did not have right gear
needed longer static ropes
but my anchor held

yeah! love that album
undeservedly obscure
gets zero airplay

yeah! love that album
undeservedly obscure
gets zero airplay

Listen: Bridge of Sighs
will reveal knowledge to you.
Please listen to it.

I am so fucked-up
that I need to interact
with lost souls right here.

I love nobody,
except those who post haiku
here at the crossroads...

so when i lose my
temper, lost my glasses when
do i find myself?

Bad troll! Bad! No no!
No internet porn today!
Now say you're sorry!

Should I f*** squirrels?
Animal experts say no.
I do anyway.

Left over stuffing.
Turkey broth with fat skimmed off.
My God, it's heaven!

Should I feed squirrels?
Animal experts say no.
I do anyway.

What's on "smart TV"?
Grey's Anatomy drama.
Bizarre use of "smart".

Keurig coffee cunts.
Modern abominations.
Horrible flavor.

In my next life I'll
dumpster dive all of my food
and live underground.

My biggest pet peeve.
Americans wasting food.
Kick them in the balls.

Don't trust the reindeer.
Most of them have Nazi names.
They won't bring Jews toys.

Biscuits and gravy?
Or high fiber cereal?
I guess I should poo.

Wanted to get high.
Went to the dispensary.
There was just a monk.

He dispensed wisdom.
But it was none I could use.
Asked for a refund.

He gave me a nun.
It was a nun I could use.
And she got me high.

Eat a hug dinner
and get drunk on Christmas Eve.
Puke in grandma's vase.

Not Venezuela!
That's where the old Nazis live!
They're responsible!

They are doing this!
All this spam's a Nazi plot!
It's not the commies!

So... i will break protocol.

vhs... if you are having chest pains, please see a doc. And try to eat right.

Is it possible
that you could really be me
and I not know it?

I'll identify
as the last living sane man.
*Laughs like a madman.*

Since it's wrong to laugh
at most of the world these days,
the world has gone mad.

A truly mad man
Can never laugh at himself.
That's the litmus test.

Here we go and this
Is the Philip kindred
Dick world he dreamed up

An awesome webpage.
Russian_girls_eat_ass_dot_com
Am I right, or what?

A fake world made by
A fake guy who is autistic
Seeming like person..

A fake world made by
A fake guy who is autistic
Seeming like person..

You seriously
think I'll murder anyone?
I just see "Meta"....

It's fucking awful.
Our future is in VR?!?!
Makes me want to puke.

Vhs.... you're right.
I am a sociopath.
You can still like me.

Please don't stop posting.
I'll try to buffer my angst.
This world just... you know.

How fitting for this
Sharing on line shitting up
A good idea, bad

Maybe I'll die from
The chest pains I have me think
It's just pulled muscle

I take shit to heart.
Personal... I'm not
A sociopath

Like I think you are
Df... I wanted to like
You but maybe I'll

Just stop posting.

I had two guys ride
My ass in a pick up...they were
Trolling, I though they

Drove like they wanted
To hit me, now I don't see
What the game was but

You've ruined this site
For me, you I don't know what
To do with unhinged

Trolls or whatever
Even though we could argue
That's what I'm doing.

Dude, you're pissing me
Off, maybe I just need to ignore
The psychopath that

Posts here but fuck off
Fuck you, fuck your fantasies
Fuck your sociopathy

Fuck your unhinged threats
Against strangers, good friends live
There, get a life or

Get lost and fuck off

I'll not stop writing
"DTZ" until he's dead.
Nuclear mishap?

I feel like a slug.
Ate way too much damn turkey.
Got me all plugged up.

Here I sit, broken-
hearted, tried to write haiku,
but someone didn't replace the toilet paper.

Time machine wanted.
I'll kill Zuckerberg's parents
before they conceive.

Maybe Bezos too.
They caused corona virus.
Therefore they should die.

If you send spam sites,
at least make sure its good porn.
Dolphins bang fat chick.

And I can't read it.
At least translate your damn ads.
Lazy pig commies.

I can suggest you
Many website to visit
From dull Chinese bots.

You should not be here.
This website's not for children.
Leave or we'll spank you.

Watch my nude haiku.
PornHub poetry readings.
Includes flatulence.

Dearest Santa Claus
What I would like for Christmas
Figbit haiku watch

I farted so loud
it woke the people nextdoor;
the called the police.

The police said I
can kill Zuckerberg because
nobody likes him.

Dearest Santa Claus,
What I would like for Christmas
is Zuckerberg dead.

While we are at it,
we can also bomb "Meta".
Take down their servers!

That would be the best
Christmas gift I ever got.
Doesn't matter how.

But if Zuckerberg
were eaten alive by pigs,
that would be awesome!

Jesus blah blah blah.
Everyone hates Christmas songs.
Now the next topic.

Murdering the douche.
Yes, of course, Mark Zuckerberg.
Dark web sniper gear.

It needs to be done.
Free the world of his zombies.
Virtually dead.

Why didn't Jesus
walk on a bunch of hot coals?
That would be something.

I'll never forget
waking up Christmas morning
and finding him there
all covered with soot
I think he pissed himself, too.
Jesus in fireplace.

It isn't murder.
Zuckerberg isn't human.
Zombie cyborg creep.