Bashō says something unhelpful
Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
29 Years, 326 Days and 78454 Haiku later...
lung recipient
coughed up the donor's sputum
after the transplant
Haiku # 1412 ↗ March 24, 1999 11:43 pm ET
by ash
some years ago now
offended my best friend's dad
i puked in his shoes
Haiku # 1411 ↗ March 24, 1999 11:39 pm ET
by ash
Everyone my
age is getting married. What
the fuck's wrong with you?

No, I will not go
Out with you. I refuse to
fuck a damn Canuck.
Haiku # 1410 ↗ March 24, 1999 2:08 pm ET
by Mommy
the bald-headed girl
kicked my ass quite savagely
when I killed her cat
Haiku # 1409 ↗ March 24, 1999 1:05 pm ET
by Hollywood Bonfire
I just lost my job
as a joke I put some squirrels
in my boss's car
Haiku # 1408 ↗ March 24, 1999 1:02 pm ET
by Hollywood Bonfire
oh mutant orange
small heads screaming as I peel
to scrotum's texture
Haiku # 1407 ↗ March 24, 1999 1:00 pm ET
by Hollywood Bonfire
anyone girl fromwant to go out please email me
Haiku # 1406 ↗ March 23, 1999 10:33 pm ET
by alex of toronto, canada
Procrastination.
Don't judge: it's either that or
Masturbation. Damn.
Haiku # 1405 ↗ March 23, 1999 11:57 am ET
by Captain Speedy of Well, bites
I appreciate
you best when you're far away.
Was that too honest?
Haiku # 1404 ↗ March 23, 1999 11:55 am ET
by Captain Speedy of Hmm, What?
My tattoo itches.
I want to scratch it, but can't.
Oh, the suffering.
Haiku # 1403 ↗ March 22, 1999 11:25 pm ET
by paprfoldr of Amerika
sure, repeat yourself
damned verbal pinball machine
inside my noggin
Haiku # 1402 ↗ March 22, 1999 9:05 pm ET
by bakai
She dropped her panties.
Fat folds and fur looked like she'd
sat on a squirrel.
Haiku # 1401 ↗ March 22, 1999 1:15 pm ET
by Intern
infuriating
i've reached saturation point
downpour please no more
Haiku # 1400 ↗ March 22, 1999 1:26 am ET
by ash
again and again
like onions from lunch repeat
like summer t.v.
Haiku # 1399 ↗ March 21, 1999 10:07 pm ET
by ash
you've heard that before
now u can say that again
echolalia
Haiku # 1398 ↗ March 21, 1999 10:03 pm ET
by ash
echolalia...
is it perseveration
or just d
Haiku # 1397 ↗ March 21, 1999 1:51 am ET
by bakai
Wrote a bad haiku
About your honey blonde hair
Then shit grand black beaned turds
Haiku # 1396 ↗ March 20, 1999 7:46 pm ET
by Mommy
echolalia
with my perseveration
i could repeat it
Haiku # 1395 ↗ March 20, 1999 2:05 am ET
by ash
Lies, betrayal. Whore
Not enough? Wants hunnert grand
Fuck you, bullets cheap!
Haiku # 1394 ↗ March 20, 1999 12:16 am ET
by Lightning of gawd
Gone, gone, evil bitch
dog cock grin; immense burden
Want cash? Take bullet!
Haiku # 1393 ↗ March 20, 1999 12:10 am ET
by Harvester of Eyes of Gommorrah,
Told boss, "I won't sign
your sex harassment form", and
rubbed it in my crotch.
Haiku # 1392 ↗ March 19, 1999 9:50 am ET
by Intern
I hope y2k
goes berserk. We could all use
a common crisis.
Haiku # 1391 ↗ March 19, 1999 8:54 am ET
by Intern
once warmed by the fire
his happiness means despair
for some bad haiku
Haiku # 1390 ↗ March 18, 1999 5:50 am ET
by ash
As I stand bent down


