That's not a problem.
I often have my pants down.
I should wear a kilt.
by But I effing can't stand bagpipes.
The SpaceX Raptor
Rocket engines burn methane.
Great minds stink alike.
by I wish my last name was Musk. of I'd be extra stinky. Deodorant is like soooo last year.
It'll happen fast.
You'll get caught with your pants down.
Like that Pompeii dude
by echo of lavatory
Uh oh, we're all doomed.
It was inevitable.
I just hope it's fast.
by You'll see.
That wasn't Jesus.
Christ doesn't have a Great Dane
It was Shaggy Doo
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest
Jesus spoke to me.
He said I should forgive you.
Then He changed His mind.
by He sees all!
Are you horrible?
If not, would you like to be?
If so, then prove it.
by Pics or it didn't happen.
For high blood pressure
beat up some homeless people
and take their money.
Do it six p.m.
They'll have lots of cash by then.
And you can get drunk.
by Follow me on twiiter for health advice and extra income opportunities.
Darth's secretary
I could fill this position
and a few others
by Flexibility of double jointed (polydactyl)
fractalized anus
got the old blood pressure game
keeping me eyes on.
by vhs
Have you watched Elmo?
I mean REALLY watched Elmo?
He's a dirty prick!
by Noticer of Muppets
Uninvited guest.
Latte art competition.
Porno caffeine swirls.
by First prize!
Brownian motion
dictates the zeros of the
Riemann conjecture.
Sat nude on scanner.
Digitized my hairy ass.
Fractalized anus.
Colors cycling.
Ate some LSD and watched.
Brownian motion.
by Star Kitten understands.
I am going to poop.
When I'm done I'll wipe and flush.
Then tell my parents.
by Big Boy
Kim Kardashian
had sex with Joe Biden's son
and now she's pregnant.
by Walter Crankite
Bad haiku is Truth.
The rest is lies and fake news.
Stay well- informed here.
by Walter Cronkite of B&W TV with 6 channels
World New Through Haiku.
Better than the crap on Fox.
And CNN too.
by But we need more info on the Kardashians and who they are sleeping with. of The important stuff.
Ghislaine's trial begins.
Submarine lady's defense:
"I own the high seas"
by Lock The Mossad Agent Up !
PornHub variant.
Your leaky videos leaked.
But no one will watch.
by Ewwww!
Omigod Variant:
makes girls text emoticons
LOL / SMILEY
by Epsilon of Upsilon
Leftover variant,
Spread by transgender turkeys.
Be VERY scared, NOW.
by Endless Variations of Variants (brought to you by PFIZER)
Time to get out there
and spread my insanity
to the real world now.
by Air borne mad cow. of The bovitrooper variant! Oh no!
"Omicron"?! Really?!?!
It's a fucking Transformer.
Or a transgender.
by What happend to epsilon through xi? of Why did we just jump through the Greek alphabet? Can't even go in order. How stupid are we now?
It all depends on
how long you will keep in the
freezer, delicious.
by Hannibal Lecter
I want someone to
See me and see someone worth
Keeping forever.
by Cat of Sun
How bout the gizzards?
Did you have pumpkin pie, Darth?
Darthvember darthteenth
by Rezkitten of Rez
Can we just agree
that turkey and dressing rule?
What do you all say?
by Darth Pilgrim
They will not prevail.
God did not intend for us
to live online. Nope...
by There Will Be An Event of Biblical Significance
this is such a weird
interconnected group of
internet people
like, this is so niche
and we always disagree
on like everything
by cursedmints of love you guys?
I wish I could fly
but they painted me up here
I'd shit on your heads!
by Spokesgull of Seagulls Against Poetry
I found a bottle
It contained an ancient message...
Hey, go fuck yourself...
by Ebb of Tide
Yeah, Zuckerberg and
Bezos are worst of the worst.
We should live online?!
by This future is really looking awful. of By the way, watch the new South Park.
I like when you preach
against the technocracy
whoever you are.
by I'm With You 100% On This One of Bezos Zuckerberg's Mommy
Squirrels beat rats. Yep.
Nothing like dead sewer rats
flattened in the street.
by Manila
Well, I guess for once
it's good that we did not have...
umm... Scotch on the rocks.
by Rum is better anyway.
All these tech giants
thrive off disconnectedness
and fear of the world.
Giants like Gates, Jobs,
Musk, Zuckerberg, Bezos, and
the evil Janis.
by Ahem.
did not have right gear
needed longer static ropes
but my anchor held
by scotch of not dead yet
yeah! love that album
undeservedly obscure
gets zero airplay
by scotch
yeah! love that album
undeservedly obscure
gets zero airplay
by scotch
Listen: Bridge of Sighs
will reveal knowledge to you.
Please listen to it.
by Thank You, Sincerely: R. Trower
I am so fucked-up
that I need to interact
with lost souls right here.
by Modern Life Has Failed Me
I love nobody,
except those who post haiku
here at the crossroads...
by Fell Down on my Knees at the Juncture of the Crossroads
so when i lose my
temper, lost my glasses when
do i find myself?
by vhs
Bad troll! Bad! No no!
No internet porn today!
Now say you're sorry!
by I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. So terribly sorry.
Should I f*** squirrels?
Animal experts say no.
I do anyway.
by Squirrel Whisperer of I whisper in their ears fun things to do with nuts.
Left over stuffing.
Turkey broth with fat skimmed off.
My God, it's heaven!
by Don't forget the giblets!
Should I feed squirrels?
Animal experts say no.
I do anyway.
by Squirrel Boss
What's on "smart TV"?
Grey's Anatomy drama.
Bizarre use of "smart".
by Alexa, add organic koala bear tampons to my shopping list.
Keurig coffee cunts.
Modern abominations.
Horrible flavor.
by This is the future??? of Send me back to 1990 please.
In my next life I'll
dumpster dive all of my food
and live underground.
by "Zero footprint." of I admire those eccentric old fuckers.
