BAD HAIKU - Horrible poetry for the digital age
20 Years
254 Days
and
57051 Haikus
later...
Do not masturbate.
For that is against Jesus.
Instead kill sinners.
Haiku #56196, by df of 6400 chemin
March 8, 2017 10:23 pm ET

My wife's a fat pig.
Pigs are cute and smell better.
Think I'll buy a pig.
Haiku #56195, by Darth Figpucker of sunar damri
March 8, 2017 10:21 pm ET

lather, rinse, repeat
down my road to self defeat
turn around, retreat
Haiku #56194, by Anonymous Poet
March 8, 2017 10:05 pm ET

Beer will cure cancer.
Use it for blood transfusion.
Worked for my uncle.
Haiku #56193, by df of frei john
March 8, 2017 2:02 pm ET

well mead is good, some
claim but you know wiccan chats
girls named Silver Wolf

Fiona Ravenbrush,
or Skywise (wait that's Elfquest) ah
Wendy Pini, bows
Haiku #56192, by vhs
March 8, 2017 1:06 pm ET

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Haiku #56191, by Peterdus of Nepal
March 7, 2017 9:12 pm ET

*meet
... goddammit
Haiku #56190, by df of taurus allumez
March 7, 2017 8:32 pm ET

I have shit to do.
So until we meed again...
{Bends over and farts.}
Haiku #56189, by df of total safety
March 7, 2017 8:31 pm ET

Crocodile meat
isn't bad, but expensive
and a bit chewy.

Not as bad as squid.
I think you know what I mean.
Lean green jelly bean.
Haiku #56188, by df of whirl beaumont
March 7, 2017 8:25 pm ET

I'm in no mood for
being deep and shit today.
I want to eat dog.
Haiku #56187, by df of 6900 gaio
March 7, 2017 8:23 pm ET

Dinosaurs are cool.
If you could travel through time...
Jesus or T-Rex?

I'd bring them both back.
Let them fight on Pay-Per-View.
I'll take the lizard.
Haiku #56186, by df of 4270 lumbier
March 7, 2017 8:20 pm ET

I've said that before.
But I haven't said this yet.
I guess I just did.
Haiku #56185, by df of pague acorn
March 7, 2017 8:17 pm ET

I should be working.
Instead I'm drinking coffee.
For this I get paid.
Haiku #56184, by df of autorise delfin
March 7, 2017 8:15 pm ET

The witch's nose mole,
the shrill cackling laughter,
the rotting black teeth.

One should not visit
sickly whores of Siquijor;
they'll cook and eat you.
Haiku #56183, by df of birkhaven cham
March 7, 2017 8:14 pm ET

They start beautiful.
Then look more like pigs each day.
They eat too much pork.
Haiku #56182, by df of arar route
March 7, 2017 8:09 pm ET

Confucius once say
"Man who masturbates daily
has life well in hand."
Haiku #56181, by df of winder avenue
March 7, 2017 8:05 pm ET

After nine-one-one,
remember Bush's great speech?
nuclear fusion.
All the world's problems.
He solved in twenty minutes.
What an awesome dude!
Or a giant douche.
Not one of his predictions
ever came to be.
Problems can be solved.
But still more are created.
Cash in your chips now.
Haiku #56180, by df of calle public
March 7, 2017 8:03 pm ET

seems everyone wants
to write novels now, there's a damn
laptop with dreams of

being a romance
writer somewhere in a chinese
basement office
Haiku #56179, by vhs
March 7, 2017 1:20 pm ET

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Haiku #56178, by Peterdus of Nepal
March 6, 2017 8:03 pm ET

Hello!
Haiku #56177, by Anonymous Poet
March 6, 2017 5:15 pm ET

the world is now seen
to be full of nuts but the
shells are not off yet
Haiku #56176, by vhs of no comment
March 6, 2017 1:26 pm ET

oh doctor strangelove
i knew you then, even now
Yes Mein Furher, I

mean...mister president.
Inspector Clouseau is
so long gone and missed
Haiku #56175, by vhs of is google trying to write it's own novels????
March 6, 2017 1:11 pm ET

Things will be okay
Humans are remarkable
Problems can be solved
Haiku #56174, by Anonymous Poet
March 6, 2017 1:05 am ET

If earth is flooded,
I hope all mosquitoes drown.
We'll be like Venus.

