Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
27 Years, 310 Days and 77277 Haiku later...

hardly touched the cap
used paper napkin to pump
hands STILL smell like gas
Haiku # 250, June 10, 1997 2:09 pm ET
by Mick of Tor,
Who's the cat you won't
cop out when there is danger all
about? Shaft. Right On !
Haiku # 249, June 9, 1997 11:24 pm ET
by Issac Hayes of Toronto, Canada
A rat is trying
to Gnaw it's way out of my
uterus. Mydol ?
Haiku # 248, June 9, 1997 11:22 pm ET
by Terence G. of Toronto, Canada

Knowing what you want
by giving you
more than you expect
Haiku # 247, June 6, 1997 12:00 pm ET
by Thumby of New York, USA
I hear the Spam ball
It bounces, porqua, porqua
A haiku of Spring
Haiku # 246, June 5, 1997 2:07 pm ET
by -B. Tallen
Vanilla Ice, Man
The Hottest New Thang in Rap
Say hi to yer Mom
Haiku # 245, June 5, 1997 11:30 am ET
by Kavin Labin of Toron, Adanac

Angela
Haiku # 244, June 5, 1997 6:58 am ET
by angelabs@micron.net
Worldly things will pass
Like petals on the wind. Still,
O.J. chaps my butt.
Haiku # 243, June 1, 1997 2:41 am ET
by Chris
Worldly things will pass
Like petals on the wind. Still,
O.J. chaps by mutt.
Haiku # 242, June 1, 1997 2:41 am ET
by Chris
Worldly things will pass
Like petals on the wind. Still,
O.J. chaps by mutt.
Haiku # 241, June 1, 1997 2:40 am ET
by Chris
Purple caretaker
Beloved but repetitive
Barney dies today
Haiku # 240, June 1, 1997 2:34 am ET
by Chris
Girl-child, why do you
Cry and wail and carry on?
Elmo giggles not.
Chris
Haiku # 239, June 1, 1997 2:32 am ET
by dcchris750@aol.com
Girl-child, why do you
Cry and wail and carry on?
Elmo giggles not.
Chris
Haiku # 238, June 1, 1997 2:31 am ET
by dcchris750@aol.com
My goldfish Sparky
Went belly up as I worked.
Toilet of sorrow.
Haiku # 237, June 1, 1997 2:29 am ET
by Chris
My goldfish Sparky
Went belly up as I worked.
Toilet of sorrow.
Haiku # 236, June 1, 1997 2:29 am ET
by Chris
My goldfish Sparky
Went belly up as I worked.
Toilet of sorrow.
Haiku # 235, June 1, 1997 2:28 am ET
by Chris
All of yall's haikus
SUCK
mine don't
Haiku # 234, May 31, 1997 8:47 pm ET
by Get Nude
roses are red
How in the HELL
do you write a haiku
Haiku # 233, May 31, 1997 8:39 pm ET
by GET NUDE of Dunwoody, N. America
Flowers bloom in field
Sprouting all over the place
Like boils on my ass
Haiku # 232, May 28, 1997 3:12 pm ET
by Slappy Center Square,
Rush is an ass-wipe!
Ignorant fans clap like seals!
Cracker rat bastards!
Haiku # 231, May 28, 1997 3:05 pm ET
by The Notorious K.I.D. of Straight Outta Compton,
Haiku is the best
Maybe one thing is better:
That's Naked Haiku
Haiku # 230, May 28, 1997 2:55 pm ET
by The Notorious K.I.D. of L.A. Face, Oakland Booty
Die, Alanis, Die
Teenage angst has paid off well
No green card for you
Haiku # 229, May 28, 1997 2:49 pm ET
by The Notorious K.I.D. of Loverville, Planet Funktron
Marv, say it ain't so!
Funny sports guy or prevert?
I say "closet freak"
Haiku # 228, May 28, 1997 1:18 pm ET
by Nipsey of Atlanta, USA! USA! USA!
So close, yet so far
I met the girl of my dream
Too bad she is twelve
Haiku # 227, May 28, 1997 1:13 pm ET
by Nipsey of Atlanta, USA! USA! USA!
He's a bad mother...
But I'm talkin' about Shaft!
Then we can dig it
Haiku # 226, May 28, 1997 1:08 pm ET
by Nipsey of Atlanta, USA! USA! USA!
im leaving so soon
but i swear i will be back
YOU CAN MARK MY WORDS.
Haiku # 225, May 22, 1997 3:50 pm ET
by vixen of toronto,
i c an 't sp
el l or co u n t
t h is su cks
Haiku # 224, May 22, 1997 2:33 am ET
by Pheonix of Angwin, U.S.A
my dad calls me an
ingrate. but an ingrate is
better than inbread
Haiku # 223, May 22, 1997 2:31 am ET
by Pheonix of Angwin, U.S.A
i relly hate my damn
computer. it sucks relly hard!
i can't think of sh-
Haiku # 222, May 22, 1997 2:27 am ET
by Pheonix of Angwin, U.S.A
The hardest thing with
Haiku is that you run out
of room before you're
Matt Abraham
Haiku # 221, May 16, 1997 12:42 pm ET
by matt_a@hotmail.com of Toronto, Canada
I used to work
for you guys
now i don't
Haiku # 220, May 6, 1997 1:38 pm ET
by jamie wilkes of toronto, Canada
My Moths seem to be
Obsessed with negative space
Do they ever tire?
Haiku # 219, April 29, 1997 2:24 am ET
by Tom "flying eratically" Third of in a very dusty location, rturning my moth friends to the elements by squishing em
Moths eating my rice
Moths eating my coolest clothes
Fucking Omnivores
Haiku # 218, April 29, 1997 2:18 am ET
by Tom "Dialzinone, and Napthalene" Third of amongst the bugs, looking for the queen -
yo, brother Rip Van
stop your chillin, wake up, and
get with the program
Haiku # 217, April 29, 1997 2:11 am ET
by Tom "Ripped, Vanned, and Winkled" Third of somewhere in the catskills, the picturesque catskills
Wake up Mr Bear
Stop hibernating will you!
Go get fat and mate
Haiku # 216, April 29, 1997 2:03 am ET
by Tom "Ursa Minor" Third of somewhere in the woods, the great north woods
My home address is
2097 Middle Road
in East Greenwich, RI
Haiku # 215, April 28, 1997 7:10 pm ET
by Jack of East Greenwich, United States
I can't write Haiku
Counting syllables is hard
Aw, just forget it
Haiku # 214, April 28, 1997 12:10 pm ET
by Matt Abraham of Toronto, CANADA
all your haiku's suck
suck your old grandmas big butt
Ive made my main point
Haiku # 213, April 25, 1997 2:35 pm ET
by amos of yousuck enterprise, jamaka
All your haiku's suck
suck your no good grandmas butt
And thats my main point
Haiku # 212, April 25, 1997 2:28 pm ET
by Amos of you suck Enterprise, America

