Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
27 Years, 344 Days and 77325 Haiku later...

But oh no, you just
had to write these Bad Haiku
Haiku # 29936, May 2, 2003 2:47 am ET
by William Nippress
If you had only
concentrated on your world
domination plans
Haiku # 29935, May 2, 2003 2:45 am ET
by William Nippress
Which will be filled by
people with less talent but
better strategies
Haiku # 29934, May 2, 2003 2:42 am ET
by William Nippress
Too late, you missed your
Chance, for now there
Haiku # 29933, May 2, 2003 2:38 am ET
by William Nippress
Far better to move
swiftly and take over the
world now while you can
Haiku # 29932, May 2, 2003 2:35 am ET
by William Nippress
They
Haiku # 29931, May 2, 2003 2:35 am ET
by William Nippress
Weird rout to power
SF Undermining his
own strange powerbase
Haiku # 29930, May 2, 2003 2:34 am ET
by William Nippress
tweeking is the word
scratching my scabs till i'm raw
for the fun of it
Haiku # 29929, May 1, 2003 6:40 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
someone shut me up
take crystal meth for head aches
you're in for a ride
Haiku # 29928, May 1, 2003 6:33 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
Just think like this then
The more german I write now
The better I get
When I visit there
In two years time for a year
I'll pull more women
Haiku # 29927, May 1, 2003 5:19 pm ET
by A Student of Oral, you say? Although the chances of that will still be atrociously slim.
Unternarr mit Senf
Keine Schokolade und
Viel Kinderso
Haiku # 29926, May 1, 2003 5:16 pm ET
by A Student of Du hast Haiku geschlachtet
and this is my life
i would force it on no one
it would be too cruel
Haiku # 29925, May 1, 2003 5:15 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
which is more painless
marriage kids and minivans
or an open vein
Haiku # 29924, May 1, 2003 5:08 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
unlike most straight males
i blow my load instantly
and proud of it too
Haiku # 29923, May 1, 2003 4:54 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
why fake orgasms
i don't care if she has one
it's all about me
Haiku # 29922, May 1, 2003 4:48 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
i agree with you
vanilla coca cola
does taste like semen
Haiku # 29921, May 1, 2003 4:43 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
my room is a mess
a model of entropy
but that is nature
Haiku # 29920, May 1, 2003 4:26 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
because death is death
a coffin would be needless
the ditch will do fine
Haiku # 29919, May 1, 2003 4:06 pm ET
by sexually frustrated (no funeral)
an awful language
full of spit and choking sounds
butchers all haiku
Haiku # 29918, May 1, 2003 3:54 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
a teutonic plague
abandon your beastly words
before i thrash you
Haiku # 29917, May 1, 2003 3:51 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
Nein nein nein nein nein
Ich sto
Haiku # 29916, May 1, 2003 3:50 pm ET
by A Student of Damn you, similar english spellings
Ich sto
Haiku # 29915, May 1, 2003 3:49 pm ET
by A Student of Ich, der Meisterstoßer, niederstoßen Sie
tireless nipples
drinking breast milk for hours
till i get my fill
Haiku # 29914, May 1, 2003 3:47 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
Ich stie
Haiku # 29913, May 1, 2003 3:44 pm ET
by A Student of Aber ich habe die Katze geschürt
Ja, meinen Affe
Ist zu gro
Haiku # 29912, May 1, 2003 3:40 pm ET
by A Student of Ich bin der Meisterstoßer!! Verbeugen Sie zu mir!
so i was lying
plan A was also plan B
and it never fail
Haiku # 29911, May 1, 2003 3:39 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
i've had a good life
though you may not believe it
now leave me alone
Haiku # 29910, May 1, 2003 3:35 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
That surprises me
That you had a plan A too
What would that have been?
Haiku # 29909, May 1, 2003 3:34 pm ET
by A Student of Was that going to be without the drugs?
just back that thing up
i didn't mean you fat girl
oh christ here she comes
Haiku # 29908, May 1, 2003 3:20 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
i'll get lung cancer
buy some prescription ganja
smoke myself to death
Haiku # 29907, May 1, 2003 3:08 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
chocalate when your stoned
flavor extravaganza
pleasure overload
Haiku # 29906, May 1, 2003 3:03 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
a hundred dollars
for a quarter ounce of weed
worth every penny
Haiku # 29905, May 1, 2003 3:01 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
it's quite a burden
being masculine that is
i can't wear makeup
Haiku # 29904, May 1, 2003 3:00 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
i must fend them off
horny coeds flock to me
one at a time girls
Haiku # 29903, May 1, 2003 2:50 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
worst blow job ever
wild badgers are more gentle
i'll be sore for days
Haiku # 29902, May 1, 2003 2:46 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
the date has gone wrong
i switch over to plan b
drug her and fuck her
Haiku # 29901, May 1, 2003 2:42 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
i'll go to japan
and study zen for a while
perhaps i'll be cured
Haiku # 29900, May 1, 2003 2:40 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
why am i so hot
i really can't answer that
just nature i guess
Haiku # 29899, May 1, 2003 2:39 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
I am from the rough streets of
Compton (represent!) I had no
daddy. Mamma raised us 7 kids
workin 3 jobs. I ran with the gangs
and now I am a lawyer.....
Go figure
Haiku # 29898, May 1, 2003 2:04 pm ET
by Leotis Smith-Sharrington of Los Angeles
PENCIL NECK GEEKS YOU ARE,
NEVER GONNA GET TO FAR,
MAYBE MEET A HO IN A BAR,
THEN TAKE HER HOME IN YOUR CAR
THEN THE U.S. AND IRAQ AT WAR
YOU HAVE GONE TOO FAR,
SHMIZZLE SHMAZZLE SHMARRR
Haiku # 29897, May 1, 2003 2:00 pm ET
by HIP HOP of COMPTON
Shizm my Nizm,
Wankstagankstamasta
Haiku # 29896, May 1, 2003 1:58 pm ET
by doobie of va
sexually frustrated is a punk,
smells like a skunk,
with no slam dunk,
what a chump,
on the head is a bump,
he is a lump
Haiku # 29895, May 1, 2003 1:57 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
crows and a vulture
sharing same squirrel, maybe we
can all get along
Haiku # 29894, May 1, 2003 12:17 pm ET
by onjaysun (symbolism?...schmymbolism!)
so i returned from
new orleans...jazz fest, there's
no words for it all.....

except....fuck off moxie!
Haiku # 29893, May 1, 2003 5:01 am ET
by k
Nearly seven years -
I certainly deserve this,
but this can't go on...
Haiku # 29892, May 1, 2003 4:59 am ET
by R. of PT
That shouldn't take so long...
One year became three, then six -
Please, please, have this stop!
Haiku # 29891, May 1, 2003 4:08 am ET
by R. of PT
I'll rephrase it here:
how long can this mad story
keep go on like this?
Haiku # 29890, May 1, 2003 4:02 am ET
by R. of PT
Ten years old is fun,
then twenty, thirty, forty.
What does happen then?
Haiku # 29889, May 1, 2003 4:00 am ET
by R. of PT
If everyone knew
about the drinking and the sex
they
Haiku # 29888, May 1, 2003 3:53 am ET
by William Nippress
Ich habe den Affe
Und es ist schneller als dich
Aber nicht so gro
Haiku # 29887, May 1, 2003 3:44 am ET
by A Student of Linford Christie ist nicht so schnell wie meinen Affe
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