How long does it take
For the clean up procedure
using a bidet?
by Andy McShathere of Waiting
According to you
I've offended all the gods
with my poetry
by Bad Haiku Poet of Weeping under Old Willow
Fortuitous fart
From across a crowded room
You followed the scent
by Passwinder Patil of Currying your favour
God does not love you.
The world sees the things you've done.
You will burn in hell.
by And I will be there reading my poems at you. of Much worse than burning, yeah?
I don't speak Russian.
Nor do I sell porn novels.
Go ask your mother.
by Darth Whorendous
Penis-shaped package.
And cash on delivery.
You call that discrete?!
by Like I will accept it! of Next time get my name right.
Haiku poetry
Delivered fresh to your door
Discreet packaging
by Old Willow Enterprises of 17 Syllable Way, just past the Old Willow exit
I think Darth's the bot
by Anonymous Poet
Dark, yellow urine
You thought it was lemonade
Asked for a refill
by Entrepeeneur of Rest Area
Hey, cut/paste text-bot:
Captcha my package, dimwit.
(Dull algorithm)
by Unplug the Bots of Live-birth Mammalian
I'll use your bidet
Do you ride it like horse?
'Cause I've got the trots
by Trifecta of Washroom Flushing Downs
Jumping roof to roof
Clearing obstacles with ease
Familiar Horseface
by Sarah Jessica Parkour
God! He sneezed on me.
Emotional tragedy!
I think I will sue!
by Oy vay, I need a Jewish lawyer.
No, i don't want your boilded bananas nor your rainbow feather dusters. Get out of the street.
by Priveldged rich asshole
Like veggie burgers,
haiku that don't mention poop...
What the hell's the point?!
by Call them highpoo
Wish you could see it.
Public restrooms with bidets.
Civilization!
by Squeeky clean!
He lost his dandy,
Yankee Doodle messed his drawers.
Donald Trump rejoiced.
by No, not his dresser drawers.
He lost his dandy,
Yankee Doodle messed his drawers.
Donald Trump rejoiced.
by No, not his dresser drawers.
But seriously
Sometimes there are poems here
that don't mention poop
by This is not one of them
Gina Carano
can use you for a butt plug.
Fart you into space.
by Who needs Space X???
Then move to Asia.
Hire Flippos to wipe you.
Thirteen bucks a day.
by They can feed you too. of But I dont know if airlines take 600 lb people.
No, that's unicorns
Like a horse but with a horn
(Whinnied from next stall)
by It floats, made of Oats
Six hundred pound life.
Phenomenal manure pile!
But, can't reach to wipe
by Tosser of Bog roll
I thought transformers
can use the women's bathroom.
Rainbow colored poo.
by Poo and stool. Add those to the list. of Https://https.com
It's not so dusty.
Don't believe me? Ask the Pope.
But he always lies.
by The silly cathies. 99.9 % hypocrites. of Especially in poor places. Just a joke.
He shat with such force
He turned himself inside out
And wiped his nose clean
by Transformers of Washroom
Fiber One
It will flush you out.
So that you can flush it down.
Good for colon health.
by General Mills sales rep.
Mother Teresa
washing out her dusty snatch
Ever had that dream?
by Dreamer of Dreams
How many bran flakes
does it take to make you poop?
Ate one too many
by Cereal Killer of of Underwear
Plant pornography
Turning over a new leaf
Turning on the hose
by Editor in Chief of Better Hoes and Gardens
It hasn't stopped yet.
This toilet's overflowing.
Pressurized sewage.
by Turd explosion.
The bot stopped posting
It's a haiku miracle
God Bless Bad Haiku
by Thankful of Old Willow Mental Hospital
I'll stay here on earth.
Zero g pooping's a mess.
And hard to squeeze out.
by And my sphincter might get sucked oit the vacuum flusher.
That's no octopus.
It's a ladyboy hooker.
With eight rubber dongs.
by One for each hole. of Japanese businessmen flock here for that shit.
Rainbow Octopus
Spotted off Philippines coast
Did you see it, Darth?
by LGBTQ Cephalopod of My pronouns are Mush head and Grabby
Up in outer space
There's a plugged up alien
straining on the john
by Anita Klenz of Outskirts of Uranus
Said the magic words
The bots have been defeated
Long live Bad Haiku
by Cheering of Crowd
Said the magic words
The bots have been defeated
Long live Bad Haiku
by Cheering of Crowd
I think it's my ex.
She's a whore and hates haiku.
And looks like a pig.
by So she is writing this garbage! of It must be!
I think it's my ex.
She's a whore and hates haiku.
And looks like a pig.
by So she is writing this garbage! of It must be!
Who is programming
The anti-haiku sex-bots
to take down this site?
by They Are Afraid of Bad Haiku !
No bots in heaven.
No pornographers either.
And no bad haiku.
by You MUST believe in the blood of Christ to be saved
I have to admit
I was so proud of myself
when you liked this one
This grizzly bear scat
has beautiful red berries
Christmas centerpiece
Haiku #68508, by Interior Defecator of Alaska
October 27, 2020 2:01 am ET
by SK
Well, I hope someone's making money off this b/c to think this is just done for the sake of someone being an asshole is almost as vile as my haiku.
Let's take the time to reflect, go back to the first 200 bad haiku posted here, what's your favorite worst haiku or even non-haiku? Hmmmmm?????
by Ye Olden Pucker of Figs of Yore
Haiku Titanic
Making room for Figpucker
Hop on this ice chunk
by SK of No,you can't bring your cheese collection
It's like being chained
in a Philippine shitehouse
hole in wet season.
Help me Iamback
Kenobi, you're my only
hope... or maybe not.
by Poopie pants pout.
Hokusai-san's wave
must have protected this site
from waves of trash-text.
by Golden Age of Bad Haiku
Yes, you were pregnant
But not with haiku poems
Get with the program
by Noticer
Jesus... we're all doomed.
And, you know, thank God for that.
We are so useless.
by Humanity is a parasite.
Why does your butt sag?
From carrying extra weight
of your endowment?
by Concerned
