Just gotta feel it
This is bad haiku anyway
Don't try so damn hard.

Head for five dollars
Sorry ho I don't do tricks
I gets mine for free

Not sure I can do
Too new at this Haiku lark
Show me what you mean

One too many
What a damn mess I've made here
Negligence is mine.

Buttered up them thighs
Open wide lonely housewife
Therapy's in session.

No value statements
Haiku must cut like a blade
Drop the dualism

Too much abstraction
Use words of the everyday
No philosophy.

Frowning scarecrow laughs
Enraptured hungry black crows
Take the farmers dance

Conjunctions don't work
Keep them to a minimum
Kill self consciousness

Steer clear of gerunds
Turn haiku into big mess
Always here and now

Modifiers suck
Makes for clumsy jumbly prose
Must be crisp and clean

Peasant

Oh toilet scrub brush
Let the Lord's song be with thee
Wash it all away.

Greasy icy rocks
Boasting dirty oceans crash
Earths waste putrefies

The problem I see here
Bad haikus trying to be good
They fail miserably.

Solitary path
A songbird shatters stillness
Lame Buda stumbles

Deliverymen smirks
Bridegrooms supplicate disturbed
Caught with his pants down

Infinite number
Of monkeys with infinite
Number typewriters
.
Was said of Shakespeare
Tempting, but my stuffs poor crap
No Shakespeare am I

Best not touch my beer
Or my sausages or I'll
Get CCTV

I came home to cook
As I have much work to do
But all! All my pans!!

The bloody cleaners
First they move my stuff around
And now it's not there

Infinite number
Of monkeys with infinite
Number computers
That is what I think
Nippress has working for him
Oh his haiku farm

Flashing coal dark eyes
Lips of strawberry murmurs
Loves hot desires

High mountain rescue
In case you didn

Phantom gatekeeper
Gloating snowy carnivore
Norfolk

Names to strike terror
Ascent imagination
Shrieking devils quake

yikes nippleless
he's going down for the count
and many others

Norfolk

Mountains flouting death
Icy meandering wind
Roaring unbroken

Faintly impatient
Feathers floating aimlessly
Gloomy storm drain laughs

Sharp barren gray peaks
Call Norfolk mountain rescue
Lofty climbers lost

Don

Apologies all
I saw the spelling too late
But now know there

Fish with a shotgun
Comes out to get its revenge
Goes on a rampage

the lad drophammer
skids along same passages
shitty description

I miss bung daddy
sometimes I really miss him
not very often

death is forever
no talk of chocolate please
until after lent

take a hint please will
observe the reset button
use it more often

goddamnit nippress
let me spell it out for you
GIVE OTHERS A CHANCE

i remember love
distant grayscale reflections
gone and all but lost

the warm egg salad
looks different on the way out
more green, less salad

there are other faiths
with symbols for forever
the cross is of death

mung launching clench hole
spray splatter chunky drippings
puddle on the floor

I shot a fish with a shotgun
There are pieces every where
Fondue fish pieces

A chocolate cross for Easter
No other thought is so horrid
Eating the symbol of Eternity

Shoot the hand that bleeds
It changes your soul at a price
Killing has mercies

Jesus was holding
the little atheist girl
or just Barry Gibb?

"solder go to war"
fuses metal together
back in the toolbox

Nippress, remember:
quality not quantity,
trite does not make right

Drums tugging the heart
Camouflaged weapons armed
Solder go to war