Masturbatory:
Strip club without alcohol.
Sober reflections.
by But the tattoos are still trashy.
How can I top that?
I know, I’ll let out some farts
uh oh those aren’t farts
by Loosey Goosey of Look for the telltale stain and shitface grin
Visit nursing homes.
Old people are such a drain.
Cough and sneeze on them.
by Visit my ex and her mom too.
Go spread it around.
Because sharing is caring.
Less humans is good.
by We need more monsters. of That write bad haiku.
Forgot to tell you
that I tested positive
for Covid-19
by Human Torch of Burning Up
Her clitoris popped.
Like an enormous pimple.
Or John Belushi.
The beige cream filling.
Like Duncan's Bavarian.
Thank God for coffee.
by If you need to clear your cash, just send it to me.
so i cleared the cache
well fuck me with a great rake
like a stone garden
praise be to janis
patron goddess of haiku
mother of poets
by ash of bearing the shame of being a macroscopic retardigrade
bereft of comfort
for what was write is now wrong
and does unbelong
by ash of time for therapy
without a great wave
where is the huge manatee
still able to surf ?
by ash of non-pacific error identified
hokusai is gone
and a great wave of sadness
breaks on my browser
by ash of firefox layout tsunami disaster zone
firefox breaks your site
making bad poetry worse
than it has to be
by ash of alternative browser fandom
bears of little brain
when tardigrades act stupid
they're retardigrades
by ash
My apologies
An argument over mice
We hissed and made up
by Cat of Alley
The cat howled loudly.
Was it fighting or fucking?
I chose not to look.
by Minding my own.
At this time each day
A wee turtle head pokes out
Splashes in the pond
by Regular guy of National Fecalgraphic Reading Room
Although they smoke grass
Potheads like to eat Skittles
and taste the rainbow
by I. M. Munchin of Bottomless bag of Funyuns
Although they eat grass,
tortoises love hibiscus
and succulent pears.
by But they don't like being bounced around on the trampoline. of I don't know why.
I’ve seen that pug dog
Sounded like an iron lung
He humped a chair leg
by Trip to the Moon of On the end of my shoe
Analyze dog farts
via gas chromatogram
and high res mass spec.
You will find the truth.
Pugs are not from this planet.
Alien outcasts!
Earth's a prison camp.
Exiled for their foul stench,
No planet wants them.
by Bug-eyed monstrosities!
Canine Flatulence
Otherwise known as dog farts
Always a surprise
by Loyal Hound of Looking around for it
Strange that when I view
it on my phone I cannot
see rotten dog man.
It's not important.
I never had a problem
with the smaller font.
I can see my schlong.
So small font is no problem.
Water bears love me.
by Get back in your petri dish you slut retardigrade! of The captchas are stupid though. Log in to post would be better. My opinion. Fuck Google.
This website's just like
an electron microscope!
Hitachi SEM.
Scanning transmission
electron microscopy
neighborhood salesman.
Wanna see something?
Check out my collection of
sexy water bears.
by I bang tardigrades! of sexytardigrades.com
As the poets age
we find that this larger font
will improve the site
by And it will make Darth’s penis of appear 4 sizes larger
Serial killers
have issues, I prefer the
term mass murderer.
by Cyanide and stuff like that. of I hate all people equally.
Asian man speaks of,
stereotypically,
eating rotten dogs.
by The verse is worse of rehearse in the hearse, vomit in purse
Someday you might be
the first serial killer
based in outer space
by Find your bliss of (It’s probably in your pants)
But it worked just fine.
Can I ask what was broken?
Other than poets.
by DW of I still think we should be allowed to post a nude pic of ourselves next to the poems.
"If it ain't broken..."
If it's actually broken
it doesn't apply
by Janis
Shift reload the site
If things seem like they're broken
clear your browser cache.
by Janis
Nothing to wipe with
up here except these moon rocks
Last time I do this
by Uncomfortable of Outer Space
It's way more epic
to go space in outer poop.
That's how warp drives work.
by Talk about warped!
You only die once.
You live each day of your life.
Live to make huge poops.
by DW of Brought to you by Fiber One
You only live once
One day I want to go poop
up in Outer Space
by Dream Dreamer of Regular Boring Toilet Seat
Bad Haiku machine
Make payment and selection
You receive nothing
by No answer of Bad Haiku Vending LLC
I have never heard
of a serial killer
who was a midget
by conversation of elevator
Butterflied and stuffed
Organic free range penis
in a lush cream sauce
by Try our new MENu of Dink’s Diner
Philippines poem.
Verses that eat rotten dogs.
Like grandma's beef stew.
by Chew it well. of Sticks in your teeth.
Like a dream catcher
But this one catches your farts
And they are nightmares
by Freddy Kroger of Your Instafart Shopper
i'm badly triggered
i miscounted syllables
this is traumatic
by ash of enough fucking recaptcha already
your base are belong
someone set you up the bomb
and i can't sumbit
by ash of microsoft edge (make it stop)
firefox is broken
all those haiku look like shit
oh wait... mostly they are
by ash
Looks great on a phone.
On a pc looks like shit.
Just one question... why???
by If it ain't broke, don't fix it.
Dead dogs eat poems.
Zombie canine hell-hound cunts.
Ripping out your tongue.
by And that's probably a good thing. of Y'know. ?
Viewing on my phone.
It looks a little better.
But where's the dog guy?
And I miss the waves.
And the fish stink of the boats.
Dead volcano farts.
by Samurai spam yer eye of Kosher lobster Rolls Royce
Can’t help noticing
how big your haiku looks now
You been working out?
by Noticer of Details
My battery's low.
So I'll have to make this quick.
Fart fart fart fart fart.
by fart of fart
Gotta catch 'em all.
Of course I mean STDs.
Pokemon are gay.
by Bug Hunter Bill of Bug Hunters Unanimous
I'd eat my verses.
I'd eat my verses so hard.
You are my mirror.
by Buffalo Bill's dog, Precious of Down in the hole with some new victim.
The site's old enough
for me to have sex with and
not feel too guilty.
by Dirty old bastard of under the pitched tent
Where has Trump gone to?
No extradition treaty
in Somalia.
by Look for the orange dot in satellite pic. of course that's him.
