Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
25 Years, 15 Days and 73970 Haikus later...

Just do more shopping!
Go buy lots more stuff online.
Spend and heal the world!
Haiku # 73911, November 25, 2021 10:22 pm ET
by World Peace Through Frenzy of Shopping in a Stupor
Black Friday: rayciss.
It should be called "White Friday"
to halt injustice.
Haiku # 73910, November 25, 2021 10:18 pm ET
by So Shut Up and Buy on 26th of November for Racial Reconciliation
China may attack
While we sleeping off turkey.
Wake up! Go shopping!
Haiku # 73909, November 25, 2021 10:14 pm ET
by Xi Pinjing of C.C.P.
Butt potter in my gravy...
And then I eat pie-kin pump.
Medicinal WHAT?
Haiku # 73908, November 25, 2021 10:08 pm ET
by Pump up the Jam of Rasberry
South Park? Oh forsooth.
Sir, must you be so vulgar?
Haiku is high art.
Haiku # 73907, November 25, 2021 10:05 pm ET
by Lofty Heights of Fart Jokes
Okay, let me guess.
Pot butter in your gravy.
And your pumpkin pie.
Haiku # 73906, November 25, 2021 10:01 pm ET
by Medicinal, right? of I didn't inhale.
My muse talk turkey.
Then she serve me apple pie.
My muse get me high.
Haiku # 73905, November 25, 2021 9:59 pm ET
by Incorrect Third-person Cojugations of My Whoop-ass Muse
The new South Park rocked.
And you won't guess what happened!
That kid Kenny died.
Haiku # 73904, November 25, 2021 9:59 pm ET
by You should watch it.
Thanksgiving's OK...
But bad haiku is the BOMB.
It blew up my muse.
Haiku # 73903, November 25, 2021 9:56 pm ET
by She Was Inflatable, thus sort of Relatable
What up VHS
I am in Moxieland now...
The way life should be.
Haiku # 73902, November 25, 2021 9:53 pm ET
by Ayuh Wicked Good of Finestkind
Darth ate balot egg
Stuffed with live turkey and drugs.
Tryptophan deluxe.
Haiku # 73901, November 25, 2021 9:51 pm ET
by Plimoth Pharmacy of 1620
Happy thanksgiving
To elect haiku remnant.
"I am the turkey".
Haiku # 73900, November 25, 2021 9:48 pm ET
by Dig My Wattles of Shimmy Shimmy Shake and make a sandwich next day
Call me Robot Frost
Stopping to crap in your forest
My horse think's you're queer
Haiku # 73899, November 25, 2021 9:19 pm ET
by Deepdank Woods of Rural Porn Star
It's snowing cocaine
Look how productive I am.
Poetry Robot
Haiku # 73898, November 25, 2021 9:15 pm ET
by Clunk of Junk

who gets the gizzard?
settle this once and for all
who gets the wishbone?
Haiku # 73897, November 25, 2021 9:12 pm ET
by Cassowary not of Casseroles
China will kill us.
China will kill the planet
for communism.
Haiku # 73896, November 25, 2021 7:23 pm ET
by More greedy than capitalists.
cup of coffee 7
pm, snow already? well
here we go again...
Haiku # 73895, November 25, 2021 6:45 pm ET
by vhs of and so it goes.
Devil Artemis
turned Perfect Cell into an
antihero with Kermit

yes, that frog.
Haiku # 73894, November 25, 2021 6:16 pm ET
by vhs
the old man in the
corner of the website did
the best poem here.
Haiku # 73893, November 25, 2021 6:04 pm ET
by vhs
we go off into
a tomb eventually
eat the scroll and speak.
Haiku # 73892, November 25, 2021 5:58 pm ET
by vhs
we eat off china
made in china with other
things made in china.
Haiku # 73891, November 25, 2021 5:53 pm ET
by vhs
China won’t kill us.
They need us for their demand.
Don’t worry too much.
Haiku # 73890, November 25, 2021 5:43 pm ET
by Random Indian of Random US City
Gas prices aren't high.
The population is high.
China will kill us.
Haiku # 73889, November 25, 2021 5:25 pm ET
by https://nypost.com/2021/10/18/war-movie-about-defeat-of-us-army-tops-chinas-box-office/ of So pure and wholesome.
Turkey is awesome.
I can eat it all day long.
Nap and eat some more.
Haiku # 73888, November 25, 2021 5:20 pm ET
by Thankfully fully full.
ah, welcome back my
lovely bad poets, we have
a place again now

thanks Janis...seriously
Haiku # 73887, November 25, 2021 4:58 pm ET
by vhs of thanksgiving haiku, i know canada...october...
Turkeys are stupid!
Look up in the rain and drown.
And those gay feathers.
Haiku # 73886, November 25, 2021 4:32 pm ET
by Roast turkey for Thanksgiving.
Figgy Figsgiving
Fork over the puckered figs
Please, more gutter pigs
Haiku # 73884, November 25, 2021 2:18 pm ET
by Figteenth of Figuary
This is a test of
the haiku posting system.
This is just a test.
Haiku # 73883, November 25, 2021 2:05 pm ET
by Adam
It's way past time, friend.
Hang them with their intestines.
Start with Zuckerberg.

