Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
28 Years, 46 Days and 77437 Haiku later...

well Leonard Cohen
is not Leonard Nimoy but
we could say jews, both

men, the poet is
Cohen, the writer, singer
logical no doubt
Haiku # 49647, May 6, 2013 11:38 pm ET
by vhs
I am not sure where
I heard the Gesture of those
people of vulcan

was the same gesture
made by rabbis on yom kippur
for their people's sins
Haiku # 49646, May 6, 2013 11:32 pm ET
by vhs
argue if you wish
but if the force is with you
live long and prosper
Haiku # 49645, May 6, 2013 8:16 pm ET
by ash
yeah vulcan turned
into a singularity
was not my style
Haiku # 49644, May 6, 2013 3:52 pm ET
by vhs
I smelled a horse fart.
Glorious reminiscing.
Galloping through grass.
Haiku # 49643, May 6, 2013 1:52 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Team doesn't matter.
Though the new stuff was ruined.
By J.J Abrams
Haiku # 49642, May 6, 2013 11:09 am ET
by Janis
so old or new star
trek, and why does it matter
if it does at all?
Haiku # 49641, May 6, 2013 11:08 am ET
by vhs
grits teeth...spoiled brats need
to sink or swim, because if
spoiled brats are in charge...

2008 all over again
Haiku # 49640, May 6, 2013 11:07 am ET
by vhs
I'm a homework whore.
I solve equations for cash.
Spoiled brats pass math.

A woman told me
that a foot is equal to
twenty-four inches.

Earth is very small.
I would like to see the stars.
To see new planets.
Haiku # 49639, May 6, 2013 11:00 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Yesterday is gone
Today is nearly over
Count your blessings dear
Haiku # 49638, May 5, 2013 11:22 pm ET
by JamieS
god damn, we can't be
cynical without some dumb
fuck with a cell phone

sharing the whole thing
like there's nothing private tell
facebook to fuck off
Haiku # 49637, May 5, 2013 9:33 pm ET
by vhs
sucide by cop
interesting concept, pain is
too much, he shoots you
Haiku # 49636, May 5, 2013 12:44 pm ET
by vhs
Bloody, virgin girl.
Holy dicks, God, what is love?
Paedophilia.
Haiku # 49635, May 5, 2013 11:01 am ET
by oioioioi
do not miss old days
where you had to turn a knob
long live the tv remote
Haiku # 49634, May 5, 2013 10:28 am ET
by ~Roberuto_Renga
election is nigh
pop tarts are overrated
diabeetus knows it
Haiku # 49633, May 5, 2013 10:09 am ET
by ~Roberuto_Renga
corrugated hate
folds upon itself, buttressed
flatten that hazard
Haiku # 49631, May 5, 2013 1:27 am ET
by Lush
torrid vehicle
burning up as she propels
passengers be damned
Haiku # 49630, May 4, 2013 11:50 pm ET
by Lush
dy by dx
anonymous in fuego
light us up, captain
Haiku # 49629, May 4, 2013 11:44 pm ET
by Lush
cordial badinage
vhs on the trigger
ideal rejoinders
Haiku # 49628, May 4, 2013 11:40 pm ET
by Lush
For the down and out
the green grass of Pershing park,
becomes Shangri-La.
Haiku # 49627, May 4, 2013 10:28 pm ET
by mundane
Procrastination.
Prophylactic prolific.
Reverse entropy.
Haiku # 49626, May 4, 2013 8:30 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
My email is:
darthfigpucker@yahoo
dot com but of course.
Haiku # 49625, May 4, 2013 8:23 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
My pen is penis.
Fertile ink wells are sperm cells.
I impregnate you.
Haiku # 49624, May 4, 2013 8:21 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Very soon to be.
Fifty thousand haiku.
Who will be the one?

The Viagra spam
Would be most appropriate.
We could call it art.
Haiku # 49623, May 4, 2013 8:14 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
I'd rather solve a
differential equation
than write a haiku.
Haiku # 49622, May 4, 2013 8:09 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
but of course a kind
word in politics or the
art of writing is

suicide
Haiku # 49621, May 4, 2013 1:10 am ET
by vhs
and it's funny, you're
writing poems condemning
poems that are you know

pretty damn good poems
Haiku # 49620, May 4, 2013 1:09 am ET
by vhs
ha ha ha! I am
the damned, poetry is the
very music of hell
Haiku # 49619, May 4, 2013 1:08 am ET
by vhs
VHS, do this:
Go buy yourself a young wife.
At the Philippines.

