Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
28 Years, 44 Days and 77437 Haiku later...

Jason Momoa
dropped his end of the sofa
That's why I'm cockeyed
Haiku # 71425, August 21, 2021 12:40 am ET
by I. Grew up a victim of watching tv on a slant
The soda machine
My Orange Crush selection
Machine gave 2 dinks
Haiku # 71423, August 20, 2021 11:42 pm ET
by Consumer of Junk Food
Learn to ride a bike
Father wasn't a handyman
My bike had no seat

New Uncle tinkered
No one had a seat like mine
Pink ten inch dildo
Haiku # 71422, August 20, 2021 11:35 pm ET
by Lubina Moore of Apt. WD-40
A dish of car keys
Another swingers' night
Your friends are perverts
Haiku # 71419, August 20, 2021 10:27 pm ET
by I Walkedhere of Odd one out
Wasn't my fault, dear
You left our monster dildo
in the dining room
Haiku # 71418, August 20, 2021 10:23 pm ET
by Front and Centerpiece of When unexpected company cums (they usually return the hospitality)
He got a hotel
Defecated on the bed
Turned around. Checked out.
Haiku # 71416, August 20, 2021 10:09 pm ET
by Unwelcome Spaniel of Marriott
But those two inches
Transport you to a pure bliss
You'll believe in God
Haiku # 71415, August 20, 2021 10:01 pm ET
by B. Cuzz of He just fucked you
He has a huge cock.
Only two inches poke out
from his folds of fat.
Haiku # 71413, August 20, 2021 8:49 pm ET
by Ex Sumo Wrestler now haiku poet.
Stop looking at it
My eyes are up here, beach folks
You fokking sardines
Haiku # 71410, August 20, 2021 6:11 pm ET
by Mr. Jetski of Beach
Six hundred pound life.
Who else pigs out while they watch?
Wide Load coming through
Haiku # 71404, August 20, 2021 2:50 pm ET
by Broad Pitt
Breakfast for vampires
New! Blood Krispies Cereal
Start your night off right
Haiku # 71402, August 20, 2021 1:02 pm ET
by Fangtooth
Poopy poopy fart.
Pee-pee dingleberry queef.
Booger tampon juice.
Haiku # 71399, August 20, 2021 11:11 am ET
by Some species of jellyfish can return to the larval stage and start their life cycle all over again. of You just have to be spineless.
I prefer the spam
To all your juvenile trash
More interesting
Haiku # 71397, August 20, 2021 9:47 am ET
by Noticer of stupidity
Spam. Seriously,
Can Janis get a blocker?
Does she still run this?
Haiku # 71395, August 20, 2021 9:18 am ET
by Angry Haiku Poet of Is this her baby?
Spam. Seriously,
Can Janis get a blocker?
Does she still run this?
Haiku # 71394, August 20, 2021 9:17 am ET
by Angry Haiku Poet of Is this her baby?
Do you suffer from
Haikumatoid Darthritis?
Longpig Diet Cure.
Haiku # 71391, August 20, 2021 5:59 am ET
by Free shrunken head and tube of BenGay with every new order
Ten layers of shit
with alternating layers
of fromunda cheese
Haiku # 71390, August 20, 2021 5:54 am ET
by The New Lasagna of Prison Cooking
Well, it looks like that
I chopped it off for nothing.
Maybe fishing bait.
Haiku # 71386, August 20, 2021 3:26 am ET
by Waste not.
Playing with myself.
Hot Wheels racecar track set.
What were you thinking?
Haiku # 71385, August 20, 2021 3:24 am ET
by Blahblahblah
Playing with myself.
Hot Wheels racecar track set.
What were you thinking?
Haiku # 71384, August 20, 2021 3:24 am ET
by Blahblahblah
John Wayne Bobbit's schlong.
Surgically reattached.
He was remembered.
Haiku # 71382, August 20, 2021 3:21 am ET
by Har har har.
Do you remember
being dismembered, Ember.
Are you a member?
Haiku # 71381, August 20, 2021 3:17 am ET
by A boat made entirely of penises is a membership.
I chopped off my schlong.
Lewd posts should now disappear.
If your theory's true.
Haiku # 71380, August 20, 2021 3:12 am ET
by A small sacrifice.
Darth's penis (nice one)
The author of these lewd tales
I took dictation
Haiku # 71378, August 20, 2021 2:14 am ET
by Miss Mynah Byrd of Assistant to Darth Figpucker's schlong
If I had eight arms,
I'd masturbate to Seven
Sea Prawnography.
Haiku # 71377, August 20, 2021 2:05 am ET
by Octophile Nipon of Nippo nipples.
