Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
28 Years, 62 Days and 77460 Haiku later...

divide into teams
each team works on its own line
don't let them mingle
Haiku # 16354, October 18, 2001 5:13 am ET
by scott (this is how they wrote the killer joke, i believe...saw it in a documentary)
i foam at the mouth!
is it the dreaded anthrax?
no, it's just colgate
Haiku # 16353, October 18, 2001 4:57 am ET
by scott (anyway, i suspect this ain't the ronin who was posting when i started...)
it's a sad mistake
to ascribe this all to me
a comforting lie

i do wish you peace
i once enjoyed your haiku
back when you wrote it

wearing masks like this
you can't know the face beneath
guess we never will
Haiku # 16352, October 18, 2001 4:35 am ET
by scott, oh well...i tried (y me gustar
can only work on
one letter at a time, saw
two once and got sick

ok lamer and lamer time for bed
Haiku # 16351, October 18, 2001 4:27 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
I am working on
a death haiku that, when read,
will kill the reader.

I mean why not?

Haiku # 16350, October 18, 2001 4:24 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
I see these things!
the haiku apparitions
shiver my fingers
Haiku # 16349, October 18, 2001 4:21 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
I see these things!
the haiku apperations
shiver my fingers

Haiku # 16348, October 18, 2001 4:20 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
ronin crouches; and
pokes at the squares with letters,
his HANDS are ugly.
Haiku # 16347, October 18, 2001 4:06 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
sweat sodden bedding,
night of sputtering apnoea,
he stinks of himself,

light spiking crusty eyelids,
he wills himself alive, yet
wishes to be dead
Haiku # 16346, October 18, 2001 4:00 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
ladies you know not
what you are missing, ronin
has started to drool
Haiku # 16345, October 18, 2001 3:44 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
as i type this ku,
ronin slumbers, noisily
farting and belching
Haiku # 16344, October 18, 2001 3:42 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
ronin urine,
buddhafields of stupor, void
of all contentment


Haiku # 16343, October 18, 2001 3:32 am ET
by pigdog - that one was too good not to fess up to
ronin urine,
buddhafields of stupor, void
of all contentment
Haiku # 16342, October 18, 2001 3:30 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
ronin t'ain't an anus'
ronin t'ain't a nutsack, so
ronin is a taint
Haiku # 16341, October 18, 2001 3:25 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
ronin drunk again
his family shuns him, so
so he twits and twitters
Haiku # 16340, October 18, 2001 3:22 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Unconceding butthead
go suck on satan's hole and
fill your head with shit.

(don't forget the dots)
Haiku # 16339, October 17, 2001 11:38 pm ET
by ciao!
canadians....third rate?
true... i couldn't agree more
but what of aussies?
Haiku # 16338, October 17, 2001 11:13 pm ET
by k.k.k.

.....ahhh, unconceding fool
i'd squish you like a cockcroach
........and die like kafka
Haiku # 16337, October 17, 2001 11:07 pm ET
by ronin

cheese soul food, you say
how about a reverse kick
.right smack in your face

(and a double roundhouse
....reverse strike more)
Haiku # 16336, October 17, 2001 11:02 pm ET
by ronin

.....feed on anthrax scott
maybe you'd be more pretty
.....frothing at the mouth
Haiku # 16335, October 17, 2001 10:55 pm ET
by ronin

......and what of you ash
do you choose to hide behind
......inconspicious names
Haiku # 16334, October 17, 2001 10:53 pm ET
by ronin

...veritable fruitcakes
diagnosed as schizoidal
..roam free in this site
Haiku # 16333, October 17, 2001 10:49 pm ET
by ronin

que quieres, fuckhead
.tu no hablas espanol
.....eres tu puto
Haiku # 16332, October 17, 2001 10:45 pm ET
by ronin

..with bloodshot red eyes
he vaguely attempts to talk
....but his brains is fried
Haiku # 16331, October 17, 2001 10:41 pm ET
by ronin

