Poets are grumpy
old men, and grumpy old men
are they, verily!

I am too bitter
about some kid making a joke
about the death of

books, addendum was
not enough, my spirit demands
he eat flesh, drink blood

but that's the stale old
wafers and grape juice of the
protestant ritual

that's how pissed I am

I should be working;
Not posting silly haiku.
That's my work ethic.

Uploading my book.
To Booksie dot com. What fun!
It shall offend all!

Hannibal Lecter;
my favorite character.
I like fava beans!


What do you call a banana that ate a banana?
....
A bananibal!

Hush, my high poo fiend;
bare your hard dick cheese, oh squeeze
guy secrete over.

what if I eat hannibal lecter?

You are what you eat
So I became a nacho
Please do not eat me

Lush, my haiku friend;
Share your hardened cheese, oh please
My secret lover

holy cows and goats
I like camembert at noon
and feta at nine

Post-microwave cheese
can be extremely tasty
if it's sharp cheddar.

Now this sounds crazy,
but a tangy Swiss will make
delicious nachos.

But never heat brie;
doing so ruins the taste.
Always eat brie cold.

so we grow old and
we grow with regrets, no shit
let it go damn it

maybe you give your
own ass a second chance but
I expect snarls, shrugs

well you make what life
has in store, but you don't hear
from those happy in

the arts now do you?
just the guy bitching about
something to glen beck

devoid of reason
and absent explanation
voided my bowels

I opened the site
and read what I was doing
double u tee eff??

a long time reader
and perpetual poster
now I've read and lived

alex of Melbourne
i'm literally eating
hardened cheese right now

I want castration.
To never get hard again.
To be a eunuch.

Marriage is pure hell.
As fucking a lifeless corpse.
She only wants cash.

Whores are more honest.
They don't pretend to love you,
while wanting your cash.

I made some nachos
There is no-one to share with
The cheese has hardened.

A cake is baking.
Rum and scoured, partly devoured.
Fatter than me, hell.

My asshole itches.
Damn those Philippine butt worms!
My farts won't kill them.

They're impervious
to even my flatulence!
Indestructible!

Philippine butt worms
inspired Prometheus,
but are hella worse!

awake and aching
summoned, sourced, fully divorced
shatter evr'y bell

damnable image
lost in metaphor once more
i just walked around

Monday is so slow
How will I ever make it
Friday is so far

Fuck Priceline dot com.
They'll rebook you to Iran.
Two day layover.

I was like baby
baby baby oh - baby
baby baby no

once adrift upon
then next inherent and soiled
today in orbit

beckon the truth, mate
and suffer indigestion
no plate, a buffet

if I have to read
the flowers of evil and
feel myself snore, a

ripe time to one up the old drug
addicted poet eh?

and darth is a well
better writer than I am
so well, are we nuts?

the rest of the net
gone all flat and bland and corped
out, soroyama

where the hell is your
sexy cyborg women here
well dr. who's good

well what about the
french, escouffier and wine
and cheese, no heart probs.

don't get me started

We Americans
eat not for hunger, but fun.
Why do they hate us?

Balut McMuffin (R)
Hard boiled duck embryo
On toasted rice bread.

Abortion clinic
is right next door to McD's.
Is it really duck?

there's ethnic choices
in food in mcdonalds and it
sounds better the choice

peeps in india
have as well as japan they
might sell them here hmm?

well pink is the cute
pop star who is kinda punk
commercially and...

the meat grinder thing
you see my mind works like that
without drugs, so think

of my mind up on
something, I'd become a
fucking accountant

"numbers, numbers!!! wow"
but I suppose, ever read
The Phantom Tollbooth?

"If my crack clenches,
fist it open before I
use it and lose my stool."
--The Poo
Almost a haiku.

we're just two lost souls
oh by the way, which one's pink ?
well my mind's a blank

I had a friend in high school
who thought the lyrics were:
"How can you have any pussy
if you don't beat your meat?"

Ah, the good old days.
Watching freaks trip on acid
at Pink Floyd The Wall.

to reply dryly
it's not about just deserts
but rather desserts

how can I get any
pudding, if I don't eat my meat
of course for pig...

that is an open ended question
open for discussion

Now children, play nice!
Or you will sit in time out
and get no desert.

Japanese poets
get high on sniffing panties
from vending machines.

I went snorkeling.
Radioactive blue fish
nibbled my nut sack.

even next to you
the distance between us two
is significant

I think calling a
person an ignorant gaijin
when, you're from where

canada? come on.
even those with honor had
tempers but ethos...

self flagellation
introspection and venom
it's just bad haiku

The native had climbed
a coconut tree and then
jacked off to tourists.

Much skill and talent
the little monkey did have,
ogling beach girls.

Pina colada
with extra protein, anyone?
I'm glad I don't drink.

fight or flight brain kicks
in, makes a move, the reptile licks
chomps, eats it's prey then

advertizes for geico

the pigs, the pigs, are
often wondering why we
turn them to bacon

and the demons tore
the limbs from the soul until
cast out by the light

Drinking hot chocolate.
In the Philippines summer.
Just because I can.

hunter and hemmingway
blew their brains out at their end
and what's his name there

hung himself which sucks
but when pain exceeds creation
the death instinct piles in

kerouac's liver blew
i will not throw pearls before
well you know the verse

and you know that is
what I think of you all here