Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
29 Years, 266 Days and 78342 Haiku later...
Horrible poetry for the digital age
29 Years, 266 Days and 78342 Haiku later...
she hungry, grab tool
mammoth hunt happen tonight
grandma has found rock
mammoth hunt happen tonight
grandma has found rock
by of about 315,000 years ago
"Look, right over there!"
she points towards the water
grandma found the loch
she points towards the water
grandma found the loch
by of Scottish Highlands
I am in Brooklyn.
I said BROOKLYN, you hear me?
And I'm spending cash.
I said BROOKLYN, you hear me?
And I'm spending cash.
by of gentrified neighborhood
well, that's a haiku
to wake up too this morning.
g'day to you too?
to wake up too this morning.
g'day to you too?
by of the robot factory(?)
I type this haiku.
I put in front of your brain.
You read and react.
I put in front of your brain.
You read and react.
by of Skinnerian Behavioralism
Danielle is a bot.
Danielle is as fake as f---k.
No human says that.
Danielle is as fake as f---k.
No human says that.
by
She feeds her green pet.
The creature loves to eat flesh.
Grandma has a croc.
The creature loves to eat flesh.
Grandma has a croc.
by of Alligator App
She simmers the meat.
She keeps it in there all day.
Grandma has a crock.
She keeps it in there all day.
Grandma has a crock.
by of Slow Cookin' Granny
she can't remember
perhaps it's ptsd
grandma has a block
perhaps it's ptsd
grandma has a block
by of no gettin' over it
"Gapped your friends' civic,
the blower makes it run 9s."
Grandma's car ain't stock.
the blower makes it run 9s."
Grandma's car ain't stock.
by of the nursing home drag strip
/gamemode creative
slash give @target item count
grandma has bedrock
slash give @target item count
grandma has bedrock
by of overworld dimension
fast food poisoning
inside of a plastic tray
gas station sushi
inside of a plastic tray
gas station sushi
by of the servo refrigeration
You don't want to hear
these words regarding sushi:
"Well it's fresh enough..."
these words regarding sushi:
"Well it's fresh enough..."
by of Fish I Found in the Freezer
A single yearning
I have for fancy raw fish
Give me my sushi
I have for fancy raw fish
Give me my sushi
by of The dumpster behind the Chinese buffet
Reflecting pool closed
Just like the Strait of Hormuz
Well done my comrades
Just like the Strait of Hormuz
Well done my comrades
by of Stalingrad
speaking of old, guess
who can legally drink now?
yuh huh, itsa me
who can legally drink now?
yuh huh, itsa me
by of ate een
we are the future
although i'm now pretty old
and getting past it
although i'm now pretty old
and getting past it
by of born in the fifties
looking at post date
it's weird being fourteen hours
ahead, time travel
it's weird being fourteen hours
ahead, time travel
by of Australia
speed of light approach
gravity time dilation
grandma has a clock
gravity time dilation
grandma has a clock
by of bored in school
he hucks hokkus at
the haiku horde, hear he hucks
the haikus he holds
so if he hucks his
haiku hoard, his haiku horde
is hence half as bored
the haiku horde, hear he hucks
the haikus he holds
so if he hucks his
haiku hoard, his haiku horde
is hence half as bored
by of the seashore
Love geometry:
Project volumes onto planes.
Ha, flat mosquito.
Project volumes onto planes.
Ha, flat mosquito.
by of nighttime insect hunting
inaccuracy
a secret superpower
more than a hundred
a secret superpower
more than a hundred
by of my days are numbered... wrongly
I will whoop your ass
Much better than your first time
By my haiku verse
Much better than your first time
By my haiku verse
by of Fig Darthpucker
I am burning for
A love similar to my
First rough ass whooping
A love similar to my
First rough ass whooping
by of The back seat of the lifted Dodge Ram of my mind
Big and bountiful
Sun burned butt cheeks of Satan
Please swallow me whole
Sun burned butt cheeks of Satan
Please swallow me whole
by of The old holler in Spank Bank West Virginia
a site with no ads
this is some kind of madness
the very best sort
this is some kind of madness
the very best sort
by of what a savings
Shokuichi-yo.
We drink the Asahi dry.
We dance Shibuya.
We drink the Asahi dry.
We dance Shibuya.
by of Nippon
counting down the days
there's less than a hundred left
till thirty years here
there's less than a hundred left
till thirty years here
by of internet relic celebrations
Oh lawdy mama
C'mon now baybeh whoa YEAH!
(shriek/shriek/shriek) allRIGHT!!
C'mon now baybeh whoa YEAH!
(shriek/shriek/shriek) allRIGHT!!
by of Midwest Assisted Living Facility
In proximity;
Love your anonymity:
Pure sublimity.
Love your anonymity:
Pure sublimity.
by of 2028 A.D.
Haiku me this y'all:
The notes of a dying fall
Are they a last call?
The notes of a dying fall
Are they a last call?
by of True Crimin'
I want the heaven
Of heterosexuals.
(Not the queer heaven)
Of heterosexuals.
(Not the queer heaven)
by of Abadan, Greater Persia
random gibberish
anonymous user posts
once every two days
anonymous user posts
once every two days
by of anonymous Australia
rub me the wrong way
smearing my contribution
and i'll press delete
smearing my contribution
and i'll press delete
by of editorial malice
instruments of love
my man meat maracas
beat rhythmically
my man meat maracas
beat rhythmically
by of salsa blue balls
It's beer therapy.
And it's time for my session.
Liquid counseling.
And it's time for my session.
Liquid counseling.
by of Malta
big beautiful war
there will be peace in our time
intermittently
there will be peace in our time
intermittently
by of adjust your clocks, and expectations
"See my mouse tattoo?"
I know how this one ends, nan
Grandma has been blocked.
I know how this one ends, nan
Grandma has been blocked.
by of hungry cats
it's a silly trope
but don't shoot the messenger
grandma has a glock
but don't shoot the messenger
grandma has a glock
by of easily triggered
Odd, their Odyssey...
Weird revisionist role-play;
Nilotic Helen...
Weird revisionist role-play;
Nilotic Helen...
by of Kisumu
Slow-cooking the stew,
Simmering all the day long,
Grandma has a crock.
Simmering all the day long,
Grandma has a crock.
by of Crock-out
sometimes the secret
doesn't lie in semantics
but in gymnastics
doesn't lie in semantics
but in gymnastics
by of definitionitely
immorality
filmic immortality
granma has themroc
filmic immortality
granma has themroc
by of cinéma avant-garde
Cock-a-doodle-DOOOO !
It's sunrise in the barnyard.
Grandma has a flock.
It's sunrise in the barnyard.
Grandma has a flock.
by of Brewster
Just to hold her stuff
When she's playing contact sports,
Grandma has a jock.
When she's playing contact sports,
Grandma has a jock.
by of Loaded for Game
Pulls up in her boat,
Ties it up and heads ashore:
Grandma has a dock.
Ties it up and heads ashore:
Grandma has a dock.
by of Floating