Masturbatory.
It sums up my life story.
Invest in Fleshlight.

Who threw up their lunch?
Does it splatter on his joint?
Please... don't wear make-up.

Buttered toast
Between my large thighs
Orgasmic

Who threw the first punch?
Does it matter at this point?
Please...kiss and make up.

I must disagree.
"Bad Haiku: (necessary)".
Somehow I doubt that.

*sleeping on sidewalks.
Shit, I cannot fucking type.
New keyboards don't help.

Run-over dead rats.
Children sleeping sidewalks.
And I want a beer.

So many topics.
But this is not about that.
This is about this.

It's time for more farts.
Always back to the basics.
What poems are for.

Farts are for poems.
Loud or sneaky, we love them.
Poems are for farts.

Sunsets and puppies.
Puppies launched from a cannon.
Watch how the sharks feed.

Grandma has a cock
It is a very rude bird
Shits on the sidewalk

You must have either
a tiny little man fist
or a huge dildo

My fist is
A good substitute
For dildo

I have penises.
Mine and all those in my butt.
Assuming those count.

I wrote a haiku.
It was really pretty good.
But I forgot it.

You got penises?
Yeah? Well, so does your sister.
Won't share them with me.

Your wife just did that.
She sucked my juicy pimple.
Oh, that was my dick.

My zits are larger.
And my penises oozes pus.
My zits squirt sperm cells.

Your pimple
Is very juicy
Suck it dry

I hate mosquitoes.
It's a sewage injection
with every bite.

Subcutaneous
cesspool infection pus sore
popped in McDonald's.

It's a rare honor.
The one US citizen
kicked out for grossness.

Maybe went too far
when I compared the pus to
their nasty mayonnaise.

But I do not care.
It made the fries taste better.
Fucking mosquitoes.

gross is as gross does
more than a fair share is here
elevate discourse

You write of poo much
Try some new territory
Urine, or oozing sores?

Try out this fun thing.
Put it on your bucket list.
Go poop in Asia.

You'll get no TP.
Only a water ladle.
And you need strong legs.

Don't get your pants wet.
You must keep them off the floor.
And roll up your shirt.

this is my planet.
indeed, it's my universe.
you should be leaving.

why are you afraid?
delete my haiku and prove
that they control you

Je m'adresse

this is thanksgiving
speaking the truth without fear
this home of the brave

what do you stand for?
falling leaves and setting sun
need right words, brave deeds

Are these refugees?
Or truly, are they settlers?
Who don't accept us

There is always hope
but They are intolerant
They need change, not us

It has been written
In the Quran you read it
"State and Religion"

This is not a faith
It's a system of control
An Islamic State

Islam is not good
Submission is what they want
For all to submit

been a long long while
and happy to see this site
still exists, i smile

been a long long while
and happy to see this site
still exists, i smile

yes, I call you out
protocol violation
counting important

Drunken monkey pants
Acting like you are not here
Assemble the leaches

Don't have anything
Nothing much for us to do
Maybe masturbate

Do you shame yourself?
You need professional help.
Consult my lobster.

Thanks to the guy
Who wrote that fucking shit spam
My point is proven

Fuck the goddamn world
People are just so shitty
A world full of fucks

not for one minute
should you give in and believe
this shit can't be fixed

Will you follow us?
We're going over the wall
To lands yet unknown

What What In The Butt.
It's so gay, but so catchy.
Catchy just like AIDS.

Surrounded by whores.
They love their crappy music.
Blistered vaginas.

a thousand assholes
can spoil an entire planet
the world is not fair

Fucking die, spammers.
It has all been said before.
Hope you die of AIDS.

Yes, I know that, Ash.
But it's fun to hate people.
Goddamn Eskimos!

seems you miss the point
muslims are not the problem
daesh need culling

Paris will soon mend.
Public guillotine Muslims.
I mean all of them.

is paris burning ?
how can this fix anything ?
this world is fucked up