beatnik beating off?
next question who are you to
judge, remember the

"Christian" well he's back
and ive met pony girls and
i'll prob. marry one

Drop nukes on China.
It would improve the pollution.
Clean up the planet.

Oh, wait, nevermind.
I forgot they make Fleshlight.
Wank, spank, shlurp, spooge, spooge.

Remove batteries
from a light saber handle
to put in Fleshlight.

Radioactive
sperm cells slithering like snakes
to conquer China.

A nation of thieves,
copyright infringementists,
commie criminals.

Destroyed by my sperm.
One for everyone Chinaman.
Next is Switzerland.

Rummaging or theft,
what was found in your garage
were homemade porn tapes.

The miniature
horse was a rather nice touch.
made me want to touch....

myself.

to go to a thrift
store, find a used vcr
watch those old crap flicks

what shall we find that
many have forgotten and
thrown out for new toys

Bring my enima!
Shove it way deep up in there!
Flush out those haiku!

coffee, bathroom, here
go to bathroom shower drink
more coffee, repeat

Arnold is Arnold
Hercules in new York ya
dat's a funny flick

but you know only
the best can make the weirdest
interesting :)

hmm so one person
wants to ho over the top
and the other wants to

be ironic a
bit and gets fucked by the one
voice on here being

ironic iron
pumping alone coastal mast.
skiing in alberta

the skeletons in
my closet want to meet with
your skeletons to

dance the last dance and
pray the last prayer for R'yleh
has finally arisen

irony is old
obsolete, quietly put
in the attic, just

only found in thrift
stores and 4 am on tv shows
as tv dies out and

we die out

I can't just let you
post a few things alone but
after years not being

here I just dropped in
to post a few dumb words you'll
tear to bits and I'll

forget it again

irony and and
blasphemy all in one place
we can dance macabe

skeletons with paunch
never growing up still the
fanboy bitching han

he shot first

For white guys only:
Do you feel inadequate?
Do you bore your spouse?

Is your dick too small?
Hang a heavy weight from it.
It will become long.

Just like the black guys,
your dick will be ten inches.
And also be black.

Black with gangrene pus.
Now you have to amputate.
We'll call you Caitlyn.

Going to Sundance
Need to buy clothes that fit in
Lumbersexual

those boobs weren't pooping
it was a cleveland steamer
nestled in cleavage

Does your weener act
Like a very scared turtle?
HIT IT WITH HAMMER!!!!!!!

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I also like farts.
Great minds think alike, yet great
behinds stink alike.

They aren't pretending.
One time I saw boobs pooping.
It messed up my head.

M. Night Shyamalan
Declares plot twist for the train
It goes in my ass

That's reality
Truth is something different
I think farts smell good

That is my own reality
But it is not truth to you
You see what I mean?

I hope so because
I have no idea where
This train is going

Street kids huffing glue.
They will not live to forty.
But what fun they'll have!
Getting fucked each night.
Often by sev'ral grown men.
Just to buy some food.

Don't give them money.
They'll just buy more Rugby glue.
Give them fruit and bread.

There is no truth here.
Poems contain only lies.
See, I told you so!

That wasn't my sword.
And it wasn't your pride that
got penetrated.

Dark Souls, why do you
Slowly insert your hot sword
Into my pride?

could you give to me
incomprehensible truth?
you can eat maggots

Finally some truth,
and a bit of humor here .
D F cracks me up

The old man in line.
Purgatory in WalMart.
He sneezed out his teeth.

I did a good thing.
Taught kids to play frog baseball.
Saves lots of money.

Frogs don't cost a thing.
Their parents did not approve.
I guess they are rich.

We lie to ourselves
and each other all the time
Casting the first stone?

Why does God tell lies?
Is that any way to be?
I am that I am.

If you can stand pain,
enough manowar poison
can get you quite high.

I will dry some out.
Then I will try to smoke them.
High risk Transcendence.

I'll keep you informed.
In case you want a ticket
to a Higher Plane.

A beer got revenge.
Well, really it was nine beers.
What a hangover!

Cats making fish stew
Children play with the frogsbee
Bears plotting revenge

Dead frog in the road.
It lies there flat and rather...
aerodynamic.

There once was a poem that was stupid.
The word stupid rhymes with cupid.
At least it's not a haiku;
For that would smell of poo.
And in my pants I just poop-ed.d

Self-referenced poems
are holes into the sewers
of hell. Don't fall in.

evi1 - a novel about you

passing by the gate
wafting smell of haiku stew
like hot stale fish beer

mmmmmeow

always smiling face
lustful gaze unrequited
party of one please

put on your red shoes
and dance the blues because it
is time to do so

You know it is true.
The cat in the hat tapped that
Hooker acrobat

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Dreaming lottery
Wasting time on foolishness
That will never be

Funky monkey cum.
It flies through the zoo cage bars.
And lands in your face.

Reminiscent of
Clarice Starling getting owned
by Multiple Miggs.

You're a monkey's bitch.
But there are worse things to be.
Such as a poet.

Phuque hoff copycat
Hue Kant eliminate ewe
Drink from mourning due

Only bonus is...
leaving the toilet seat up.
missing her essence

Masturbator cum
His foreskin is green wrinkled
Mad pervert horny

The waiter is dumb
He forgot ice cream sprinkles
Sad dessert for me

The weather is dumb.
I forecast titty sprinkles.
Small droplets of me.