BAD HAIKU - Horrible poetry for the digital age
22 Years
9 Days
and
61053 Haikus
later...
things aren't working
like I'd like because i let
others help me out
Haiku #60105, by vhs
October 12, 2018 9:34 pm ET

disgust, fear, anger
frustration, demonstrations
rhetoric
Haiku #60104, by vhs
October 12, 2018 9:31 pm ET

Haikupotamous
Plugged up Snuffleupagus
Giant Enema
Haiku #60103, by Anonymous Poet
October 12, 2018 7:17 pm ET

Wringing my hands now
How could God let this happen
Why is He so mean?
Haiku #60102, by Creeped out of Not in Church
October 12, 2018 7:14 pm ET

Neanderthal child
Sesame Street on Lockdown
Big Bird ate the kid
Haiku #60101, by Roving Reporter John Boy Walton's mole of John Boy Walton's face
October 12, 2018 7:12 pm ET

Just ate a burger
I figure nothing to lose
Morgellons. It's Hell
Haiku #60100, by A living Hell of Disease
October 12, 2018 7:01 pm ET

I want hamburgers.
I know, beef is bad for you.
As bad as Thai whores?

Raw, bloody, with AIDS,
and addicted to strange drugs.
The cows, not the whores.
Haiku #60099, by DARTH FIGPUCKER
October 12, 2018 6:37 pm ET

I would be jailed there
My feet are very ugly
They don't smell bad though
Haiku #60098, by Anonymous Poet
October 12, 2018 6:34 pm ET

What I liked best was
the stir-fried insects, but don't
buy from street vendors.

Too much MSG.
I like my bugs natural.
Honest bug dealer.

heh heh...
Haiku #60097, by DARTH FIGPUCKER
October 12, 2018 6:30 pm ET

Leaving wife and kids?
Gautauma Sidhartha would
know all about that.

He whored around too.
Said he was under a tree.
They believed that shit!

Say that in Thailand
and you'll spend life in prison.
Fucking religion.
Haiku #60096, by DARTH FIGPUCKER
October 12, 2018 6:26 pm ET

Bite the monkeys back.
Your responsibility.
You have to teach them.
Haiku #60095, by DARTH FIGPUCKER
October 12, 2018 6:20 pm ET

A whiz with numbers
Born with eleven fingers
That's just on one hand
Haiku #60094, by Human Calculator
October 12, 2018 5:49 pm ET

Old Mr. Fritzl
Enjoyed Thailand Vacation
Left the family home
Haiku #60093, by Dungeons and Daughters Enthusiasts
October 12, 2018 3:56 pm ET

I have a webbed ass
The crack starts. Stops. Starts again.
Thank you for your time
Haiku #60092, by Slightly Webbed Ass Cracks of PNW
October 12, 2018 3:52 pm ET

The biting monkeys
Attacked them on Thailand trip
Extended Vacay
Haiku #60091, by For course of rabies shots of Monkey business
October 12, 2018 3:50 pm ET

Haiku of Hardware
Refrigerators
More bad refrigerators
Refrigerator
Haiku #60090, by Johny Johny of Texas
October 12, 2018 3:17 pm ET

One Mississipi
Two Mississipi rivers
Three Mississipi
(Haiku of Waiting)
Haiku #60089, by Johny Johny of Texas
October 12, 2018 3:15 pm ET

Poems are weird
Haikus are way weirder than-
Limited syllab-
Haiku #60088, by Johny Johny of Texas
October 12, 2018 3:14 pm ET

Been to Thailand twice.
The sex and the food are great.
I recommend it.
Haiku #60087, by df
October 12, 2018 2:18 pm ET

They stopped for Funyuns
Shared impulse to rob the store
Clerk tied to a chair
Haiku #60086, by Anonymous Poet
October 12, 2018 1:30 pm ET

Honk Honk Honk Honk Honk
Autumn Goose Festival Time
Honk Honk Honk Honk Honk
Haiku #60085, by Starkitten
October 12, 2018 12:42 pm ET

Imagine D.P.
Moved to Thailand for the sex
Or was it the food?
Haiku #60084, by Anonymous Poet
October 12, 2018 12:15 pm ET

The clock is ticking.
Thirty minutes to whore time.
Suck that dollar dick.

Mathematical
prostitution profession
makes me hate people.

Guess it beats starving.
Got bills to feed, kids to pay.
Or something like that.

Fucking straight lines.
y equals m x plus b.
Who can't do that shit?!

