do not speak until
the day''s eyes flutter open
and tongue-crud is scraped
by Anonymous Poet
the inventor of
shoes must once have trod upon
fresh turds left by dogs
by Anonymous Poet
The glass ain''t half-full
Neither is it half-empty.
The milk is sour.
by Scrunty Hardbody
just cos i can type
i will send in this haiku
and a thousand more
by ash
aspect ratio
flatters my slim empennage
i fly like a bird
by ash
It was a fine day and I hit a website
www.badhaiku.com
I submitted and I cried
by Shuvro of Seattle, USA
I wrestle for kicks
With Conga Eels in a tub
The kids sure like it
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
The magic number
Is three, or so I''m informed
It''s remarkable
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
I tattooed myself
With a chainsaw and some paint
It says "I love Mnnnfp"
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
I broke my joystick
By waggling it too roughly
Is there a moral?
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
Microwave ovens
Heat food using microwaves
Now that`s a fact Jack
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
That sneaky trumpet
Dribbled warmly down my thigh
PVC pants, yeah!
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
tea and cucumber
sandwiches and debutantes
jaw clenching, "thanks mom"
by secret of another instructional video, will be the end of us all!
If it''s Saturday
It must be Sao Paolo
Or at least Cardiff
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
I am a viking
I have two enormous horns
Stuck on my helmet
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
When masticating
Please, try to keep your mouth closed
Else the food falls out
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
Is the glass half full?
Or is it just half empty?
Who cares? Bring more beer.
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
I pushed a pencil
Up my nose to sharpen it
Now I use crayons
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
just got out of bed
a new day nods its welcome
but first, take a whiz
by Anonymous Poet
Matt Stone, Trey Parker.
They are such clever buggers.
I just thought I''d say.
by Scrunty Hardbody
when the dog explores
her tail wags, her eyes light up
bugs are edible
by chris
Charging like bunnies,
with windswept ears and sharp teeth
Kiss my ass, Copper!!
by Fruity
Real Hot and Shiny
Like a bucket of chicken
Hey Fruity!! Look there!
Lumbering uphill
Back-tits making a sine wave
There!! It''s a fat guy!!
Gee, I wonder if
He could eat a whole roast pig
maybe a baby.
by Fruity
warm borborygmi
gurgling deep in my gizzard
preludes to a fart
by ash
a long way from home
a whole continent removed
sorry. no punch line.
by chris
on the sea of dreams,
asleep, adrift and carefree,
dog''s butt in my face
by chris
dinoflagellates,
unicellular zoa,
cute little fuckers
by chris
server connection
takes forever and a day
time to take two dumps
by chris
Puta que pariu
Vai tomar no cu
Filho duma puta!
by Aluyzyus of Oz,
made my peace with God
at least I hope it was God
I was really drunk
by Hollywood Bonfire
dreamt my dick could talk
it had a nice crisp accent
like Sean Connery''s
by Hollywood Bonfire
I showed them I care
when my group missed the deadline
I feigned a seizure
by Hollywood Against The Machine
Great pools of jism
Covers the streets like treacle
Yes, it''s raining men
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
A big oval comes
In the sky with the eclipse
Oops, I mean elipse
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
Water pouring down
From the sodden atmosphere
Just like God`s wee wee
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
Shifty artisans
Wreak havoc with their hammers
Come, let us bite them
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
I have no kitchen
Yet I must cook some kievs
Hey, pass that candle
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
''Yeah, shag baby, yeah.''
If one more person says that
I''ll kill them. I will.
by Scrunty Hardbody
Grotesquely painted
They climb the stairs together
I hide in cupboard.
by Scrunty Hardbody
Grotesquely painted
They climb the stairs together
I hide in cupboard.
by Scrunty Hardbody
damn that hollywood
because he stops submitting
if he is happy
by ash
there is nothing worse
than great expectoration''s
vile phlegmatism
by ash
If they spoke English
oh how they would laugh, up there
high on Mount Titlis.
by Scrunty Hardbody
I sat in my car
Guttermouth played loudly
Man, do I feel Fucked
by amanda of seattle , usa
''you''ll be glad you did''
that is what it said up there
my heart feels sorrow
by manic bartender
in my own office
I sit on my lazy ass
monkey, keep typing!
by manic bartender
footprint shaped poodle
Japanese man is screaming
oh no,is Godzilla!
by manic bartender
Jimmy Kimmel and
Adam Corrola say to
eat sticks of butter
by manic bartender
well, it''s almost time
return to college dammit
I eat the raw beans
by Infinity
It gets pretty sore
If you play with it too much
Then it all goes numb
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
