these postings prove that
pharmaceuticals in our
drinking water and

pesticides toxic
wastes and Jesus are the one
way ticket to Hell

end of days mayan
calendar apocryphal
rapture th...th...that's
.............................all folks!!!

The earth moves under
you gotta say it's over
let go of my feet

feel the disturbance
in the force..notice haiku
pace is quickening

all signs pointing to
End of Daze for the aimless
wandering souls here

fair weather runner
the lion of winter slows
to brisk frigid walks

more interactive
sociopathic brainstorms
ping pong for ding dongs

on continuum
of lunacy where falls this
sanatorium

for haiku misfits
throw out diagnostic terms...
devil's dominion

joggers in winter
mostly are slight and slender-
exercising care.

not even theater
sociopathic brainstorm
for freaks and losers

if theater why not
website of the absurd it's
no big stretch to make

website of the absurd
haiku tragicomedy
pinging 45664 acts.

the haiku pontiff
waves to his adoring crowd
long live Sir William

Sir Will the anchor
the beacon of light guiding
wayward travelers

decade's worth of drivel
Sir William waits for Godot
on high lofty perch

People come and go
Ten years I've posted on here
I can wait! OK.

gently falls the snow
covering a few unknowns
passing bye and bye.

you suck

names rudely wrested
but all's fair in ruthless Wild
West haiku venue

as cited earlier
you'll find 49 Ray's Pizzas in
NYC fakirs abound

I love me! who do you love?

I'm right. Know I am
More intelligent than you
Need to be worshiped

It's late Sunday night
Weekend is nearly over
Back to work Monday

Lucille Balled Desi
begot son Ricky and a
nine year TV run

nature's fickle ways
sun's warmth melts snow to patches
tonight frigid blasts

eyes close when sneezing
toes curl with deep orgasms
shit pants when sleeping

only three stanzas
that time, you disappoint me
go for ten to twelve

lost and late a priest
gives graveside eulogy for deceased homeless man

upon last "Amen" priest
asks where the family was
work crew responds thus..

we don't rightly know
but we're here putting in
this new septic tank

...thus a septic funeral

amidst the ton of
self-aggrandizing flotsam
in Haiku River

I pine for the "pure"
rape incest misogyny
rants of septic man

time to punch the clock
at the loser-mill again
get to work bs

haiku Freaks would make
Tod Browning proud here at the
freakazoid circus

this jackal breeding
ground of semi-literate
vainglorious dolts

running amok in
myriad masquerades without
a sense of real self

just men behind the
Oz curtain belching fiery
but impotent threats

Why should I end it?
I think I will continue
To use other names

The light streaming in
My cave lights with mossy green
Who looks for me here?

Easy to wind up
You lot are so gullible
What to do next???

Dam It's all over
I have to use my real name
William Nippress

Ok I admit
those having a go at me
Were written by me

I use different names
It's all a game and your "IT"
Last laugh is on you!!!

Sir William is "IT"
Now has to tag another
And on it goes.

Voted Badhaiku's most written about.

For the most mentions
It looks like I win again
Must stop entering

Hahahaha I love it!

tis the time of year
for new year resolutions.
mine? write bad haiku.

goddess Nemesis
dealt Narcissus a death blow...
love his reflection

life was jut simpler
when zapooper ranted on
'bout gay Star Wars sex

sorry for the break
in form...prove me wrong..or duel
haikus to the death

Little William in a bright new sash
fell in the fire and burnt to ash
now even though the room grows chilly
I haven't the heart to poke poor Willie

he ate the Cuervo
worm "con gusto" and lusted
for his lovers' sheathed

and now I know why
zapooper lives to hurl Star
War gay invectives.....

and why he does so without the 5-7-5 form.

Were you telling me?
In this bad haiku format
I shouldn't do it???

But it's ok for you??? Twat!!

yawn! you're so clever
well dam me boring critique
never thought of that!

why does soil smell like
fish on a farm, or shit, yet
lovely things spring up?

come to think of it
was it a five minute argument, or did...

did I forget to
pay, no, you did not, did did!
but an argument

is a series of...
how absurd, now I see
how I have been all

this time...like that skit...

souza's march lives on
in sacred memory of
the Monty Python players

a Cleese/Idle ditty
Oxford-Cambride debate done
in haiku format

orators beware
break the form...automatic
disqualification**

** -oops I just disqualified myself [6 syllables]