Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
27 Years, 310 Days and 77277 Haiku later...

Wake up Mr Bear
Stop hibernating will you!
Go get fat and mate
Haiku # 216, April 29, 1997 2:03 am ET
by Tom "Ursa Minor" Third of somewhere in the woods, the great north woods
My home address is
2097 Middle Road
in East Greenwich, RI
Haiku # 215, April 28, 1997 7:10 pm ET
by Jack of East Greenwich, United States
I can't write Haiku
Counting syllables is hard
Aw, just forget it
Haiku # 214, April 28, 1997 12:10 pm ET
by Matt Abraham of Toronto, CANADA
all your haiku's suck
suck your old grandmas big butt
Ive made my main point
Haiku # 213, April 25, 1997 2:35 pm ET
by amos of yousuck enterprise, jamaka
All your haiku's suck
suck your no good grandmas butt
And thats my main point
Haiku # 212, April 25, 1997 2:28 pm ET
by Amos of you suck Enterprise, America

I drink beer from a skull
I'm a Dane from Biscayne
who feels no viking shame
Haiku # 210, April 20, 1997 1:28 am ET
by T.S. Eliot of muncie, USA
I gave the grocer
the money and then stabbed
him in the nuts. Ouch.
Haiku # 209, April 9, 1997 3:11 am ET
by The Frog of Santa Clara, United States
We Call my sis "ANG"
It is short for Anglea
I do not know why
Haiku # 208, April 7, 1997 4:10 pm ET
by Joe Story of Bentonville, US
A thought went through my
mind, briefly. The next day it
bit me on the nose.
Haiku # 207, April 5, 1997 11:24 pm ET
by The Ambassador of Poetry of San Jose, America
I am now bleeding
Self mutilation is cool
I have many scars
Haiku # 206, April 5, 1997 6:31 pm ET
by Opehlia Bean of Canada
I have a big gun
Very loudly it goes bang
you are now quite dead
Haiku # 205, April 5, 1997 6:28 pm ET
by Opehlia Bean of Canada
My baby left me
She ran off with some dumb guy
Who ironed his shirts
Haiku # 204, March 31, 1997 10:13 pm ET
by Mark McCarvill of Ottawa, Canada
I hate to iron
So I buy those wrinkle-free
White shirts at The Bay
Haiku # 203, March 31, 1997 10:10 pm ET
by Mark McCarvill of Ottawa, Canada
This is far too bad
to be called a bad Haiku.
It is simply shit.
Haiku # 202, March 28, 1997 4:25 am ET
by Danny Lieblich of Tel-Aviv, Israel
Headlights project yellow
circles on dark black asphalt
State Trooper in trunk
Haiku # 201, March 27, 1997 1:45 pm ET
by Lib Lib Libin of Toronto, Canada
The alarm goes off
As my head begins to ring
I reach for my ADVIL
Haiku # 200, March 27, 1997 1:27 pm ET
by Juliet of New York, America
price check isle seven
is that the line i am in
damn! it has to be
Haiku # 199, March 26, 1997 12:26 pm ET
by kevin l of raleigh,
i stand in the line
at the local wal-mart store
i wait patiently
Haiku # 198, March 26, 1997 12:25 pm ET
by kevin l. of raleigh, usa
And here is the cat!
wearing dust and crappy rocks
he walks on my face.
Haiku # 197, March 26, 1997 2:54 am ET
by mel of Oakland, USA
Thank you o thank you
For your super haiku page
It brings me great joy
Haiku # 196, March 25, 1997 9:08 am ET
by chloeeeeeeee of Brighton, East Sussex, england
Tubby polar bears
do not drink Coca-Cola
but they will eat kids
Haiku # 195, March 24, 1997 2:43 pm ET
by David Carter of Minneapolis, USA
people who can't count
as high as five or seven
should not write haiku!
Haiku # 194, March 24, 1997 12:04 pm ET
by sarah felts of naples, italy
Brave Moonlight Sails thru Storm
clouds, but I was busy
watching David Letterman
Haiku # 193, March 22, 1997 8:38 am ET
by Ray of Grand Ledge,
The Rain Drips Slowly
A Sad Face At the Window
The Years are Hidden
Haiku # 192, March 21, 1997 7:53 pm ET
by Chloe of Brighton, England
The Rain Drips Slowly
A Sad Face At the Window
The Years are Hidden
Haiku # 191, March 21, 1997 7:52 pm ET
by Chloe of Brighton, England
Night before Christmas:
There's no stirring in the house;
Even the mice sleep.
