solid in the towers
of ivory but after vatican II
even that world changed

John XXIII

Curmudgeonliness
discombobulated and
Inconsequential

beasts in a cafe
on display, espresso deals
alien creatures sit

when the urge comes to
intimidate and smite who can
contain the damned id?

the night of the long
knives cost the lives of hitler's
foes their opinions

it was just this once
whence a feeling overcomes
a big I'm sorry :(

And with that i wish
you a hearty "fuck you too"
Smite with all my might

the search remains futile
the question remains the same
the dance stays inside
the heart's odor undetected
strings become short winded
asphyxiating with blood like water
as the grave closes over
valleys of the shadow
pay debt to mother's nature
she then stares from beyond
the master's bus station

what the fuck is wrong
with all you goddamned poets
one stanza only

I feel i want a
soul to have a guiding light
to know she's not in

this world alone but she
knows I accept her as she is
all are Devo

I do see myself
tempted to jump, voices say
give up...but I can't

some other voice says
outside the chatter of man
you must wait and stay

to second guess this
life of mine and I can't yours
so much social noise

some retreat to be
forgotten to heal, to see
and repent of noise

I feel I want to
die sometimes because I am
haunted, uncleansed but

the work must be done
and more within than without
others have their own

the resentment of
childish outbursts, to seek friends
from enemies? self

interest has to
play a part on their behalf
otherwise, no go

so we slow down to
see what we are doing to
self and others, to see

the blue sky at last
the clear moon, the whole silly
simple things missed out

the glory of this art
creation, so cheesy but
expressed and vital

faster when u fall
hauntings, majestic ruins
careful of wishes

if she lived I'm sure
the twixt of two candle wicks
would factor this time

a naked janis joplin
is posted on my wall
I wish she lived

she lived too quickly
she died too soon, through choices
made on a quick whim

there are a lot of
good poets on here and my
aesthetic is shall

we say, a bit too
well, hypo-critical and
too self centered, too...

who are these rude girls
these maidens who hold our hearts
to mould as if clay

I am terrified
by the changes being made
in my own life, and

terrified by what
might happen, to just learn to
live in "now" is new

it's in a name but
in a face too, the sides of
the human spirit

jeckyll and hyde call
the angel and devil on
human shoulders says

turn these stones to bread
or don't do that thing that we
cannot live by bread alone

(went over 575 again)

(and William Nipress is CIVIL, not gay)

Read your submission
Thought it boring and childish
Written in my name
*
Tried to insult me?
Please feel free to try again
You did not succeed

up to the heavens
on a life stairway we climb
and down and up and

award of excellence
for my science fair kindie
i'm so very proud

up and down the stairs
the stairs I go up and down
my up and down life

up and down she goes
and in her hand she holds this.
damn dirty mind boys

Moldy flowers rest
Chickenshit endocrine mess
I am bored to death

why is the sky blue
well son, the light from the sun
bounces off air parts

and reflects the blue
tints back at our eyes from the
sun itself, thus QED........

I wonder what its like
to be Amish and live in that
self contained world there

I have no doubt that
These therapeutic Ramblings
Which we skip over
*
Are doing him good
Boring as hell going nowhere
Do we read them

flame me till i roast
hose down my tormented soul
the world stays the same

cockroaches are strong
keys in their little bodies
wonder of their souls

DId u count that on~5
your fingers Or did you take~7
off your shoes and count~5
;)

this ache is too strong
melody is my affair
nothing else except

like real perception
the viewer's eye is his own
and it's his/her truth

this is a very
terrifying period
of change for all souls

the nations at war
to fight a few who desire
not to see us

for who we really
want to be and wish to dream
a world of newness

a lot has to do
with the way we all see the
world, when we see it

through another's eyes
then we see it a new for
quite a kick you know

I can't see the whole
thing of connecting to
nature except to be

maybe there is peace
or. maybe not..just a mind (@#%$)
crimes of the pasture

I have not a clue
Mr. Green or Mustard or
Damnit is it real

we all know my thoughts
are ruled by my feelings good
or bad, this is what

it is, stupid things
said with stupid passion in
the uptight outburst

if I fall in love
in real life, expect silence
from my big fat type

one word joke, no shit
ass whiped, where shit, shit flushed
zen then, shit happened

confused emotions
often drive a soul used to
a sheltered life and

people who they knew are
now gone, dead, dying, focus
leads to frustration

peace of mind is hard
to win, it is lack of knowledge
if i find this peace

of mine, it is likely
you will not hear from me anymore
not from a suicide

but from a sense that
I finally connect with people
in an empathic way

i am not tactful
i am not that sophisticated
I am just a caveman

i bludgeon with words
trying to fashion spears
and crack the marrow from

the English bones... mistakes
I have not forgiven myself for
having a hard time letting go

slights, over the edge, blocking
feeling blocked, needing release
i know sympathy is a tired thing

only gained through self interest
we are all self interested
if you could cut my throat

in a dark alley to feed your crack habit, you would
burroughs said, wouldn't you?

you'd kill, lie, cheat, steal
to feed your habit, who speaks in toungues...

is there a choice anymore?
but to clam up and die in a corner or

accept the sickness
and die fighting and perhaps
I might bloody win after all

let there be long codes
standards writing wisdom to
the times, as we get

older human nature
does not change, no matter
how old we get

some will be social
some will be at peace alone
this is the way of things

the social are in my mind
basically afraid to be alone
and afraid to leave others

alone

because they fear boredom
and they don't have original
thoughts because they

feel individuality and thinking
for themselves because they
fear rejection... I am not
sure if I want acceptance

I do not want to act
violently to society but
i just want a chance

to figure out who I am
in that society and a compulsion
to write these issues out here

repetitively over and over
has brought out people who don't really care about my

life and i am selfish in my own
way but I feel that people like
yourselves also have selfish

motives based on a desire
to do this or that in a setting
and to get away from a social
group that resentments are
boost on requires to stop

feeding the troll...

if I was a genuinely mean
guy you'd blame yourselves
I won't become evil

I'm too good at being annoying

the overplayed the
oversensitive victim
grows up or dies out

when I leave here and don't respond to this website i have peace of mind because i know I haven't allowed people to needle me and I think that people have access to my life that makes it think it's ok if i let them but if I stole your identity, knew how to hack into your private lives, psychologically led someone you loved into an insane asylum, this is the paradox of chatrooms, bullietin boards, e-mails, webservers, social groups. Social groups play games and on line they are cliquish, clubbish and much like the social groups in high school. In the case of on line a narrowing sense of lack of anonymity is forcing people to mature. Now the entire time I've been here I've tried that only to be called "mad," to have my weaknesses rubbed in my face, and my writing suffers as a result. I give up on trying to figure you people out... Go figure yourselves out, my writing is my business if I ever get a bloody book out and stop playing the victim to morons who think "because you let them" precludes "do unto others..."

when the pot boils
turn that heart down to simmer
making a great stew

little cute people
gorgeous faces spreading love
tomorrow's children

laughter above clouds
below ground roots have their stand
free falling seems fine

out of print underline
recognizable by black
mark of trace machine