You will not be bored.
Your penis will be happy.
Poetry be damned!
Haiku # 49618, May 3, 2013 4:03 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
laughs, I'm waiting for
someone to ask why I haven't
self destructed yet

I'm too fucking lazy
sloth will do the job for me
or my job just will
Haiku # 49617, May 3, 2013 5:06 am ET
by vhs
think about it, this
place beats twitter, short context
more real substance and...

less characters! (most of the time)
Haiku # 49616, May 3, 2013 5:05 am ET
by vhs of I still love janis joplin and sylvia plath
and boy oh boy how
I am hankering for some
hot thai noodles now
Haiku # 49615, May 3, 2013 5:03 am ET
by vhs
as for that "woumb woumb"
is the old vhs broke
eating the casette
Haiku # 49614, May 3, 2013 5:02 am ET
by vhs of haven't killed myself and vow not to
damn it, if you hit
me on the head again to
"get me to run right"

I will tear up your
last copy of that art film
you will hear "woumb woumb"

just as kung pow is
about to beat karate
cow with a good move!
Haiku # 49613, May 3, 2013 5:01 am ET
by vhs of we will never surrender
security code
'twas "favourably onhook"
if only, mon frere
Haiku # 49612, May 2, 2013 11:25 pm ET
by Lush
as for ash, I vow
having lost beloved thrice
chin up, soul forward
Haiku # 49611, May 2, 2013 11:21 pm ET
by Lush
those under twenty
we can safely disregard
for they know nothing
Haiku # 49610, May 2, 2013 11:19 pm ET
by Lush
i'm under thirty
I, like, know everything ya'll
EVERYTHING is modern
Haiku # 49609, May 2, 2013 11:15 pm ET
by Lush
multi stanza'd pomes
defeat the purpose haiku
distill your notions
Haiku # 49608, May 2, 2013 11:13 pm ET
by Lush
newcomers galore
the interweb is replete
oldtimers beware
Haiku # 49607, May 2, 2013 11:12 pm ET
by Lush
pedestrians, ho!
vhs off rails again
upgrade to blu-ray
Haiku # 49606, May 2, 2013 11:10 pm ET
by Lush
damn it greedo, why
do you get the nonsense words
I didn't think of!!!!!!!
Haiku # 49605, May 2, 2013 10:45 pm ET
by vhs
especially the nurse
in latex outfits and I
think she'll see you now?
Haiku # 49604, May 2, 2013 10:44 pm ET
by vhs
humperuficus.
unambiguality.
fapfapfapfapfap.
Haiku # 49603, May 2, 2013 5:28 pm ET
by evi1 of Tatooine Tatoo Parlour
Click on the hot link!
You can buy cheap viagra!
And stay hard all night!

"See a doctor if
your huge erection lasts for
more than 3 hours."

No, I don't think so!
I would rather see the nurse.
Grin, wink, wink, nudge, nudge.
Haiku # 49602, May 2, 2013 12:19 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
you burnt so brightly
yesterday incandescence
leaving today's butt
Haiku # 49601, May 2, 2013 3:14 am ET
by ash
so what tickles your
fancy then eh? party on
wayne? we're not worthy?
Haiku # 49599, May 2, 2013 1:41 am ET
by vhs
this "boring" is what
some people want at some time
in their lives, "boring"

my irish rear end
Haiku # 49598, May 2, 2013 1:40 am ET
by vhs
the world keeps turning
yet even while the sun shines
it's dark in my heart
Haiku # 49597, May 1, 2013 7:32 pm ET
by ash
Oh, I mean, puh-leez!
This is just the internet.
Nothing here transcends.

I would rather be
surfing waves on an tropic
island paradise.

The universe was
made so that I could party.
Poetry is dull.

Poems attempt to
fill a gap like throwing sand
in the Grand Canyon.

The gap is not filled.
You will never be happy.
Words are just useless.
Haiku # 49596, May 1, 2013 2:07 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
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