a mod like a god
needs to be original
hiya kitty cat

Say No to Racism campaign
That slow poor fish had to
Cut off the entire match!

Zidane was right
If you don't play fair
You can't win none

Crazy about B.A., platonically though
She knows it too
Not in this lifetime

Tick-tock, ya don

Hands at ten and two
Life equals a steering wheel
I drive with my knee

Believe it or not
The word 'gullible' is not
In dictionary

Sun rose this morning
Five Fucking Fifteen AM
Much too bright to sleep

Simultaneous
Ticker tape braille for the blind
Hearing foreign films

beneath a full moon
i contemplate the future
it's like, whatever

Soft dappled green light
Shafts of sunlight pierce the trees
My Midsummer dream
*
The woods smell so fresh
The first clean smell after rain
Enchanted I sit

Beautiful woman
Softly her arms hold me close
She

Needle like Shower
My naked sleepy skin screams
Exhausted I wash
*
Five hours of Salsa
I ache from my head to toe
But it was fun though

All the worlds a stage
And all the people are actors
I bags I

small lizards scatter
mambas lurk in the green bush
i need a shower

nothing personal
but i'm not talking to you
or to someone else

There's one golden rule
"Don't start land wars in Asia"
There. Is that so hard?

Poets are liars
Haikuists tell only truth
Odd that both are true

We are so lonely
Lonely - we live as we breathe
As we breathe, alone

Fuck this, today's half
gone and all I've done is come
downstairs to make tea.

You talkin' to me?
For this type of (bad) haiku
just counting's required.

no conversation
i'm not sure you have the skills
not that i can tell

Familiar has just
three syllables the way that
I say it, so there!

Words work hard for me:
Echelons, gnomicism,
Troglodyte, Frisbee.

My girl is love sick.
Does that make me an illness
infecting a wound?

Haiku: thoughts and words
Thoughts that breathe, and words that burn
Not the crap I write

Paracetamol,
gets u well. Hugs and kisses
make you feel better!!

Through my elbow skin
You can feel a screw - I'm
metalled up inside.

I love the way you
walk, with purpose; love how you
smile, and blow kisses.

Isn't it strange that
someone you've just met can feel
So damned familiar?

I was hungover.
You made me feel much better
with your slow kisses.

It's twenty past one
and raining outside. Pass time
writing Bad Haiku.

You want to know me?
Truth is you can

ah, young limerence
romantic priapism
then nihilism

My girl can Haiku!!
My goddess of poetry,
with lovely boobies!!

Most of my poems
are too long to put on here,
so I wrote this one.

Can

If only all cocks
were as lovely as yours babe,
more girls would suck cock.

Moribund Cretins
Etymology: Christians
Bound for God's right flank

the west can't resile
if they think you'll go fissile
it's hit or missile

stop wailing japan
it's scientific research
no need to blubber

My new girl is great!
day and night she makes me smile!
(And she sucks my cock)!

Independance Day
Happy Birthday U.S.A.
Born on July 4th

Independance Day
Will and Jeff helped save the World
Kicked alien ass

-- Inspired by the movie ID4

i am above you
but i might be below you
wherever i am

I know little
Of your lives - filtered as they
Are through bad haiku.

Who are you? Where? Why?
Serbo-Croats, Canadians
and sundry others.

Please tell me about
Yourselves through bad haiku.
I am curious.

I am Phlegmy - I
Expectorate. Now your
Turn: 5 - 7 - 5.

That's how much you get
To tell me who you are, your
Essence, etc.

Deep very deep man
Hammers and hairs scary man
You use nail polish?

Deep very deep man
Hammers and hairs scary man
You use nail polish?

the wind blows my hair
my hair begins to give up
now my head is clear

pull out my hammer
sharpen those iron nails
deliver them home

I un-screw the top
and stick my hands together
now I cannot clap

random thoughts persist
though i have nothing to say
you aren't listening