..the guy's brain is fried
sucked dry of all its juices
..he simply stares blank
Haiku # 16330, October 17, 2001 10:39 pm ET
by ronin

.......grilled skewered ap
from one end of his shit head
.........to the other end
Haiku # 16329, October 17, 2001 10:35 pm ET
by ronin
..so what's the big deal
if you're fucking canadian
..a third rate white race

..(go stuff your ass with
.........foul cheese)
Haiku # 16328, October 17, 2001 10:32 pm ET
by ronin
coincidence? already?

anthrax went to the
senate one; dubya twat holds
most expendable

in case it had him
actually killed: even
odds: kowtow demos.
Haiku # 16327, October 17, 2001 10:32 pm ET
by unconceding

...i would smash his face,
push it down the toilet bowl
....and kick his damn ass
Haiku # 16326, October 17, 2001 10:30 pm ET
by ronin

............satan is passe
.but here he's like something big
...where have you been wags

(ahhh, so many lifeyears behind)
Haiku # 16325, October 17, 2001 10:27 pm ET
by ronin

.......satan is a fart
...you all idolize a fart
coz you're scared of fart

(ahem...an old, old fart)
Haiku # 16323, October 17, 2001 10:07 pm ET
by ronin
i'm hitting refresh
but no refreshment follows
bug in the browser?
Haiku # 16322, October 17, 2001 8:31 pm ET
by scott
The attack of the
killer dildoes!!! flying steely dans
imperial sex toys...
Haiku # 16321, October 17, 2001 8:10 pm ET
by Jerry
there's cheese in a can.
there's also string in a can.
both taste similiar.
Haiku # 16320, October 17, 2001 7:37 pm ET
by scott (can you can-can?)
i have shaved my head
my scalp now reflects the sky
birds hover and preen
Haiku # 16319, October 17, 2001 7:10 pm ET
by scott (orthodox)
poor mox is dead yeahhhh!!!
I killed him with my stolen
dildo site haiku.....
Haiku # 16318, October 17, 2001 7:10 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
cheese IS soul food, ehh?
up here cheese is THE soul fool,
I AM Canadian
Haiku # 16317, October 17, 2001 7:08 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
cheese IS soul food, ehh?
up here cheese is THE soul fool,
I AM Canadian
Haiku # 16316, October 17, 2001 7:08 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Could somebody teach
Moxie how to do haiku,
so she'll do one right?
Haiku # 16315, October 17, 2001 7:07 pm ET
by Nacho Master
we choose bad haiku
rather than good poetry
we like cheese more than soul food
Haiku # 16314, October 17, 2001 6:56 pm ET
by pesce di oro
moxie is dead, so
long live VipVop, dude who knows
good, bad haiku
Haiku # 16313, October 17, 2001 6:08 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
we select some rules.
others rules we disregard.
basho laughs at us.
Haiku # 16312, October 17, 2001 6:06 pm ET
by scott...thinking
sexual erm -
Emergency Response
Mother Fucker
Haiku # 16311, October 17, 2001 6:05 pm ET
by moxie
The nature is not
here, here is haiku for the
f'n digital age.
Haiku # 16310, October 17, 2001 5:41 pm ET
by Nacho Master
a higher standard!
well, that makes haiku harder.
and where's the nature?
Haiku # 16309, October 17, 2001 5:33 pm ET
by ""
the trick, i have found,
is to just use single quotes
but thanks for the link
Haiku # 16308, October 17, 2001 4:40 pm ET
by badhaikuboy@yahoo.com
Your haikus all suck
Each phrase should be just one line
Don't carry over
Haiku # 16307, October 17, 2001 4:19 pm ET
by VipVop
there are goat droppings
to fertilize the barley
under the green mulch
Haiku # 16306, October 17, 2001 3:12 pm ET
by scott@...
before a breakthrough
it's often necessary
to hit rock bottom
Haiku # 16305, October 17, 2001 3:11 pm ET
by scott
I just want to go
no kidding, use this name
if you like...
Haiku # 16304, October 17, 2001 2:23 pm ET
by Jerry
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