Haiku # 190, March 18, 1997 10:45 am ET
by Eric Schulman of Charlottesville, USA
And what is realty?
It's the buying and selling
Of houses and land.
Haiku # 189, March 18, 1997 10:38 am ET
by Eric Schulman of Charlottesville, USA
Middle of winter
I think I am a snowflake
Or maybe I don't
Haiku # 188, March 16, 1997 9:39 pm ET
by Fearless of Seattle,
Hot, wet sultry night
odor of musk assail the nose
peed my pants again
Haiku # 187, March 14, 1997 3:01 pm ET
by K. Farrelly of Philadelphia, USA
Manly features caught,
jumping fences higher than high
primal scream springs forth
Haiku # 186, March 11, 1997 4:46 pm ET
by Clark Kent of Smallville, USA
People laugh alot
reality is funny
I cannot get caught
Haiku # 185, March 11, 1997 1:07 pm ET
by Biz-r the artistic of Toronto, Canada
People laugh alot
reality is funny
I cannot get caught
Haiku # 184, March 11, 1997 1:06 pm ET
by Biz-r the artistic of Toronto, Canada
Doberman's teeth snap
biting butt cheeks' supple flesh
primal scream springs forth
Haiku # 183, March 10, 1997 1:33 pm ET
by Stanley Blacker of West Chester, USA
Hello from the West
I had fun visiting you
Hope to talk again
Haiku # 182, March 9, 1997 8:46 pm ET
by Alberta boy -
just for the fun o'
it. I'll remain in this place
or elsee I'm cabbage.
Haiku # 181, March 9, 1997 3:45 am ET
by John Clelland of Waterloo, Canada
A bad po em is
one thing. A bad Hai ku adds
up to sev en teen
Haiku # 180, March 7, 1997 1:58 pm ET
by Matt of Toronto the good, Canada
It's been awhile since
I submitted a Haiku.
So then here is two
Haiku # 179, March 7, 1997 1:54 pm ET
by Matt of The Megacity , Canada
man with a gun
shoot me in head
oh, the pain!!!
Haiku # 178, March 3, 1997 1:44 am ET
by Bernie of okc, usa
Lack of Breast
As the laser points and bullet enters your breast
your breast, you scream. Pieces of breast
fall in my mouth. Rather chewy.
Haiku # 177, March 1, 1997 4:57 pm ET
by Jeff Rasmussen of Elgin, USA
Haiku removed at author's request.
Haiku # 176, March 1, 1997 4:54 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet of Elgin, USA
She was small, white, round
Like that perfumed piece of soap
In the urinal
Haiku # 175, March 1, 1997 1:51 pm ET
by David Carter
Cigarette butt caught in
urinal's screen, still,
here I drain the lizard
Haiku # 174, March 1, 1997 1:51 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet of hurtsville, USA
GRRR
i pity you fool
grrRR
Haiku # 173, March 1, 1997 1:51 pm ET
by MR.T of hurtsville, USA
Our Sweet Lord who conquers all
He loves you too, babe.
Haiku # 172, January 31, 1997 11:55 pm ET
by Mr. Ed's Bad Pete Sampras Haiku Ltd. of Montréal,
Dried salt on my windshield
oriental brush strokes
made by heavy road equipment
Haiku # 171, January 31, 1997 3:06 pm ET
by Ray of Grand Ledge,
Hawks hover, soar, pose above
stark winter tree,
no liquor sales till noon, Sunday
Haiku # 170, January 31, 1997 3:01 pm ET
by Ray of Grand Ledge,
Old people drive so
slowly that I want to hit
them upside the head
Haiku # 169, January 30, 1997 6:47 pm ET
by Saurav Sarkar of Great Neck, USA
darkness surrounds me
again the dumpster my friend
stupid mafia
Haiku # 168, January 24, 1997 4:58 pm ET
by David Carter of Minneapolis, USA
I love the women
The women love me so much
I have gone crazy.
(Sean done knew that!!!!)
Haiku # 167, January 21, 1997 2:56 pm ET
by Hawkeye of Hickville, USA
I am thinking now
I can't think of a good word
to end this haiku.
Haiku # 166, January 21, 1997 2:55 pm ET
by Samuel Clemens of Booville, USA
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