's here somwhere.
Haiku # 69444, January 7, 2021 1:58 am ET
by WAFFLES of TWAT
I have stopped caring.
Some toilets spin left, some right.
Coffee must be strong.
Haiku # 69443, January 7, 2021 1:55 am ET
by Can I change my last name to Funt?
Ozzy-Man Reviews.
Completely nude aerobics.
Ghosts and aliens.
Haiku # 69442, January 7, 2021 1:52 am ET
by You know I'm right.
That feels pretty good
I meant my AK-47
Keep holding my dink
Haiku # 69441, January 7, 2021 12:35 am ET
by Gun Lover of USA!!
give him the tweetment
the prez needs more sedation
and less sedition
Haiku # 69440, January 7, 2021 12:35 am ET
by ash
no trumped up charges
but there is a charged up trump tweeting sedition
Haiku # 69439, January 7, 2021 12:33 am ET
by ash
Drank too much Kool aid
Need to piss like a racehorse
Someone hold my gun
Haiku # 69438, January 7, 2021 12:33 am ET
by Desperado of Urinal
If anyone asks
I'm looking for the bathroom
I'm not with the thugs
Haiku # 69437, January 7, 2021 12:31 am ET
by When I'm nervous of So are my bowels
If anyone asks
I'm looking for the bathroom
I'm not with the thugs
Haiku # 69436, January 7, 2021 12:31 am ET
by When I'm nervous of So are my bowels
You want covfefe?
That's just coffee with covid.
Trump knew all along.
Haiku # 69435, January 6, 2021 10:12 pm ET
by Shut up, put the funt in the cart, and go to the check out lane.
who's that in my house ?
what do you mean both houses ?
it's all covfefe
Haiku # 69434, January 6, 2021 9:05 pm ET
by ash
dethroned man of steal
all your base are not belong
set us up the bomb
Haiku # 69433, January 6, 2021 9:03 pm ET
by ash
Shedding old software
Dependencies means freedom
For this Bad Haiku
Haiku # 69432, January 6, 2021 1:06 pm ET
by Adam
Rainbows, unicorns
Kittens with lazer beam eyes
Everything pink, glitter
Haiku # 69431, January 6, 2021 12:59 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Believe in yourself
Positive affirmations
Have a nice day, friend
Haiku # 69430, January 6, 2021 12:54 pm ET
by Dipshit of Undisclosed
Electrocution
Try deep-fried human being
It tastes like chicken
Haiku # 69429, January 6, 2021 12:45 pm ET
by Sally Vayting of Vat of Hot oil
Four short years ago
House, Senate and President
And now it's all gone.
Haiku # 69428, January 6, 2021 12:14 pm ET
by He drained the swamp for sure
Stop at McDonald's
Spray paint moon with graffiti
Fuck in the back seat
Haiku # 69427, January 6, 2021 7:42 am ET
by Our first date of En route to the sun
I bet Janis has
regrets for making this site
when she reads this shite.
Haiku # 69426, January 6, 2021 5:16 am ET
by Twat waffles, biskitz and groovy.
Where would you go now
if you were able to fly?
Right into the sun?
Haiku # 69425, January 6, 2021 5:13 am ET
by That's what I thought.
Red is my color.
I might let you borrow it.
Until then, hands off.

You shouldn't hate God.
He gave unto us Rainbows.
Without which, no gays.
Haiku # 69424, January 6, 2021 5:10 am ET
by Irridescant effervescant irrelevant elephant
The top ten fleshlights
are made out of human flesh.
Jeffrey Dahmer knew.
Haiku # 69423, January 6, 2021 5:06 am ET
by Dual purpose sex snacks.
Green ejaculate
Generate guacamole
Taco overflow
Haiku # 69422, January 6, 2021 3:55 am ET
by Taco Belle of Drive thru is open
Blow jobs and hand jobs
and Social Security
Do these jobs count? Help!
Haiku # 69421, January 6, 2021 3:51 am ET
by Working myself of To the bone
Consumer Reports
We rate the top ten fleshlights
By Darth Figpucker
Haiku # 69420, January 6, 2021 2:01 am ET
by Ralph Nader getting a blow job of Driving off a cliff ( We're having a great time)
There is no schizm.
These political isms
are all just jism.
Haiku # 69419, January 6, 2021 12:21 am ET
by The dried up wads of Jimi Hendrix, Ralph Nader, and Richard Nixon's dog.
Head on collision
They're all decapitated
Head off collision
Haiku # 69418, January 6, 2021 12:19 am ET
by Noticer of Details of At the scene
Georgia to DC:
Fake Left/Right dichotomy
Prepares US for woe
Haiku # 69417, January 5, 2021 6:26 pm ET
by You Are Brainwashed
Tickle Me Elmo.
Quality control worker.
Doing test tickles.
Haiku # 69416, January 5, 2021 5:43 pm ET
by Bad Dad Jokes, Inc.
I don't want to fly.
I'd much rather teleport.
Is that a thing yet?
Haiku # 69415, January 5, 2021 5:18 pm ET
by It should be!
My nipples aren't peirced.
Should I correct this problem?
What says vhs?
Haiku # 69414, January 5, 2021 5:15 pm ET
by One old fart to another.
Fart, flatus, break wind,
trouser trumpet, contribute
to global warming.

Step on a frog, toot,
reverse belch, burrito ghost,
bleed the pressure valve.
Haiku # 69413, January 5, 2021 5:00 pm ET
by George Carlin of The stage in the sky.
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