Bashō says something unhelpful
Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
29 Years, 79 Days and 78055 Haiku later...
i was feeling real
hopeless enough to forget
those very words
Haiku # 50557 December 11, 2013 8:00 am ET
by vhs
John Three sixteen.
Don't ever forget these words.
And enter heaven.

For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.
Haiku # 50556 December 11, 2013 6:46 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
you can have a nice
literary career for a
tabloid press in england

df, i am sure
Haiku # 50555 December 11, 2013 1:53 am ET
by vhs
but i can't i just
won't shut up, i must add more
and more and more the

flow of words just can't
stop, like the id just had a
major orgasm
Haiku # 50554 December 11, 2013 1:14 am ET
by vhs
all right, i think i
need to try the silent thing
and leave this guy here

he's having way too
much fun riling me up and
enjoying the noise
Haiku # 50553 December 11, 2013 1:05 am ET
by vhs
i do not want to
go down the path you have made
for it seems a waste
Haiku # 50552 December 11, 2013 1:01 am ET
by vhs
god damn it, i don't
have an answer, it's times like
that I just want to

shut the fuck up and
let the voice that seems to get
my mind riled up just

speak to nothing, I
mean why do we come back to
folks who would be more

than happy to see me
in a box, dead, not caring
about life or death for

either he is dead
or he is a sociopath
a human hard on...

isn't the internet fucking wonderful
Haiku # 50551 December 11, 2013 1:00 am ET
by vhs
he seems to know the
buttons to push up and down
I was cured all right...
Haiku # 50550 December 11, 2013 12:56 am ET
by vhs
Jesus loves you all.
No matter how much you sin.
Believe and be saved!
Haiku # 50549 December 10, 2013 10:33 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
The anger and rage
Simmers below the surface
Must control the beast
Haiku # 50548 December 10, 2013 4:26 pm ET
by Shirley Smothers
Prison's not so bad.
Exercise, three hots and cot.
And sex in showers.

Lots of time to read.
And meditate or yoga.
All paid for by you!
Haiku # 50547 December 10, 2013 1:37 pm ET
by DF of You never know 'til you try.
oh well, not my deal
not my problem, not my stick
not my time or place
Haiku # 50546 December 10, 2013 12:41 pm ET
by vhs
I only write lies.
And that is the complete truth.
Really, I mean it!
Haiku # 50545 December 10, 2013 11:04 am ET
by Go take your high blood pressure medicine.
I found a wallet.
It had one-fifty-two cash.
Chris Morris' loss.

I took out the cash.
And tossed wallet in gutter.
Don't want credit cards.

Stolen credit cards
are for crack-heads who want to
get thrown in prison.

Early Christmas gift.
So if you know Chris Morris,
tell him I said thanks.





































































































































































































































































































































































































































































































I bet VHS believes all that! Ha ha ha ha!!!
He's so silly!
Hey, VHS, when are you going to Western Union that money to me? I'm in dire need. I lost my wallet and I'm stuck in a train station in Europe. No, really!
Haiku # 50544 December 10, 2013 10:39 am ET
by Evil Christmas of At the tallest Xmas tree in Macy's.
Remove stick from ass.
Bury it way deep in hole.
Live your life, not mine.
Haiku # 50543 December 10, 2013 9:02 am ET
by Complete sentences suck ass.
then again maybe when
my inner volcano bursts
magma turns to words
Haiku # 50542 December 9, 2013 8:58 pm ET
by vhs of trying to watch the french connection
just leave me alone
said the last haiku but when
the time comes when you

want a loved one if
you are CAPABLE of love
you will hunger well

and satan laughing spreads his wings but you've heard that chestnut too
Haiku # 50541 December 9, 2013 5:05 pm ET
by vhs
and the jokes go on
but death row awaits us all
such is prison jokes...

the humor of the damned
Haiku # 50540 December 9, 2013 5:03 pm ET
by vhs
as such the douchebag
libertarian of gen
x can go fuck it

self, what's the fucking
point of expressing feelings
to a generation

that was already
dead in the first place? zombies
hedonists and trolls
Haiku # 50539 December 9, 2013 5:02 pm ET
by vhs
Probability.
Fornication, lies, deceit.
I need a receipt.

Entertained clients.
Tax deductible blow job.
Education fund.





































































































































































































































































































































































































































































































































































































You have nothing better to do than scroll all the way down here then?
Haiku # 50538 December 9, 2013 3:46 pm ET
by evi1
Remove stick from ass.
Bury it in a deep hole.
Live your life, not mine.
Haiku # 50537 December 9, 2013 1:18 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
when my concerns are
so stagnant and I feel less
free to talk about...
Haiku # 50536 December 9, 2013 12:27 pm ET
by vhs
well God damn and you
get more insight durned cynics
occams' razor to my

ego
Haiku # 50535 December 9, 2013 8:00 am ET
by vhs
nothing much to say
never stopped anyone else
and none less than me
Haiku # 50534 December 9, 2013 6:43 am ET
by ash
I am flying to
England tomorrow, and so
Please just let me sleep
Haiku # 50533 December 8, 2013 8:29 pm ET
by William Boot
You're American

European boy
He came to America
To find his true dreams
Haiku # 50532 December 8, 2013 8:21 pm ET
by BSA VSC
A porridge of tears.
For Miss Muffet or The Bears.
It's a sad, sad lunch.

