The alien glow
side effect of mind control
psychoactive drugs

permeates his skin
intoxicating weak minds
in vicinity.

Wait, that's incorrect.
It's Easy Melt Velveeta.
There's no real dairy.

His blood test came back
100 % fake cheese.
This is the real news.



I'm so hungry I can eat a wagon wheel!
Bang, bang, bang!
Oh! Howdy Partner! Time for Timer!
Do you ever get that hungry feeling after school?
Boy, I do! I'm so hungry, I could eat a wagon wheel!
When I'm slow on the draw and I need something to chaw,
I hanker for a hunk of cheese!
When my ten gallon hat's a-feelin' five gallons flat
I've got something planned, which is
Little cheese sandwiches! Come on!
Here's a great little snack to tide you over till dinner!
If you want something that's delicious and nutritious,
cheese is a super snack! Look! A wagon wheel!
When my get up and go has got up and went,
I hanker for a hunk of cheese!
When I'm dancin' the hoedown and my boots kinda slow down,
Or anytime I'm week in the knees,
I hanker for a hunk of,
A slab, a slice, a chunk of,
A snack that is a winner,
And yet won't spoil my dinner!
I hanker for a hunk of cheese! Ya-hoo!

Paid for by your local dairy association.

Trump's plastic surgeon
mistakenly injected
cheddar, not botox

Please check all tractors.
Then crosswalks, bicycles, cars,
and hydrants. OK.

I'm Hunter's hard drive.
Please stop talking about me.
ALL hard drives matter!

Hunter the Biden
Was a bag man for "big guy"
A very sad sack..

How did the Russians?
Sign Hunter the Biden's name?
on the repair note?

hard drive corruption
graft, pay for play RMB
unseemly photos.

What the hell Hunter?
Look alike Hunter Biden?
Works for KGB?

I love being white!
I am white like milk... and clouds
and fluffy fresh snow

"She had a nice rack..."
You mean those barbecued ribs
Taken from Adam?

Ah aint no ways tahrd.
Basket of deeplorabulz
Got hot sauce right HERE

That Italian girl
From one hundred years ago
had a nice rack.

A Sophia face
with a rear like a goddess
sad- lack of knowledge

Prevented epic
rodgering- well deserved
But she no complain.

Master of stench breath.
Daily light speed booger flick.
Drunken hobo style.

Poet Lofan lives!
Raising spirits of brothers
and weary fighters.

Even- old bastard
can do some type of practice
get yer blood moving

kill your big TV
Get off off the bu hao couch
go to the wood park!

100 ax hand
then drill, crush,pound and cross work.
And maybe Ba gua.

Practice- for decades
not for fighting other ren
works to defend from

Boredom and sloth
becoming phat American
jade stalk weakness.

Practice yer kung fu
For physical alchemy-
so damn hao for you!

a funk drying flux
is the same to a numb clit
and both re-gendered.

That Australian song
From Monty Python: "Right, Bruce"
That one cracks me up.

Sounds like down-under:
Fosters drinkers in the bush
Waltzing Matilda

A Kardashian
is different to a Trump,
but both are "enhanced".

a drunk flying fox
is different to a numbat
but both endangered

you can't spot a quoll
like a papunya artist
spots a paperbark

in any bushfire
stone the flamin' wallabies
a mercy killing

when out of his tree
what can a koala bear ?
more eucalyptus

ornithorhynchus
that fur really fits the bill
moist fashionista

cute marsupial
i'd like to jump in your pouch
so let's go outback

show you my blue tongue
a lounge lizard cyanosed
from drinking flat out

The number of balls
is testicularity.
Mine is seventeen.

Do you think I can
get high on spider venom
like the snake guy does.

I have kangaroo
Named Joey Buttafuoco
He wants to date you

Robert De Niro
If I had a kangaroo
That's what I'd name him

Let's see what's in there
Vegemite, didgeridoo
Kangaroo pocket

Ty-rant-o-sore-ass
Roaring Under Multiple
Personalities.

Beer beer beer beer beer.
Beer beer beer beer beer beer beer.
Beer beer beer beer beer.

Move to Australia.
Kangaroos and gold mining.
Big fucking spiders.

If you don't like it,
you're free to get the fuck out.
This isn't China.

What's this 69?
I'm not a contortionist
What's your sleep number?

That's how they found him
In the fecal position
Sleeping like a log

We ARE Number One.
Whorrendous is Number Two.
(By that I mean Darth.)

The United States
of Goddamn America,
you mother fuckers!

I jerked off watching
the Riemann hypothesis
YouTube videos.

Gives new meaning to
imaginary lovers.
I want to touch them.

Approximately
as long as a stretched out cat
I measured it twice

fucking halloween
it's coming into spring here
false marketing spree

Okay, this is true.
I like to sleep in the nude.
No flannel for me.

Thanks for the thought, though.
But when I wake up and work
vid chats are awkward.

Ð

We'll have flannel sheets
You can eat crackers in bed
Let's mess up your room

You know, I think Darth
writes his best haiku poems
in his pyjamas

I've often wondered
why does Gordon Ramsay take
off his shirt so much.

I would like to eat
camembert and caviar
on low salt Triscuits.

I'm going to poop.
Not really, but let's pretend.
So I can write this.

You know you love it.
Oh wait, It's coming out now.
You see what God did?!

How rude can he be?!
He made crap my britches!
All for this haiku.

After playing God,
God always punishes me.
He can't take a joke!

What a fucking jerk.
He make the platypusses.
Why can't I have fun?!

My room is dirty.
Ants are drawn to spilled coffee.
Sometimes they bite me.

Then I torture them.
That's why I spill my coffee.
So I can play God.