Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
27 Years, 351 Days and 77336 Haiku later...

As I said earlier
Children might read these haiku
So don't use bad words
Haiku # 25605, January 17, 2003 3:37 pm ET
by A Student of Manchester
I read the words here,
and I wonder to myself,
Have too much free time?
Haiku # 25604, January 17, 2003 3:31 pm ET
by Ray of Garner
I saw a lady,
Said "Nice Shirt, Let's Fuck", smiling,
Bitch slapped my left cheek.
Haiku # 25603, January 17, 2003 3:29 pm ET
by Ray of garner
The dog runs around,
in circles, like he's crazy.
A planet orbits.
Haiku # 25602, January 17, 2003 3:28 pm ET
by Ray of Garner
I too, did your wife.
I hope it was before you,
as I ate her box.
Haiku # 25601, January 17, 2003 3:26 pm ET
by Ray of Garner
I too mounted your wife
I hope it was before you,
as I ate her crotch.
Haiku # 25600, January 17, 2003 3:22 pm ET
by Ray of Garner
The list can eat shit,
For art is but on mans crutch.
Art Carney is dead.
Haiku # 25599, January 17, 2003 3:20 pm ET
by Ray of Garner
Told the wife last night
Gonna mount her dry gray box
Lube it with my puke
Haiku # 25598, January 17, 2003 3:18 pm ET
by onjaysun
Who cares whose dog barks?
We cannot control the dog,
Just control our shit.
Haiku # 25597, January 17, 2003 3:16 pm ET
by Ray of Garner, NC
Drank to much last night
Fought with the neighbors and friends
"That is not my shit!"
Haiku # 25596, January 17, 2003 2:57 pm ET
by onjaysun
if I make myself
a damned soap opera, what
gives is bad acting
Haiku # 25595, January 17, 2003 1:16 pm ET
by Mox
I just want it all
to end, send all your bad thoughts
my way, does the rest
Haiku # 25594, January 17, 2003 12:43 pm ET
by Mox
My attorney, D.
Duck might not have any briefs
but I'll stick with him.
Haiku # 25593, January 17, 2003 12:29 pm ET
by onjaysun vs. onjaysun
New nursing home aide
Taught them to do the Kick Worm
Unacceptable
Haiku # 25592, January 17, 2003 12:13 pm ET
by Luke Duke of Boston, USA
I ran out of glue
Peanut butter is sticky
And convenient
Haiku # 25591, January 17, 2003 11:58 am ET
by Luke Duke of Boston, USA
Exam tomorrow
Oh no, not on saturday
Right, I'm off to watch...
Haiku # 25590, January 17, 2003 8:58 am ET
by A Student of Manchester
Bad language is in
These bad programmes and it sets
A bad example
Haiku # 25589, January 17, 2003 8:56 am ET
by A Student of Manchester
Violent crime in
Europe is lower than here
Oh I wonder why
Haiku # 25588, January 17, 2003 8:55 am ET
by A Student of Manchester
Britain and U.S.
Show violence but not the
Great beauty of love
Haiku # 25587, January 17, 2003 8:54 am ET
by A Student of Manchester
But a large amount
Of nudity and beauty
That's better than death
Haiku # 25586, January 17, 2003 8:53 am ET
by A Student of Manchester
Everyone should be
More like the europeans
No death on TV
Haiku # 25585, January 17, 2003 8:52 am ET
by A Student of Manchester
underneath layers
when you peel them carefully
there are more layers
Haiku # 25584, January 17, 2003 8:17 am ET
by ash
anglosaxon words
might sound quite naughty to you
but they're words to me
Haiku # 25583, January 17, 2003 8:13 am ET
by ash
you may have a point
which i cannot comprehend
but fucked if i know
Haiku # 25582, January 17, 2003 8:08 am ET
by ash
What profane language
Can not be more eloquent
When spoke with clean tongue?
Haiku # 25581, January 17, 2003 8:06 am ET
by A Student of Manchester
without censorship
one person's profanity
is another's verse
Haiku # 25580, January 17, 2003 7:19 am ET
by ash
Have scotch in my bed?
I have some scotch by my bed
The whisky, that is
Haiku # 25579, January 17, 2003 6:17 am ET
by A Student of Manchester
deep in winter's grip
we slip into flannel sheets
where we create heat
Haiku # 25578, January 16, 2003 8:35 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
rocks are much too hard
i recommend you have scotch
in your bed instead
Haiku # 25577, January 16, 2003 8:09 pm ET
by scotch of as a nightcap...you know
i saw two of three
second "Lord" did not equal
though first was ok.
actually, though
it wasn't so bad if you
allow for translate.
Haiku # 25576, January 16, 2003 7:10 pm ET
by sheena
wow, i'm the sixteenth
on prolific poets list?
but ash still ruleth.
Haiku # 25575, January 16, 2003 7:07 pm ET
by sheena
Look at PEF
Is it not a perfect three
Letter summation
Haiku # 25574, January 16, 2003 7:04 pm ET
by A Student of Manchester
scotch, can i have a
triple on the fucking rocks?
please? thanks very much.
Haiku # 25573, January 16, 2003 7:04 pm ET
by sheena
since i was ruthless
i should expect no quarter
but i wish i did...

