BAD HAIKU - Horrible poetry for the digital age
22 Years
195 Days
and
64886 Haikus
later...
Important Message
Near Far wherever you Are
My fart must go on
Haiku #61119, by On and on and on of Republik of Skidmark
November 27, 2018 4:44 pm ET

There is no Hell place
So don't sweat the small stuff, dude
Just play with yourself
Haiku #61118, by Anonymous Poet
November 27, 2018 3:00 pm ET

Do you mean Dante?
He was obsessed with Satan.
Whatever sells, eh?

I should read his work.
Would be good to pass the time.
As I wait for hell.

A book I enjoyed.
Satan: His Psychotherapy and Cure
by The Unfortunate Dr. Kassler, J.S.P.S.
Haiku #61117, by df
November 27, 2018 5:05 am ET

When in third grade,
I'd shit in other kids' pants.
Then make them wear it.
Haiku #61116, by
November 27, 2018 4:55 am ET

If the penis dies,
but the testicles live on,
what's the point of that?
Haiku #61115, by
November 27, 2018 4:51 am ET

Elvis had a twin
He wasn't an orange dork
With a bunghole mouth
Haiku #61114, by Anonymous Poet
November 27, 2018 2:05 am ET

One hand in pocket
Other one is...Wait, I'm nude!
That ain't a pocket
Haiku #61113, by Alannis Morisette of Canudia
November 26, 2018 10:38 pm ET

Weird World of Haiku
Sentenced to hard labor here
Could use a Snickers
Haiku #61112, by Anonymous Poet
November 26, 2018 10:36 pm ET

I remember you
Used to be the janitor
I'm a poet now
Haiku #61111, by Former Janitor
November 26, 2018 9:27 am ET

I always enjoyed coming up behind other kids at the urinal and grabbing them and moving them around, making them piss all over the place. Janitors loved me, I'm sure.
Haiku #61110, by df
November 26, 2018 3:16 am ET

Then in the fourth grade
Heather had a crush on Vic
She peed on his shoe
Haiku #61109, by Anonymous Poet
November 26, 2018 12:52 am ET

I was in third grade
Kid next to me shit his pants
Turned them inside out
Haiku #61108, by Me of Memory Lane
November 26, 2018 12:51 am ET

Bend all the way down
Now push out with your rectum
Now clean up the shit
Haiku #61107, by Simon Says
November 26, 2018 12:49 am ET

When he falls asleep
I order pizza and wings
On his credit card
Haiku #61106, by John Boy Walton's Mole of Cheek
November 26, 2018 12:47 am ET

The brain is dying.
Not from lack of oxygen,
from too much haiku.
Haiku #61105, by df
November 25, 2018 11:53 pm ET

What is poetry?
Is it the sound of my fart?
Or is it the smell?
Haiku #61104, by Anonymous Poet
November 25, 2018 11:02 pm ET

No Poets Allowed
No Poets Allowed, I said.
No Poets Allowed
Haiku #61103, by Anonymous Poet
November 25, 2018 11:01 pm ET

Pubic Hair Salon
Genital tumbleweeds roll
"We do coiffs and queefs"
Haiku #61102, by Smegward Sciissorhands
November 25, 2018 9:00 pm ET

have you read the poems
where Satan has three heads
and one mouth chews Judas
Iscariot for eternity????
Haiku #61101, by vhs
November 25, 2018 8:29 pm ET

poetry is for
the last chance of expression
of the hopeless the

haiku is the suicide
poem of the samurai...
Haiku #61100, by vhs of this isn't a haiku but I am tired of life today
November 25, 2018 8:24 pm ET

So who listened to
Alice's Restaurant this
last Thanksgiving day?
Haiku #61099, by Anonymous Poet
November 25, 2018 7:12 pm ET

Listening to AC/DC conjures up images of being shat upon by Satan whilst chained under his outhouse and he's having constipation and screaming, picking the scabs from a VD sore and flicking them down on top of you with the massive piles of shite at the very lowest level of hell.
Haiku #61098, by Anonymous Poet
November 25, 2018 7:10 pm ET

Dingleberry pie.
Just like grandma used to make.
Fresh from the oven.
Haiku #61097, by df
November 25, 2018 7:06 pm ET