Hot, sweaty, acrid.
Worst venereal disease:
Global warming clap.
Haiku #56173, by df of eurener calle
March 6, 2017 12:30 am ET

I'm going outside.
Standing on my head naked.
See my asshole, God!

Fuck, I hate the rain.
Climate change and for the worse.
My asshole is clean.
Haiku #56172, by df of acacia breca
March 6, 2017 12:25 am ET

The Japs understand.
That's why they have coffee shops.
But not for coffee.

Young girls, short dresses,
mirrored floors, see-thru panties.
Can I get more cream?
Haiku #56171, by df of farmacia menu
March 6, 2017 12:21 am ET

We need comedy.
The laughter as nukes go off.
Smile so brightly.
Haiku #56170, by df of calle stop
March 6, 2017 12:17 am ET

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Haiku #56169, by iurtpoio of USA
March 5, 2017 6:47 pm ET

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Haiku #56168, by iurtpoio of USA
March 5, 2017 6:18 pm ET

Well, Origami.
I'd rather have salami.
It's the paper cuts.
Haiku #56167, by Toxidyne of CA
March 5, 2017 5:09 pm ET

the end of time will
begin shortly after miss
lady gaga does

a gig with the band
megadeth, metallica was
the 6th seal broken
Haiku #56166, by vhs
March 5, 2017 2:32 pm ET

and the jokes go on
did you hear the one about
the wiretap? well

of course you did if
you were listening in on
xyz affairs
Haiku #56165, by vhs
March 5, 2017 2:11 pm ET

Full body massage.
Held in a fart the whole time.
Ideal gas law.
Haiku #56164, by df of PV=nRT
March 5, 2017 7:57 am ET

The words of Jesus
written on a bathroom wall.
Save your soul and shit.

I red my captcha.
No kidding: "Graveyard to let".
Now that's irony.
Haiku #56163, by df
March 5, 2017 2:57 am ET

politics by all
other names is war by means
other than violence
Haiku #56162, by vhs of Commandant Heineken
March 4, 2017 6:16 pm ET

it becomes one man's
joke and the rest have moved on
novelty wears off
Haiku #56161, by vhs
March 4, 2017 6:09 pm ET

Catsuit VonPooper
Meows below my window
Fresh air is priceless
Haiku #56160, by Mandingo Ebola of Roxy Mountain High
March 4, 2017 3:22 am ET

Taint misbehaving
Scripture sexy scent saving
Should have stopped sooner
Haiku #56159, by Mandingo Ebola
March 4, 2017 1:56 am ET

That just blew my mind
I think I just blew myself
Justice sniff my taint
Haiku #56158, by Mandingo Ebola of Holiday inn off I 70
March 4, 2017 1:49 am ET

To keep from cumming
when I am fucking my wife,
I think of my wife.
Haiku #56157, by df
March 4, 2017 12:40 am ET

grumpy old redneck
said mother nature made bodies
to last 30 years

he also said use
it or lose it, but some guys
can drink forever

smoke, move heavy things
and die like Lemmy did at
70 or something
Haiku #56156, by vhs
March 3, 2017 1:11 pm ET

Screw the tissue test
Just a trick to sell toothpaste
With bad addatives
Haiku #56155, by Anonymous Poet
March 2, 2017 7:31 pm ET

Hello!
Haiku #56154, by rwrupoyr of USA
March 2, 2017 11:20 am ET

Australian spam
Made with kangaroo butt meat
Still tastes just like poop
Haiku #56153, by Adorable Kittens
March 2, 2017 8:51 am ET

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Haiku #56152, by niceneat of australia
March 2, 2017 3:48 am ET

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Haiku #56151, by Peterdus of Nepal
March 1, 2017 8:45 pm ET

hmm now why does the
body begin to fuck up
when history needs

old farts that can tell
the right people to go to their
rooms without supper
Haiku #56150, by vhs
March 1, 2017 1:05 pm ET

http://linkbun.ch/04o1y
Haiku #56149, by jimmy charles of Houston
March 1, 2017 3:00 am ET

There's nothing to say.
Listen to me anyway.
Pa-root toot-toot. Ahhhhh!
Haiku #56148, by df
February 28, 2017 10:34 pm ET

Psycho chicks are cool.
They sure know how to suck dick.
Thank God for Satan!
Haiku #56147, by df
February 28, 2017 10:31 pm ET