I drink beer from a skull
I'm a Dane from Biscayne
who feels no viking shame
Haiku # 210, April 20, 1997 1:28 am ET
by T.S. Eliot of muncie, USA
I gave the grocer
the money and then stabbed
him in the nuts. Ouch.
Haiku # 209, April 9, 1997 3:11 am ET
by The Frog of Santa Clara, United States
We Call my sis "ANG"
It is short for Anglea
I do not know why
Haiku # 208, April 7, 1997 4:10 pm ET
by Joe Story of Bentonville, US
A thought went through my
mind, briefly. The next day it
bit me on the nose.
Haiku # 207, April 5, 1997 11:24 pm ET
by The Ambassador of Poetry of San Jose, America
I am now bleeding
Self mutilation is cool
I have many scars
Haiku # 206, April 5, 1997 6:31 pm ET
by Opehlia Bean of Canada
I have a big gun
Very loudly it goes bang
you are now quite dead
Haiku # 205, April 5, 1997 6:28 pm ET
by Opehlia Bean of Canada
My baby left me
She ran off with some dumb guy
Who ironed his shirts
Haiku # 204, March 31, 1997 10:13 pm ET
by Mark McCarvill of Ottawa, Canada
I hate to iron
So I buy those wrinkle-free
White shirts at The Bay
Haiku # 203, March 31, 1997 10:10 pm ET
by Mark McCarvill of Ottawa, Canada
This is far too bad
to be called a bad Haiku.
It is simply shit.
Haiku # 202, March 28, 1997 4:25 am ET
by Danny Lieblich of Tel-Aviv, Israel
Headlights project yellow
circles on dark black asphalt
State Trooper in trunk
Haiku # 201, March 27, 1997 1:45 pm ET
by Lib Lib Libin of Toronto, Canada
The alarm goes off
As my head begins to ring
I reach for my ADVIL
Haiku # 200, March 27, 1997 1:27 pm ET
by Juliet of New York, America
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