Mona Lisa's cunt
Vertical smile mystery
Obvious tuna
Haiku #61096, by Leonardo of Hard on Department
November 25, 2018 6:42 pm ET

Zorg Zeguulon Zerr
Zygorx Zxrog zzzis zeguulon
Zguyx zx Zorg Zerr
Haiku #61095, by Zorg of Zeguulon
November 25, 2018 6:39 pm ET

Don't bother worry
That's just a waste of your time
Jerk off instead, man
Haiku #61094, by Anonymous Poet
November 25, 2018 6:27 pm ET

Zoom lens on asshole
Wrinkles. Hairs. Dingleberries.
I'll s(h)it on your face
Haiku #61093, by Zygorx of Sgrunx
November 25, 2018 6:14 pm ET

Awful twat waffle.
Eyeful of Eiffel Tower.
Fine wine art cheese fart.
Haiku #61092, by df of French fried frog fritters fraternity
November 25, 2018 5:04 pm ET

Haiku licks my ASS.
You are a lightweight ass-lick.
Do your best. Lightweight.
Haiku #61091, by Ass- cheeks of Transcedence
November 25, 2018 5:00 pm ET

Now you will read this.
Now you will acknowledge Truth
Or burn forever.
Haiku #61090, by Haiku condemns you out of time & money
November 25, 2018 4:44 pm ET

I will end Haiku.
You will lick my abstract ass.
You have no values.
Haiku #61089, by Ass Suck of Poetic Innovation
November 25, 2018 4:37 pm ET

John Podesta is
a total criminal and
Now he stands accused.
Haiku #61088, by Haiku of Ass-suck
November 25, 2018 4:32 pm ET

do i miss you much ?
even though you can't hear me
i certainly do
Haiku #61087, by ash
November 25, 2018 3:29 am ET

I'll start a website.
DarthFigpuckerNude dot com.
For true fans of mine.
Haiku #61086, by df
November 24, 2018 11:30 pm ET

The site is broken
It keeps cutting off my words!
Somebody! Please help!
Haiku #61085, by The owner of Vancie (Adam)
November 24, 2018 9:22 pm ET

*But, she
Haiku #61084, by Vancie
November 24, 2018 9:21 pm ET

Thank you, Starkitten!
Vancie is really happy
But, she
Haiku #61083, by Vancie
November 24, 2018 9:19 pm ET

Long pig twat waffle
Mosquito pork worms cuntfart
Skateboard cranium
Haiku #61082, by Figpucker Fanclub
November 24, 2018 6:24 pm ET

Vancie, you be good
It's hard not being naughty
Let me scratch your belly
Haiku #61081, by Vancie' friend, Starkitten
November 24, 2018 5:51 pm ET

Haiku.
Haiku #61080, by Anonymous Poet
November 24, 2018 10:08 am ET

Vancie is a dog
She is very very black
And she is a brat
Haiku #61079, by Vancie
November 24, 2018 10:06 am ET

Shimmy was a cunt
He stole our rolls of pennies
And bought tons of weed
Haiku #61078, by Rippin
November 24, 2018 4:23 am ET

Larvae puparium
Squidnick Centurion
If I named new cars
Haiku #61077, by Hi Koo
November 24, 2018 4:21 am ET

Radiating pain
into the neck from the brain
will make one insane.

Grabbing a handful
of synthetic opioids
like they were candy.

I'd rather grab tits.
Since I'm no politician
that would be okay.
Haiku #61076, by farty pants poopie face... or something
November 24, 2018 2:46 am ET

All are poetasters
And useless Turkey Basters
Yeah, and time wasters
Haiku #61075, by Outer Spacester
November 23, 2018 5:22 pm ET

Those aren
Haiku #61074, by Anonymous Poet
November 23, 2018 6:16 am ET

You might be the one
The greatest haiku poet
You
Haiku #61073, by Haiku Freak
November 23, 2018 6:12 am ET

Still at the table
They ate until their pants burst
Compared genitals
Haiku #61072, by I'd rather not say of Under the table
November 22, 2018 10:22 pm ET

We're having tacos
Believe me, there is no "Hell"
Some of us know that
Haiku #61071, by Anonymous Poet
November 22, 2018 7:39 pm ET

If you can't give thanks
Then burn in hell, ungrateful.
Haiku has no worth.
Haiku #61070, by Anonymous Poet
November 22, 2018 6:55 pm ET