since i was unmoved
he's not held to it
it's my selfishness

that makes me want to
keep what i did not
earn the right to have.
Haiku # 25572, January 16, 2003 7:02 pm ET
by sheena
some three letter words
are much more irritating
than four letter ones
Haiku # 25571, January 16, 2003 7:01 pm ET
by scotch
But just how many
Of my haikus featured the
letters PEF?
Haiku # 25570, January 16, 2003 6:58 pm ET
by A Student of Manchester
this site's had death threats
rape threats, forgery, slander...
not to mention pef
Haiku # 25569, January 16, 2003 6:57 pm ET
by scotch of fucking bad haiku
I'm number twenty
On the list of haikuers
I should get out more
Haiku # 25568, January 16, 2003 6:57 pm ET
by A Student of Manchester
As the internet
Becomes more available
Foolish children in
Pushchairs will learn to
Use internet browsers and
Come across such sites
Haiku # 25567, January 16, 2003 6:54 pm ET
by A Student of Manchester
We should rise above
Such abuse and live in peace
Like Mr T says
Haiku # 25566, January 16, 2003 6:53 pm ET
by A Student of Manchester
perhaps the answer
is to keep kids in pushchairs
away from this site
Haiku # 25565, January 16, 2003 6:52 pm ET
by scotch of fucking bad haiku
What society is
This in which young children use
Terms of abuse
Haiku # 25564, January 16, 2003 6:51 pm ET
by A Student of Manchester
I heard a young child
In a pushchair with his mum*
Utter the term "fuck"
*Obviously his mother was not in the pushchair
Haiku # 25563, January 16, 2003 6:49 pm ET
by A Student of Manchester
and as we all know,
kids who don't know those "bad words"
are loved by their peers
Haiku # 25562, January 16, 2003 6:35 pm ET
by scotch of the fucking office
Bad language is bad
Hence the bad in bad language
Children might see it
Haiku # 25561, January 16, 2003 5:38 pm ET
by A Student of Manchester
fuck off moxie
Haiku # 25560, January 16, 2003 5:00 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
The logic of a shrub:
Kill the arabs now
They have arranged marriages
With other people
Let them have freedom
And marry other members
Of their family
Haiku # 25559, January 16, 2003 4:45 pm ET
by A Student of Manchester
"Saddam had warheads?
"How can a war have a head?"
"Just attack him, sir."
Haiku # 25558, January 16, 2003 4:42 pm ET
by A Student of Manchester
my hat's off to you,
onjayson, for showing class
hey, who stole my hat?
Haiku # 25557, January 16, 2003 4:36 pm ET
by scotch of (punctuation styles never lie...well, occasionally, but not often)
Basketball Jones I
Got a Basketball Jones oh
Baby oooh eeeee oooh
Haiku # 25556, January 16, 2003 3:41 pm ET
by onjaysun
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