Waiting for the explosion


that which is Denissons
Haiku # 1389 ↗ March 17, 1999 11:18 pm ET
by Taylor Linquist of Medford, United States of America
Sent me to Torrance
Sexy Chicken says Borrance
I have abhorrance! FUCK U
Haiku # 1388 ↗ March 17, 1999 8:35 pm ET
by King of the Ducks of Glendale, United Shits
We, Sons of Nippon
Salute YOU KAMIKAZI
YELLOW LEPRACHAUNS!
Haiku # 1387 ↗ March 17, 1999 6:56 pm ET
by johnny waddtora! tora! begorraugh!, green emerald isle
My bologna has a first name
Frankfurters look like dicksSo I named mine Frankie.
Haiku # 1386 ↗ March 17, 1999 5:59 pm ET
by P.J. Soles of Sherman Oaks, 91423
My first haiku sucks
Goddamn hippo is a slut
Die Ms. Nobel, die!!
King of the DucksGlendale, USGAY
Haiku # 1385 ↗ March 17, 1999 5:58 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Hi! I am garfieldI live in a minefieldI love to play in baseball fieldAlso I love the word FIELD
Haiku # 1384 ↗ March 17, 1999 1:58 pm ET
by garfield of zooland, Garfield-Nation
I love yahoocoz it says hoo hoo hooMy love where are youwind is flowing loo loo loo!
Haiku # 1383 ↗ March 17, 1999 1:50 pm ET
by Zunglee of forest, Amazon
Press on that button
until it pops and poops good
now, i lost my balls
Haiku # 1382 ↗ March 17, 1999 10:41 am ET
by JIM of JIM, JIM
something clicked in place
and I'm happy to be here
thank god for this day
Haiku # 1381 ↗ March 16, 1999 3:08 pm ET
by Hollywood Bonfire
Shot five large loads in
my entrance to the chili
cook-off at work. Mmmmm
Haiku # 1380 ↗ March 16, 1999 10:02 am ET
by Intern
At last you were there
Right before my very eyes
Can we break the tie?
Haiku # 1379 ↗ March 15, 1999 8:19 pm ET
by AHHT
dumb politicians
making those same promises
i fell for last time
Haiku # 1378 ↗ March 15, 1999 6:38 pm ET
by ash
while she is sleeping
i can pull on her nipple
looks like mt. fuji!
Haiku # 1377 ↗ March 14, 1999 5:21 pm ET
by johnny waddpalookaville, estonia
broken wine bottle
in my bloody hip pocket
fucking leprachans!
Haiku # 1376 ↗ March 14, 1999 4:59 pm ET
by johnny waddpalookaville, unitos estatos
Double Amputee
Picking Scabs and Drinking pee
Humming, "Doe Ray Me"
Haiku # 1375 ↗ March 14, 1999 4:53 pm ET
by johnny waddpalookaville, usa
There's SPAM in my fridge
It's been there for several years
I think it's alive
Haiku # 1374 ↗ March 14, 1999 2:32 pm ET
by Jreg of Silver Spring, United States
Shaveing it barren
tchy, bald, bleeding pecker
very stupid idea man
Haiku # 1373 ↗ March 14, 1999 10:40 am ET
by mikefool usa
unlike addition
counting isn't all that counts
regarding haiku
Haiku # 1372 ↗ March 14, 1999 5:24 am ET
by ash
There is nothing like
Wet gummy bears sticking
To your genitals
Haiku # 1371 ↗ March 13, 1999 11:55 am ET
by Jerry of Westfield, USA
Half of entries not
Haikus you foolish people
five, seven, five, duh!
Haiku # 1370 ↗ March 13, 1999 11:37 am ET
by Gwynhyvar of Westfield, USA
Computer hates me
Fatal Errors everywhere
Throw it out window
Haiku # 1369 ↗ March 13, 1999 11:33 am ET
by Gwynhyvar of Westfield, USA
If I could do as I wish,
Iwould acknowledge more profoundlythe sorrow of departing winter.
by Musui
Haiku # 1368 ↗ March 12, 1999 11:38 pm ET
by mark
tears in the kitchen
an empty cast iron pan
strong fucking onions
Haiku # 1367 ↗ March 12, 1999 10:40 pm ET
by Thunder Stork
god I love nature
checking out the squirrels' asses
while making nut jokes
Haiku # 1366 ↗ March 12, 1999 9:39 am ET
by Hollywood Bonfire
good god it's friday
I see my kids this weekend
those fucking ingrates
Haiku # 1365 ↗ March 12, 1999 9:27 am ET
by Hollywood Bonfire
Font size is too big
Must change it or I'll go mad
HTML fools
Haiku # 1364 ↗ March 12, 1999 12:40 am ET
by AHHT
I'm going upstairs
To scrounge a few cans of beer
Before they're all gone
Haiku # 1363 ↗ March 12, 1999 12:39 am ET
by AHHT