Rich spoiled Arabs.
Oil wealth makes them lazy.
Lucky me, I guess.
Haiku #60083, by DARTH FIGPUCKER
October 12, 2018 7:35 am ET

The Sphinx's sphincter
Don't want blue tincture pee pee.
Drinked her blue lotus.
Haiku #60082, by DARTH FIGPUCKER
October 12, 2018 7:27 am ET

Finally reached the Sphinx
Tried to fuck it up the ass
Never left the couch
Haiku #60081, by Anonymous Poet
October 12, 2018 5:41 am ET

Sand in my anus
Soldiering on. Sunburnt crisp.
Stopped to wank once
Haiku #60080, by Wanker
October 12, 2018 5:13 am ET

Unbelievable
Epic crotch rot and chafing
Crossing the desert
Haiku #60079, by Anonymous Poet
October 12, 2018 5:10 am ET

Don't drink the water
We were thirsty. Drank it all
Started pissing blue
Haiku #60078, by Toxic
October 12, 2018 5:01 am ET

Bone dry camel's dung
Crumbled. Rolled up in Zig Zags
Walked like Egyptians
Haiku #60077, by Dung smokers
October 12, 2018 4:56 am ET

Monsters at the gate.
Should I allow them access?
They enjoy my flute.
Haiku #60076, by DARTH FIGPUCKER
October 12, 2018 4:56 am ET

Hoisted her hiney.
Tiny shiny vaginy.
Tastes rather briny.
Haiku #60075, by DARTH FIGPUCKER
October 12, 2018 4:54 am ET

They oft eat sea food,
retaining much mercury,
dulling their IQ.
Haiku #60074, by DARTH FIGPUCKER
October 12, 2018 4:40 am ET

Hannibal Lecter's
in the mood for a rude dude
to become fine food.
Haiku #60073, by DARTH FIGPUCKER
October 12, 2018 4:38 am ET

Promiscuity.
Puerile penile projectile. ~o ~o
Prematurity.
Haiku #60072, by DARTH FIGPUCKER
October 12, 2018 4:28 am ET

It's customary
Vomit in your dinner plate
When finished dining
Haiku #60071, by Show gratitude to chef
October 12, 2018 4:21 am ET

Empty Rice Bowl Mind
Clear night for remote viewing
You'll get a stiff neck
Haiku #60070, by You should sit up straight
October 12, 2018 4:10 am ET

I have a bunch of small cuts
All over my hands and I'm worried
I'll get staph or MRSA
Haiku #60069, by Simpleton
October 12, 2018 3:57 am ET

The server at the Chinese food place
Is extremely flamboyant
Therefore I distrust him immensely
Haiku #60068, by Simpleton
October 12, 2018 3:57 am ET

Why aren't plastic goods
Made to be compostable?
It's like pollution is intentional
Haiku #60067, by Simpleton
October 12, 2018 3:56 am ET

When Hollywood goes full retard
They will begin to make remakes
Of their previous remakes
Haiku #60066, by Simpleton
October 12, 2018 3:54 am ET

Have you ever asked someone
How their day is going and then
Accidentally ask them again?
Haiku #60065, by Simpleton
October 12, 2018 3:51 am ET

This site is strange
I don't know what a haiku is
Or how I got here
Haiku #60064, by Simpleton
October 12, 2018 3:50 am ET

I enjoy other cultures
They have a variety of different foods
Which I like to eat
Haiku #60063, by Simpleton
October 12, 2018 3:50 am ET

Bubble up just lke...
Oh, you know where I'm going.
More toilet humor.

I know... sometimes life is too much.
I try to clean up litter in a 3rd world shithole and people look at me like I'm a lunatic. Almost wishing I'd stayed in the US. Might return some day... or maybe Europe or Australia. Tired of being around those who don't know and don't care and just point the way to the next 10 cent synthetic meal and glue huffers and too many hand held out to you, thinking you'll save them, not knowing they can do that themselves if only they would try.

Now you've got me started. Ah, life.
Haiku #60062, by DARTH FIGPUCKER
October 11, 2018 11:03 pm ET

DF Poor Eyesight
Brown Bubbles in Bathysphere
Smelly Aero Bar
Haiku #60061, by No worries of Car Wash
October 11, 2018 11:02 pm ET

i enjoyed writing
those "unhinged" poems, but it
was more cathartic

sometimes i feel those
things have to bubble up else
they will blow on up
Haiku #60060, by vhs
October 11, 2018 9:38 pm ET

sometimes people just
bearing their honests feelings
and thoughts....scary...
Haiku #60059, by vhs
October 11, 2018 9:34 pm ET

Oops, sorry 'bout that.
I swear I thought that was soap.
Hard and slippery.
Haiku #60058, by DARTH FIGPUCKER
October 11, 2018 8:22 pm ET

I hope you don't mind.
My farts make a Jacuzzi.
Pink stinky bubbles.
Haiku #60057, by DARTH FIGPUCKER
October 11, 2018 8:19 pm ET

My Haiku brothers
Hop in my pink bathysphere
Ride around the sea
Haiku #60056, by Friendly Starkitten of Pep Rally for our friend. Give me a V...H...S!!
October 11, 2018 7:36 pm ET