And they devour.
Poor fictional characters.
To entertain us.
Haiku # 50531 December 8, 2013 6:46 pm ET
by huh huh huh... you said "anus" of Beavis died for your sins... well, maybe not.
Stucco in mens' rooms.
All for the ease of painting
over the boogers.
Haiku # 50530 December 8, 2013 7:58 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
and i may add for
a price, trade me a pound of flesh
for such a cost

shylock no? or will you
give me your soul or birthright
for this world or a

bowl of porridge, now
consider the price before
you invest in 30 pieces...
Haiku # 50529 December 8, 2013 3:30 am ET
by vhs
and the same sorts of
posts go on on different boards
till one says take off

and decides the net
should never have been turned on
in the first place, but

the doors to hell are quite open
Haiku # 50528 December 8, 2013 3:26 am ET
by vhs
The nipples of life,
Oozing their filthy nectar.
And we lap it up.
Haiku # 50527 December 8, 2013 1:16 am ET
by DF of These captchas are nasty!
rapt winter slumbers
whence incendiary dreams
tame the elements
Haiku # 50526 December 7, 2013 11:33 pm ET
by Lush
alas and a twat
rest assured, I careth not
horrors by design
Haiku # 50525 December 7, 2013 11:27 pm ET
by Lush
formatting atwist
what horrid gremlin is this?
my ill fingertips?
Haiku # 50524 December 7, 2013 11:25 pm ET
by Lush
formidable mount
human cunning will surmount
a 'copter rental
Haiku # 50523 December 7, 2013 11:23 pm ET
by Lush
You must Tame The River

Behold my mountains
That cascade before your ark
Witness labored life
Haiku # 50522 December 7, 2013 10:34 pm ET
by Robert King
I just realized among all the noise, no one read Robert's snow poem down there. Give it a read.
Haiku # 50521 December 7, 2013 2:56 pm ET
by DF
$1500 should do.
Haiku # 50520 December 7, 2013 2:40 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Exactly! You're a genius!
And we have a believer
That truth is on a

public poetry message board!

Oh, I'm in Europe and I lost my wallet and ID. I need you to Western Union me some money right away!
Haiku # 50519 December 7, 2013 2:39 pm ET
by I never lie!
so we have a strong
believer in the law of
entropy, eat, drink

and fuck everything
you can because tomorrow
we may all die then?

so life has no real
meaning except to the one
living his own but

mine and others don't
Haiku # 50518 December 7, 2013 11:56 am ET
by vhs
To be Crystal Water

Blankets falling slow
Like soft music from the moon
To listeners low
Haiku # 50517 December 7, 2013 10:55 am ET
by Robert King
The inevetible heat death of the universe makes all we do futile and pointless with the exception of whoring, drinking, and making as many babies as we possibly can because in doing so we are assisting the universe in its own downfall and therefore teaming up with the universe's self-destructive attitude and by taking sides like this and making a big joke out of life, we, in a way, live forever and if you believe any of that then I'll see you @ the titty bar tonight and you can buy me a lapdance and a beer and that beats counting silly bulls and trying to put some profound meaning and order to the chaos that ensues from the 2nd Law of Thermodynamics, but if that's what you want to do, it's your funeral. Fun real. Real fun. Set the controls for the heart of the sun.
Haiku # 50516 December 7, 2013 6:41 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
When they are better
Than this moment...and I think
Moments reoccur
Haiku # 50515 December 7, 2013 2:28 am ET
by Radar of Ottumwa
when are the real well
poets going to come out
and stop telling jokes
Haiku # 50514 December 7, 2013 1:31 am ET
by vhs
Thanks for suggesting
Starbucks. Walmart hasn't been
Working out for me
Haiku # 50513 December 7, 2013 1:06 am ET
by Drew of Cleveland
I masturbate nude.
In a chair in the corner.
Sometimes at Starbucks.

I can think of worse
things to be than gay lovers
who are Star Wars fans.

A high school teacher.
A rich 3rd world dictator.
Even VHS!
Haiku # 50512 December 5, 2013 11:13 pm ET
by Darth Figpucker of of above love dove shove glove
I shat gold bullion.
(From snorting too much gold dust.)
Disney Fairy glam.

I want a Watson.
It will be my new laptop.
Yottabytes of porn.
Haiku # 50509 December 5, 2013 1:46 pm ET
by Darth Figpucker. of Invest in raw sewage.
i was getting more
than a bit tired being torn
to bits over

well i could add a
list and check it twice but I
couldn't keep track it's

just not sensible
to try and do so, to walk
on and let go too

that's hard
Haiku # 50507 December 4, 2013 11:27 pm ET
by vhs
all right, might as well
say something to keep you on
"The Rock" so to speak
Haiku # 50506 December 4, 2013 11:26 pm ET
by vhs
The dangerous lull.
Lull-a-bye-bye sea you later.
Just don't try to think.

The waves are my breath.
The ocean rocks me to sleep.
Riding forever.
Haiku # 50505 December 4, 2013 8:23 pm ET
by Darth Figpucker