I am terrified
by the changes being made
in my own life, and

terrified by what
might happen, to just learn to
live in "now" is new

it's in a name but
in a face too, the sides of
the human spirit

jeckyll and hyde call
the angel and devil on
human shoulders says

turn these stones to bread
or don't do that thing that we
cannot live by bread alone

(went over 575 again)

(and William Nipress is CIVIL, not gay)

Read your submission
Thought it boring and childish
Written in my name
*
Tried to insult me?
Please feel free to try again
You did not succeed

up to the heavens
on a life stairway we climb
and down and up and

award of excellence
for my science fair kindie
i'm so very proud

up and down the stairs
the stairs I go up and down
my up and down life

up and down she goes
and in her hand she holds this.
damn dirty mind boys

Moldy flowers rest
Chickenshit endocrine mess
I am bored to death

why is the sky blue
well son, the light from the sun
bounces off air parts

and reflects the blue
tints back at our eyes from the
sun itself, thus QED........

I wonder what its like
to be Amish and live in that
self contained world there

I have no doubt that
These therapeutic Ramblings
Which we skip over
*
Are doing him good
Boring as hell going nowhere
Do we read them

flame me till i roast
hose down my tormented soul
the world stays the same

cockroaches are strong
keys in their little bodies
wonder of their souls

DId u count that on~5
your fingers Or did you take~7
off your shoes and count~5
;)

this ache is too strong
melody is my affair
nothing else except

like real perception
the viewer's eye is his own
and it's his/her truth

this is a very
terrifying period
of change for all souls

the nations at war
to fight a few who desire
not to see us

for who we really
want to be and wish to dream
a world of newness

a lot has to do
with the way we all see the
world, when we see it

through another's eyes
then we see it a new for
quite a kick you know

I can't see the whole
thing of connecting to
nature except to be

maybe there is peace
or. maybe not..just a mind (@#%$)
crimes of the pasture

I have not a clue
Mr. Green or Mustard or
Damnit is it real

we all know my thoughts
are ruled by my feelings good
or bad, this is what

it is, stupid things
said with stupid passion in
the uptight outburst

if I fall in love
in real life, expect silence
from my big fat type

one word joke, no shit
ass whiped, where shit, shit flushed
zen then, shit happened

confused emotions
often drive a soul used to
a sheltered life and

people who they knew are
now gone, dead, dying, focus
leads to frustration

peace of mind is hard
to win, it is lack of knowledge
if i find this peace

of mine, it is likely
you will not hear from me anymore
not from a suicide

but from a sense that
I finally connect with people
in an empathic way

i am not tactful
i am not that sophisticated
I am just a caveman

i bludgeon with words
trying to fashion spears
and crack the marrow from

the English bones... mistakes
I have not forgiven myself for
having a hard time letting go

slights, over the edge, blocking
feeling blocked, needing release
i know sympathy is a tired thing

only gained through self interest
we are all self interested
if you could cut my throat

in a dark alley to feed your crack habit, you would
burroughs said, wouldn't you?

you'd kill, lie, cheat, steal
to feed your habit, who speaks in toungues...

is there a choice anymore?
but to clam up and die in a corner or

accept the sickness
and die fighting and perhaps
I might bloody win after all

let there be long codes
standards writing wisdom to
the times, as we get

older human nature
does not change, no matter
how old we get

some will be social
some will be at peace alone
this is the way of things

the social are in my mind
basically afraid to be alone
and afraid to leave others

alone

because they fear boredom
and they don't have original
thoughts because they

feel individuality and thinking
for themselves because they
fear rejection... I am not
sure if I want acceptance

I do not want to act
violently to society but
i just want a chance

to figure out who I am
in that society and a compulsion
to write these issues out here

repetitively over and over
has brought out people who don't really care about my

life and i am selfish in my own
way but I feel that people like
yourselves also have selfish

motives based on a desire
to do this or that in a setting
and to get away from a social
group that resentments are
boost on requires to stop

feeding the troll...

if I was a genuinely mean
guy you'd blame yourselves
I won't become evil

I'm too good at being annoying

the overplayed the
oversensitive victim
grows up or dies out

when I leave here and don't respond to this website i have peace of mind because i know I haven't allowed people to needle me and I think that people have access to my life that makes it think it's ok if i let them but if I stole your identity, knew how to hack into your private lives, psychologically led someone you loved into an insane asylum, this is the paradox of chatrooms, bullietin boards, e-mails, webservers, social groups. Social groups play games and on line they are cliquish, clubbish and much like the social groups in high school. In the case of on line a narrowing sense of lack of anonymity is forcing people to mature. Now the entire time I've been here I've tried that only to be called "mad," to have my weaknesses rubbed in my face, and my writing suffers as a result. I give up on trying to figure you people out... Go figure yourselves out, my writing is my business if I ever get a bloody book out and stop playing the victim to morons who think "because you let them" precludes "do unto others..."

when the pot boils
turn that heart down to simmer
making a great stew

little cute people
gorgeous faces spreading love
tomorrow's children

laughter above clouds
below ground roots have their stand
free falling seems fine

out of print underline
recognizable by black
mark of trace machine

use action button
here you will learn to fire
practice on target

loads of makeup on
going to the doc to score
some there..lady things

I have no doubt dear
the last one won't work so well
decision hour

sincerity false
some box's are too easy
been there done that

things i've confirmed here :
i'm too sorry for myself
and you rub it in

bottle cap conducts
scince fair business is such
it's pretty peaceful

your love light shined through
saw the world within U 2
issues are on me

lit fused with a con
just dreaming to breathe..see
that's confused -AD

Sleep deprivation
perchance, dream Abigail's theme
but herself could see

going down alone
sensational one peril
piper's danger zone

edges of selfish
where you leave no legacy
for babes to swallow

Get a grip on life
Your interpretation

Only thing to say
Haiku is but one stanza
Jesus fucking christ

why are you people so unspiritual and why do i let you get to me when I should be minding my own business even trying to think that you'll accept anything i saw without a hint of Satanic mockery or a desire for revenge or resentment

let's hope I mean this
this time...goodbye?

an excersise in
ricochet jitterbug jazz
anything in hand

people I admire
mostly smell funny and don't
get outside too much

it's a big mistake
insulting alligator
afer river cross

either way you are
do it regret it or don't
she stands in fire

the 1st grape was sweet
in search again through bitters
til sweet arises