Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
27 Years, 312 Days and 77281 Haiku later...

yeah vulcan turned
into a singularity
was not my style
Haiku # 49644, May 6, 2013 3:52 pm ET
by vhs
I smelled a horse fart.
Glorious reminiscing.
Galloping through grass.
Haiku # 49643, May 6, 2013 1:52 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Team doesn't matter.
Though the new stuff was ruined.
By J.J Abrams
Haiku # 49642, May 6, 2013 11:09 am ET
by Janis
so old or new star
trek, and why does it matter
if it does at all?
Haiku # 49641, May 6, 2013 11:08 am ET
by vhs
grits teeth...spoiled brats need
to sink or swim, because if
spoiled brats are in charge...

2008 all over again
Haiku # 49640, May 6, 2013 11:07 am ET
by vhs
I'm a homework whore.
I solve equations for cash.
Spoiled brats pass math.

A woman told me
that a foot is equal to
twenty-four inches.

Earth is very small.
I would like to see the stars.
To see new planets.
Haiku # 49639, May 6, 2013 11:00 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Yesterday is gone
Today is nearly over
Count your blessings dear
Haiku # 49638, May 5, 2013 11:22 pm ET
by JamieS
god damn, we can't be
cynical without some dumb
fuck with a cell phone

sharing the whole thing
like there's nothing private tell
facebook to fuck off
Haiku # 49637, May 5, 2013 9:33 pm ET
by vhs
sucide by cop
interesting concept, pain is
too much, he shoots you
Haiku # 49636, May 5, 2013 12:44 pm ET
by vhs
Bloody, virgin girl.
Holy dicks, God, what is love?
Paedophilia.
Haiku # 49635, May 5, 2013 11:01 am ET
by oioioioi
do not miss old days
where you had to turn a knob
long live the tv remote
Haiku # 49634, May 5, 2013 10:28 am ET
by ~Roberuto_Renga
election is nigh
pop tarts are overrated
diabeetus knows it
Haiku # 49633, May 5, 2013 10:09 am ET
by ~Roberuto_Renga
corrugated hate
folds upon itself, buttressed
flatten that hazard
Haiku # 49631, May 5, 2013 1:27 am ET
by Lush
torrid vehicle
burning up as she propels
passengers be damned
Haiku # 49630, May 4, 2013 11:50 pm ET
by Lush
dy by dx
anonymous in fuego
light us up, captain
Haiku # 49629, May 4, 2013 11:44 pm ET
by Lush
cordial badinage
vhs on the trigger
ideal rejoinders
Haiku # 49628, May 4, 2013 11:40 pm ET
by Lush
For the down and out
the green grass of Pershing park,
becomes Shangri-La.
Haiku # 49627, May 4, 2013 10:28 pm ET
by mundane
Procrastination.
Prophylactic prolific.
Reverse entropy.
Haiku # 49626, May 4, 2013 8:30 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
My email is:
darthfigpucker@yahoo
dot com but of course.
Haiku # 49625, May 4, 2013 8:23 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
My pen is penis.
Fertile ink wells are sperm cells.
I impregnate you.
Haiku # 49624, May 4, 2013 8:21 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Very soon to be.
Fifty thousand haiku.
Who will be the one?

The Viagra spam
Would be most appropriate.
We could call it art.
Haiku # 49623, May 4, 2013 8:14 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
I'd rather solve a
differential equation
than write a haiku.
Haiku # 49622, May 4, 2013 8:09 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
but of course a kind
word in politics or the
art of writing is

suicide
Haiku # 49621, May 4, 2013 1:10 am ET
by vhs
and it's funny, you're
writing poems condemning
poems that are you know

pretty damn good poems
Haiku # 49620, May 4, 2013 1:09 am ET
by vhs
ha ha ha! I am
the damned, poetry is the
very music of hell
Haiku # 49619, May 4, 2013 1:08 am ET
by vhs
VHS, do this:
Go buy yourself a young wife.
At the Philippines.

