VHS, you young
whippersnapper, it's no fad.
All their gens the same.

Craving bad music,
worse food, throw trash to the wind,
and can't stand reading.

I'm not being rude.
Young and old, it's what they do.
Should I move to France?

I hate apathy.
Maybe more than mosquitoes.
They have both in spades.

DF old friend, now
history must go on, we
fight incompetence

every few gens you
see, sometimes woodstock wins it
sometimes, World War II

I'm not able to
post late night, some technical
tablet issues...see

Is Chivalry dead?
Damn syllables in distress
Jumpstart my haiku?

Teach them Haiku moves
You show up. Dance like Tom Cruise
In Fruit of the Loom

VHS will pay
Top dollar. Haiku scholar.
Recruits drink baluts

I have lost all faith.
Twerking: the new school subject.
Pole dancing is next.

Government sponsored.
They seem to think this is art.
Love the Philippines.

Such a backwards place.
Litter, bad food, pollution,
whores don't use condoms.

If they spent as much money on health care education, and trash pick-up programs and infrastructure as they did on "dancing" in school programs and awards ceremonies for "who has the cleanest fingernails" (or something equally as stupid), it might be a good place to live. Other than that, stay away. Best advice I can give you. Philippines bad. Thailand good. Might pay Korea a visit some day. Korean food kicks ass.

Thailand has come a long way in 20 years. Serious improvements. The Philippines just keeps sinking deeper and deeper into the dark ages. Living there will make you lose all hope in humanity.

Carved our initials
Century old Balete Tree
Put up tire swing

Split. Bite size pieces
Safest way to eat hot dog
(Mega Jumbo size)

The Siquijor whores
selling souvenirs to fend
off evil spirits.

I just laugh and say,
"It doesn't work or else I
would be kept away."

Then they tell me where
I can buy some cooked children.
Gotta love witches.

Needs barbecue sauce.
Other than that it's not bad.
Island of devils.

I want my head pierced.
Steve Martin's arrow, but real.
That would be extreme.

Open heart tattoo.
If you want to prove your love.
Talk about extreme!

Extreme body mod.
Only split end is penis.
Someone tell me why.

He's such a nice guy
He's got the best hair ever
No split ends in sight

Figpucker. Mansion
Truckload of Conditioner
Glad to blow this load

Snaggletooth Blow Job
Breathing new life into old game
Turtle Head pokes out

the old life is gone
the new one will never know
time burns all bridges

*they're... shoot me now.

Tortoises mating.
Parents say that its leap frog.
No, mom, their fucking.

Deadliest of snot.
Exploding monkey boogers.
Bursting zoo windows.

I think I am gay.
I just drank two apple beers.
What's more gay than that?!

There's a huge problem.
It's right down inside my pants.
The back, not the front.

Asleep at the wheel
Chaos! Noise Lights Farts....Steering
Long haul guardrail graze

Semi-Consciousness
Breathing Farts. Having visions
A Back end blow out

Driving and thinking
Mighty strange thoughts. Full Moon.
Practice Thriller Dance

Pissing in a can
Then chuck it out my window
I love truck driving

Whiskey on the floor
Falling for you. Falling apart
Giving you my fart

There's someone I know
Went to Africa said the
Pygmies have great weed

Get Help. Sign up now.
Hair Conditioner Anon
Friend of Vidal S.

Freedom from desire
It irritates some people
I say good riddance

Leftovers from lunch
Bento box spread wide open
Microbes hard at work

Pie on windowsill
Will it attract a hobo?
Or a line of ants?

Sometimes I just wish
I had a huge problem like
The one in your pants

God is watching you
Seen your Amazon Wish List
More conditioner?!!!

Nanny Goat's got goals
Stealing shirts off the clothesline
Bleating, skipping around

The men with huge feet
Will be there soon, as you know
Huge feet and a big....

Feeling organic.
Goat milk granola climax.
Chunky and funky.

God hates us I know.
Cows don't make chocolate milk.
Mosquitoes exist.

well leave them leaves a
bit alone they end up on
the neighbor's yard way

Lazy and ice cold
I just want to be the first
To climb Mt. Haikuji

Witchy Autumn Spell
Wind blow leaves to neighbor's yard
Can't rake them. Too hard.

recipe for love
A bottomless cup of coffee
Topless barista

Standing in line now
Free samples of the worms day
Fly out your way soon

*Fertilized.

*EasterBated

Chocolate Jesus.
This is My Body and Blood.
Cream filled, bite the head.

Eaterbated Peeps.
Fertiled eggs will soon hatch
a Devilish plan.

And finally, this
Wind is blowing my mind off
The thing it sits on

Carrying my phone
Looking cool as fuck all, eh?
Watch me talk on it

Writing my poem
About the new haiku smell
Feeling so lucky

Forecast calls for wind
Blowing straight out of your junk
And out the back end

Tie down the whole street
Seek out cover and good coffee
Wait out this weather

Hair conditioner
We know what you do with it
So, stop it right now

Delicatessen
Genoa hard salami?
Comes with own mayo