Then China's Pooh Bear,
Biden, Obama, and Trump.
All commies and Cher.
Haiku # 73882, November 24, 2021 3:45 am ET
by Starkitten for Empress! of That would impress.
It is almost time
To rise and judge our leaders
For all their warcrimes.
Haiku # 73881, November 24, 2021 1:40 am ET
by Smiley Dance of Don't Worry Be Happy
All non-haiku verse:
You shall regret your actions.
Admit to your crimes.
Haiku # 73879, November 23, 2021 9:31 pm ET
by People's Court of Syllabic Restoration
Everything has to stand for something and mean something. Abbreviated apocryphal acronyms acrobatically arbitrate arbitrary asinine augmented alphabetization.
FAITA
Fuck Acronyms In the Ass.
Haiku # 73876, November 23, 2021 6:42 pm ET
by It's all bullshit. Every bit of it. It's all meaningless.
FIVE stand for Gospels.
SEVEN stands for Pleiades.
FIVE stands for flavors.
Haiku # 73874, November 23, 2021 1:15 pm ET
by Divine Alchemy of Lower Mathematics in SpEd
Old Japanese man:
You need botox injection,
Yes, you. In corner.
Haiku # 73873, November 23, 2021 1:12 pm ET
by Honorable Elder of Shinto Temple of Botox
The Dancing Grannies:
All five of them was rayciss.
I'm Allah's vengeance.
Haiku # 73872, November 23, 2021 1:10 pm ET
by Darrell tha Rap Artist of Not Getting 15 Year-olds Preggers fo awhile
The House of Gucci
Go ga-ga for some hoochee...
Lady G? Who she?
Haiku # 73871, November 23, 2021 12:58 pm ET
by Most Perceptive Cine-art Review of Our Time
Hey Mister Chester:
Your mommy's a molester;
Hope they arrest her.
Haiku # 73870, November 23, 2021 12:50 pm ET
by Mask-wearing Juju Witchdoctor of Gambia, Dancing to Village Drums
Chester you dumb bot.
Go swim in the Gambia.
Don't get your chip wet.
Haiku # 73869, November 23, 2021 12:18 pm ET
by I Heart Banjul of Write Haiku You Dolt
Excuse, that I can not participate now in discussion - it is very occupied. But I will return - I will necessarily write that I think on this question.
Haiku # 73868, November 23, 2021 12:12 pm ET
by Chestervoina of The Gambia
Waukesha Darrell:
His favorite Hendrix song is
"Crosstown Traffic". Yup.
Haiku # 73867, November 23, 2021 11:05 am ET
by Tiretrax All Across Your Back
One thousand dollars.
That's the price to kill someone
and then be set free.
Haiku # 73866, November 23, 2021 10:39 am ET
by Remember that! You might need it.
Write some cutting verse.
Like about cutting yourself
You big old gay blade . . .
Haiku # 73864, November 23, 2021 10:24 am ET
by Zorro the GLBTQ Haiku Activist
These rotten verses
even a dog will not eat
yet you devour.
Haiku # 73863, November 23, 2021 7:57 am ET
by And ask for seconds.
May a large poodle
rape your nostrils while you sleep
in drunken slumber.

What a way to go.
Suffocated by dog spooge.
And single malt scotch.
Haiku # 73862, November 23, 2021 7:50 am ET
by Just joking. Relax. of Take a deep breath. And fart... oh, you strained too hard. Go change your pants.
Don't you get sick of
this five seven five bullshit?
It's so meaningless!
Haiku # 73861, November 23, 2021 7:42 am ET
by Cockthistle.
Had your little fun ?
Went through the whole alphabet?
Please don't start numbers...
Haiku # 73858, November 23, 2021 6:28 am ET
by Twenty-six Ways to Bore me to Death
This five seven five
shit is too arbitrary.
Fuck Basho's ash-ho.
Haiku # 73855, November 22, 2021 6:07 pm ET
by Y'know?
a b c d e
f g h i j k l
m n o p q

r s t u v
w x y and z.
now I'll start again.
Haiku # 73854, November 22, 2021 5:38 pm ET
by next time won't you sing with me?
Zebadiah zaps
zipperhead zoophilia
zigzagging zebras.
Haiku # 73853, November 22, 2021 5:35 pm ET
by Zinedine Zidane
Your yucky yarbles
yielding youthful yearnings
yellow yolk yogurt.
Haiku # 73852, November 22, 2021 5:29 pm ET
by Yolandi
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