You will not be bored.
Your penis will be happy.
Poetry be damned!
Haiku # 49618, May 3, 2013 4:03 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
laughs, I'm waiting for
someone to ask why I haven't
self destructed yet

I'm too fucking lazy
sloth will do the job for me
or my job just will
Haiku # 49617, May 3, 2013 5:06 am ET
by vhs
think about it, this
place beats twitter, short context
more real substance and...

less characters! (most of the time)
Haiku # 49616, May 3, 2013 5:05 am ET
by vhs of I still love janis joplin and sylvia plath
and boy oh boy how
I am hankering for some
hot thai noodles now
Haiku # 49615, May 3, 2013 5:03 am ET
by vhs
as for that "woumb woumb"
is the old vhs broke
eating the casette
Haiku # 49614, May 3, 2013 5:02 am ET
by vhs of haven't killed myself and vow not to
damn it, if you hit
me on the head again to
"get me to run right"

I will tear up your
last copy of that art film
you will hear "woumb woumb"

just as kung pow is
about to beat karate
cow with a good move!
Haiku # 49613, May 3, 2013 5:01 am ET
by vhs of we will never surrender
security code
'twas "favourably onhook"
if only, mon frere
Haiku # 49612, May 2, 2013 11:25 pm ET
by Lush
as for ash, I vow
having lost beloved thrice
chin up, soul forward
Haiku # 49611, May 2, 2013 11:21 pm ET
by Lush
those under twenty
we can safely disregard
for they know nothing
Haiku # 49610, May 2, 2013 11:19 pm ET
by Lush
i'm under thirty
I, like, know everything ya'll
EVERYTHING is modern
Haiku # 49609, May 2, 2013 11:15 pm ET
by Lush
multi stanza'd pomes
defeat the purpose haiku
distill your notions
Haiku # 49608, May 2, 2013 11:13 pm ET
by Lush
newcomers galore
the interweb is replete
oldtimers beware
Haiku # 49607, May 2, 2013 11:12 pm ET
by Lush
pedestrians, ho!
vhs off rails again
upgrade to blu-ray
Haiku # 49606, May 2, 2013 11:10 pm ET
by Lush
damn it greedo, why
do you get the nonsense words
I didn't think of!!!!!!!
Haiku # 49605, May 2, 2013 10:45 pm ET
by vhs
especially the nurse
in latex outfits and I
think she'll see you now?
Haiku # 49604, May 2, 2013 10:44 pm ET
by vhs
humperuficus.
unambiguality.
fapfapfapfapfap.
Haiku # 49603, May 2, 2013 5:28 pm ET
by evi1 of Tatooine Tatoo Parlour
Click on the hot link!
You can buy cheap viagra!
And stay hard all night!

"See a doctor if
your huge erection lasts for
more than 3 hours."

No, I don't think so!
I would rather see the nurse.
Grin, wink, wink, nudge, nudge.
Haiku # 49602, May 2, 2013 12:19 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
you burnt so brightly
yesterday incandescence
leaving today's butt
Haiku # 49601, May 2, 2013 3:14 am ET
by ash
so what tickles your
fancy then eh? party on
wayne? we're not worthy?
Haiku # 49599, May 2, 2013 1:41 am ET
by vhs
this "boring" is what
some people want at some time
in their lives, "boring"

my irish rear end
Haiku # 49598, May 2, 2013 1:40 am ET
by vhs
the world keeps turning
yet even while the sun shines
it's dark in my heart
Haiku # 49597, May 1, 2013 7:32 pm ET
by ash
Oh, I mean, puh-leez!
This is just the internet.
Nothing here transcends.

I would rather be
surfing waves on an tropic
island paradise.

The universe was
made so that I could party.
Poetry is dull.

Poems attempt to
fill a gap like throwing sand
in the Grand Canyon.

The gap is not filled.
You will never be happy.
Words are just useless.
Haiku # 49596, May 1, 2013 2:07 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
I want to write words
poetry, transcendant that
sort of thing really...
Haiku # 49595, May 1, 2013 1:05 pm ET
by vhs
I'm not kidding how
I feel, what I want is real
I feel I need out

I need to be free
so I can no longer post here
and leave this all behind
Haiku # 49594, May 1, 2013 1:04 pm ET
by vhs
Silly vhs
anything here is a joke
there are no death threats.

I am the owner
of a nuclear warhead.
No, really, it's true!

You see what I mean?
This is just silly nonsense.
And I eat boogers.
Haiku # 49593, May 1, 2013 12:57 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
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