Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
28 Years, 15 Days and 77389 Haiku later...

Lick tears from her neck
Taste of perfume, ambergris
She weeps for dead whales
Haiku # 34792, March 4, 2006 9:06 am ET
by Brady of Toronto
They use mind control
They're making me paranoid
Don't say you don't know
Haiku # 34791, March 4, 2006 8:44 am ET
by Brady of Toronto
All respect to Ash
He
Haiku # 34790, March 4, 2006 7:10 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Got text from Lorna
She is in Barcelona
Eating tapas, wine
Haiku # 34789, March 4, 2006 7:03 am ET
by William Nippress
don't make me blubber
ripe cetacean tragedy
ship it to japan
Haiku # 34788, March 4, 2006 5:05 am ET
by ash
Washed up on the shore
a smell only dynamite
could rid. whale go boom!
Haiku # 34787, March 3, 2006 10:13 pm ET
by Betty LeBomb
Washed up on the shore
a petrified beach party
grab a bone for luck!
Haiku # 34786, March 3, 2006 10:06 pm ET
by Betty LeBomb
Stones on a wet beach
glint and gleam in the moonlight.
Petrified bubbles.
Haiku # 34785, March 3, 2006 6:59 pm ET
by beach life
I
Haiku # 34784, March 3, 2006 6:44 pm ET
by Mad Ken of AAAAAHHHHH!!!!
I don
Haiku # 34783, March 3, 2006 6:41 pm ET
by Mad Ken
This is relaxing,
I could write haikus all day.
Haiku # 34782, March 3, 2006 6:40 pm ET
by Mad Ken
In the library,
I make a noise like a chimp.
Grin among the frowns.
Haiku # 34781, March 3, 2006 6:36 pm ET
by Mad Ken

the smell of burning
leather; we hold each other
tight; don't touch me there


-- apologies to The Tubes
Haiku # 34780, March 3, 2006 5:45 pm ET
by Crimson Mind of Phoenix, AZ

latex gown and gloves
a teenage enema nurse
in stiletto heels
Haiku # 34779, March 3, 2006 5:41 pm ET
by Crimson Mind of Phoenix, AZ
Judging by my weight
Sitophobia is not
One of my problems
Haiku # 34778, March 3, 2006 5:38 pm ET
by Crimson Mind of Phoenix, AZ
A bit horny, eh?
Hornblower, Horatio
Gives fellatio.
Haiku # 34777, March 3, 2006 5:00 pm ET
by Lush
Interesting thought
Why do I find naked girls?
So dam attractive
Haiku # 34776, March 3, 2006 12:23 pm ET
by Perhaps I
My friend Caroline
Has just got her PHD
Now Dr Metcalf
(Criminology)
*
Asked me to join her
Sorounded by us old men
for a drink lunch time
*
All looking at her
With soft eyed adoratioin
She is just so cute
*
She
Haiku # 34775, March 3, 2006 11:58 am ET
by William Nippress
nerves have now collapsed
ignorance working its art
carved an empty corpse
Haiku # 34774, March 3, 2006 10:45 am ET
by Kiralli of Berkshire Hills
site burning
ni-pressed and ashen
only remains
Haiku # 34773, March 3, 2006 8:36 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
When she smiles at you
The rest of the world disappears
No man could resist
Haiku # 34772, March 3, 2006 7:39 am ET
by William Nippress
she was a sugeon
but you just couldn't cut it
ah well, break a leg
Haiku # 34771, March 3, 2006 5:54 am ET
by ash
My old mate Richard
Beautiful Nathalie Said.
Take me to the dance.
*
He could not say no
She
Haiku # 34770, March 3, 2006 5:36 am ET
by William Nippress
comet pojmanski
blowing in the morning sky
bite me tsar bomba
Haiku # 34769, March 3, 2006 5:18 am ET
by ash
Last one was about
My Dog, lest you get ideas
Vet did it not me
Haiku # 34768, March 3, 2006 5:13 am ET
by William Nippress
Finger up his bum
Look of surprise on his face
His anal glands squeezed
*
He looked straight at me
What the hell! Look on his face
I just had to laugh
Haiku # 34767, March 3, 2006 5:11 am ET
by William Nippress
My dogs got a cyst
At least that
Haiku # 34766, March 3, 2006 5:01 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
My dogs got a cyst
At least that
Haiku # 34765, March 3, 2006 5:00 am ET
by William Nippress
What
Haiku # 34764, March 3, 2006 4:58 am ET
by William Nippress
older all the time
undulating chromosomes
in a death spiral
Haiku # 34763, March 3, 2006 4:55 am ET
by ash
amputation now
the leg is off poor wee dog
a bucket's on her head
Haiku # 34762, March 3, 2006 2:35 am ET
by mellie
My poor powdered dog
an urn holds him after time
took old Blue away
Haiku # 34761, March 2, 2006 11:55 pm ET
by Betty LeBomb
Oh sweet powdered drugs
Makes the bad feel oh so good
Takes the blues away
Haiku # 34760, March 2, 2006 5:20 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Dash the FDA
Even koalas get high
Gimme, gimme drugs
Haiku # 34759, March 2, 2006 4:19 pm ET
by Lush
Dangling from a cliff
Tired, sweating, death is near
I dream of big tits
Haiku # 34758, March 2, 2006 2:23 pm ET
by Kackarott of L.A.
One thing is for sure
On the internet no one
Knows if you're a dog
Haiku # 34757, March 2, 2006 1:12 pm ET
by Janis
A girl with coffee
Sent it spraying all over
When he made a joke.
Haiku # 34756, March 2, 2006 12:57 pm ET
by Ryan of Korea
I know who you are
You little punk ass dipshit
Spam in haiku form
Haiku # 34755, March 2, 2006 12:54 pm ET
by Janis
Novaya Zemlya.
Late on a Monday morning,
Ivan celebrates.
Haiku # 34754, March 2, 2006 11:33 am ET
by 57 megatons of biggest ever

London Happy Hour
Let's share the Underground dear
A lovely Plenge in River Styx
Heavenpointed Domes are blasted anyway
Bacchus Red made of Grapes
Haiku # 34753, March 2, 2006 8:04 am ET
by wosky
Mangled poetry,
Devoid of form and beauty,
I suck at this stuff.
Haiku # 34752, March 2, 2006 7:32 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Ok so what then
You
Haiku # 34751, March 2, 2006 7:04 am ET
by http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Castle_Bravo
Shaken and not stirred
The name is Bond, James Bond
Sean Connery is Bond.
Haiku # 34750, March 2, 2006 5:43 am ET
by Alan Lawton of Earth
Read the submissions
Hilarious, more mad Ken
And more from Annon
Haiku # 34749, March 2, 2006 5:35 am ET
by William Nippress
Ok, I hear you
Enough, enough, just relax
Just get over her!
Haiku # 34748, March 2, 2006 5:29 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Attracted to her
Always thought she was lovely
Close to her, I
Haiku # 34747, March 2, 2006 5:26 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Her smile haunts me
Her slim figure alluring
Captivates my soul
Haiku # 34746, March 2, 2006 5:21 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
A real cense of loss
Of hopelessness and despair
I know it can
Haiku # 34745, March 2, 2006 4:53 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Christ love is painful
When it is unrequited
My heart is aching
Haiku # 34744, March 2, 2006 4:50 am ET
by Anonymous Poet

















Do clouds in the sky
Ever get tired floating
So high above us?
Haiku # 34743, March 2, 2006 4:48 am ET
by Alan Lawton of California
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