I don't remember.
I just play with my member.
Hot like an ember.
Haiku # 71376, August 20, 2021 2:01 am ET
by Eurotrash prawnography. of If I wrote it, I should get paid!!!
So you wrote all this.
You, the great Farth Digpucker.
We crown you with shit.
Haiku # 71372, August 19, 2021 10:41 pm ET
by Le Mage of Fromage
Globohomo trash:
You are retarded children.
You are godless filth.
Haiku # 71371, August 19, 2021 10:31 pm ET
by Beatific Christian of Evangelical Amurrica
Eat my cut and paste,
Filthy satanic Dutchman...
or are you Bellgian?
Haiku # 71370, August 19, 2021 10:10 pm ET
by Euro-Trash Take the Mark of the Beast
Overloaded porn.
It's not even porn that I
can masturbate to.
Haiku # 71369, August 19, 2021 10:06 pm ET
by What sad times these are.
Alien anus
Emitting soothing vapor
Stay with us on Earth!
Haiku # 71365, August 19, 2021 7:33 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Stepped in haiku goo
I suspect it came from you
Please, come clean my shoe
Haiku # 71364, August 19, 2021 7:29 pm ET
by Noticer
Don't make a duck face
Don't take another selfie
Go take a good shit
Haiku # 71363, August 19, 2021 7:26 pm ET
by Efficiency Expert of Modern Age
I always said that
this site should have a log in.
With pictures allowed.
Haiku # 71360, August 19, 2021 6:39 pm ET
by ... you know you want to see my ass.
Porn bots twenty-eight.
Haiku poets only four.
Porn bots victory!
Haiku # 71359, August 19, 2021 6:35 pm ET
by df
It's Brenda from Camden, again. I meant to ask if this site is for poetry or is it dirty stories? Also, is it possible to win any prizes here. Thanks, and have a great rest of your day.
Haiku # 71346, August 19, 2021 5:29 am ET
by Brenda L. of Camden, NJ
Conjoined twins unload
and watch the toilet explode
The shrapnel splits them
Haiku # 71341, August 19, 2021 12:00 am ET
by A Miracle of The Washroom
Make it stop, Darth
Haiku # 71340, August 18, 2021 11:57 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
The sign of old age.
You think you are done, but wait!
There is always more.
Haiku # 71339, August 18, 2021 11:43 pm ET
by On the toilet.
This is depressing.
More than my uncontrolled farts
and drooping anus.
Haiku # 71338, August 18, 2021 11:38 pm ET
by We can always sink to new depths.
Get out of the cult
I wouldn't trust loin cloth guy
Someone call Geraldo
Haiku # 71336, August 18, 2021 11:05 pm ET
by Concerned
Overdressed, perhaps.
It's not easy to pull off
How's the ball coverage?
Haiku # 71333, August 18, 2021 10:01 pm ET
by Lone Wolf Poet
Then he felt a bulge
that was bigger than his own
I am confused. Sir?
Haiku # 71330, August 18, 2021 7:30 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Out came the trimmers
Prize winning topiary
Neighbor, see my bush!
Haiku # 71328, August 18, 2021 6:42 pm ET
by Leif Figtickler
One saw a beaver
We both looked at her pussy
One saw rare roast beef
Haiku # 71327, August 18, 2021 6:33 pm ET
by Terrence Trenchmouth D'Arby's
He lured them in there
Teasing them with his bald head
They worked with no break

Both down on their knees
Heads bobbing in unison
Scrubbing the tile floor
Haiku # 71326, August 18, 2021 6:29 pm ET
by Noticer of Details
Peeing in public
Everyone hear your tinkle
Like rain on tin roof

Pooping in public
Everyone hear your thunder
God's Bowling Alley

Screwing in public
Everyone hear your girlfriend
say, Is it in yet?
Haiku # 71319, August 18, 2021 12:59 pm ET
by Noticer Public
There were three sisters
They all had their periods
and only one tampon
Haiku # 71316, August 18, 2021 8:53 am ET
by Riddler
It's a new day (yawn).
Let the haiku get worse now.
God is on His throne.
Haiku # 71312, August 18, 2021 6:22 am ET
by God Hates Haiku of Course.
Less syllable please
That is all we are asking
Consider others
Haiku # 71311, August 18, 2021 6:06 am ET
by Noticer of Paragraphs
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