We were gonna fight
blood on his Drew Carey face
dumb whore asked who won

Eggs on his gross teeth
big Drew Carey looking queer
his dead cat went "rrreeeeaa"

failed referendum
lacking sound constitution
justly euthanased

Working my sac off
for 37 long years
makes me say this shit

Juicey placentas
trickle down off the legs edge
as more life is born

Another fallen tear
drying the dust
and
and
and

life is a drive through
rolling hills dividing the
pastures of laughter

Ert tricklations
of anticoagulent
nasalments exude

Jackson said "Beat It"
I learned my lesson too well
Sequined gloves don''t work!

Giving up so soon?
Why the temp here is so nice!
Rake I must, Damn you!

KACKAROTT,open
let me slide my fat cock in
I know you want it

Kackarott, I have
read them all...you need some help
YOU REALLY ARE GAY!!!!

Red Heads have red hair
Those poor bastards, some are queer.
Jake you fuckin queer

Bloody tear stained face
He screams "THIRD PAIR OF GLASSES!"
Holding rocks... i smirk

See the small flower
Stretching to reach the sunbeams
Please, don`t step on it

My neoprene pants
Keep me warm underwater
And prevent shrinkage

Ahoy giant snail
Walking with your single foot
Leavng one footprint

Glazed in my mischief,
She smiled and said, your not Greg
and she promptly fled

I listen hard when
Art says, "What a dream I had..."
If There Was Such Love...

Come back happy, Come
back happy, Come back happy
Klegem, Klegem, Kleg

forks like a wishbone
handlebars like a moustache
mangled motorbike

And so today my
world it smiles, your hand in mine
we walk the miles, Thanks

Years of what iffs drown
In an effervescent pool
Of marriage doldroms

Rolling Too Conscious
Endless Nights of Sleeplessness
I Miss Suzy Q

Michelob Golden
Shameless plug for the beer that
I most love to chug

Fuck Sparrows and Snails

I''d rather be a
bulldog than a bone, yes I
would, but not for good.

Left Handed Communists?

...so, Simon says to
Garfunkel, "which hand do you
use to... ? Nevermind."

I tried to write a
sonnet, but I couldn''t feel
it. I like Haiku.

Jeremy Remy
Big old hairy pubic thatch
He is my hero

kenneth extension
watches too much tv, but
oh, what else to do?

Hewn from an ingot
Is this timepiece of the gods
And it doesn`t tick

Tell me Jennifer
Which part of the word "Haiku"
Don''t you understand?

so slow the server
haiku remains beyond sight
greyness on the screen

bimbos and haiku
a real dangerous combo
menage e'' twathole

Carefull with scissors
Chop that big seventies bush
OUCH! knicked the right one

My name is Peggy Sue,
His name was Johnny Lou.
Our love was very new
We didn''t know what to do.

It was summer of ''67
I thought I''d died and gone to heaven.
I thought I liked Kevin, but
I''d just broke up with a boy named Devi

Youth inserts penis
Into freshly baked dessert
Good job it`s not hot

Big sharks run amok
In Poseidon Adventure
Where''s Ernest Borgnine?

I see dead people
But it''s hardly surprising
I''m a mortician

Working like a dog
Can make you very tired
More money for booze

Haiku Paradox:
The more sincerely you try
The worse crap you write.

Thunder Stork I know
You are far away from home
Fear not, young Jedi

Tried to skate in town
Skateboard stopped, I forgot to
Stupid sidewalk cracks

The 3 Stooges Beer
Moe, Larry, Curly, not Shemp
Make wonderful brew

The scab starts to form
Over wounds I never had
Aching deep inside

I say kill the fuck!
Your bike is an extension
of your own being.

so they found the bike
although it was a bit bent
not unlike myself

Got to take a dump
Hey doggie, fetch the paper
This might take a while

indian mynahs
building that nest yet again
know death awaits you

stolen motorbike
the toy i used to possess
revs up someone else