Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
28 Years, 38 Days and 77431 Haiku later...

how long can i last
in full blown sobriety
oh god, give me strength
Haiku # 30209, May 7, 2003 1:29 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
a shameless voyuer
pressing my ears to the wall
the sound of bed springs
Haiku # 30208, May 7, 2003 1:20 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
a crass offender
writing in tautologies
that last poem sucked ass
Haiku # 30207, May 7, 2003 1:14 pm ET
by sexually frustrated (mr. redundant)
falling down the stairs
unable to break his fall
a wizened old man
Haiku # 30206, May 7, 2003 1:09 pm ET
by sexually frustrated (the comic injustice of the elderly)
i can't feel too blue
when i'm here, where i belong
my hand in granny
Haiku # 30205, May 7, 2003 11:48 am ET
by Drophammer
trembling sphincter
moist, dripping, stretched gaping wide
now just hold it there
Haiku # 30204, May 7, 2003 11:44 am ET
by Drophammer
Where is the ex go?
Off to hose other guys with money.
What whores often go for.
Haiku # 30203, May 7, 2003 11:07 am ET
by Steve Reents of Illinois
"Can I play with it?"
"Why, most certainly." "Not that,
"I mean your moustache."
Haiku # 30202, May 7, 2003 9:46 am ET
by A Student of I don't have a moustache but if I did that would happen
A big, pink device
Huge pulsating mothership
Please take me with you
Haiku # 30201, May 7, 2003 9:43 am ET
by A Student of Und den nette Mann nimmt die Frau aus
.........the azure ocean
so calm with shimmering waves
.......gives me a sunburn
Haiku # 30200, May 7, 2003 9:08 am ET
by ronin of shootimreallylosingmytouch
.......sorry there, old poo(p)
..it's what not you think I am (?)
....i have returned, yes (sigh*)

(i keep using the yes to complete
...............the 5-7-5)
Haiku # 30199, May 7, 2003 9:03 am ET
by ronin of comiccombustionyourassbigmouth
yes, indeed, redneck
you can do us a favor
by dropping like dead
Haiku # 30198, May 7, 2003 8:58 am ET
by ronin of andmakeitfastplease
Comic combustion
Is it bird, is it a plane
No its super ASH
Haiku # 30197, May 7, 2003 8:58 am ET
by William Nippress
.......i like the texture
and the shades of ocres and
....tans and yellows. too
Haiku # 30196, May 7, 2003 8:55 am ET
by ronin
....a fucking redneck
romping silly in the field
...makes a good target
Haiku # 30195, May 7, 2003 8:52 am ET
by ronin
......moments of frailties,
frozen in time, make good so-
.........lid evidence, sir

(shoot, i gotta brush up on my
..............badhaiku)
Haiku # 30194, May 7, 2003 8:50 am ET
by ronin
...such unfaithfullness
and times of indiscretion
...do become you, yes

Haiku # 30193, May 7, 2003 8:44 am ET
by ronin of farfarawayfrommoxandAnonymousPrick
i'm quiet obsessive
outlaw countless perfidies
haiku has a cock
Haiku # 30192, May 7, 2003 8:16 am ET
by ash
Sun too bright to stand
Beating down relentlessly
Need factor thirty
Haiku # 30191, May 7, 2003 7:58 am ET
by William Nippress
If only you think
you
Haiku # 30190, May 7, 2003 3:04 am ET
by William Nippress
Shotgun, Shotgun fun
Im gona shoot deer in side
Shotgun, Shotgun fun
Im gona cut off its head
Wont stop huntin til im dead!
Haiku # 30189, May 6, 2003 8:53 pm ET
by Redneckyota
Ich bin der Bauherr von Babel, ein Trappenhaus zu Holle
Er ersetzt eure
Haiku # 30188, May 6, 2003 6:37 pm ET
by A Student of Oh dear, I have no idea what that coursework was supposed to be
oh the poor haiku
what are these people doing?
five, seven, then five!
Haiku # 30187, May 6, 2003 4:22 pm ET
by tiger of vegas
It drops down on you
It rains down upon your heads
I pee off the roof
Haiku # 30186, May 6, 2003 4:20 pm ET
by u2popmofo
tourists everywhere
marvelling at the skyline
smiling like monkeys
Haiku # 30185, May 6, 2003 2:59 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
no beer before noon
a brand new experience
pure lucidity
Haiku # 30184, May 6, 2003 2:28 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
corporate sell-out
written all over his face
stamped like a bar code
Haiku # 30183, May 6, 2003 2:00 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
if i understood
that would surely be funny
but i don't get it
Haiku # 30182, May 6, 2003 1:52 pm ET
by sexually frustrated (what nonsensical forgeries, not even close)
birds do what they do
with no justification
we should watch and learn
Haiku # 30181, May 6, 2003 1:49 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
if it werent for nachos,
i would have shot myself a long
time ago..DALE EARNHARRRDT!
Haiku # 30180, May 6, 2003 1:49 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
spread out the pieces
examine them one by one
they still make no sense
Haiku # 30179, May 6, 2003 1:47 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
in office hours
he expects me to brown nose
not gonna happen
Haiku # 30178, May 6, 2003 1:36 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
i could do their job
better than they ever could
they hate me for it
Haiku # 30177, May 6, 2003 1:29 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
the problem with school
they don't even challenge me
tenure-track failures
Haiku # 30176, May 6, 2003 1:28 pm ET
by sexually frustrated (school's a business, they make money off of passing you through the system like a turd, but education it ai
i'm a neurotic
dissecting like a surgeon
actions of the past
Haiku # 30175, May 6, 2003 1:18 pm ET
by sexually frustrated (inspired by ash)
the lovely rain song
i'd suck jimmy page's dick
even though i'm straight
Haiku # 30174, May 6, 2003 1:08 pm ET
by sexually frustrated (that's how much i love him)
a stool for the gods
too perfect to flush away
i'll wrap it in foil
Haiku # 30173, May 6, 2003 1:05 pm ET
by sexually frustrated (that's more like it)
those last four weren't mine
i'm never up that early
they don't have my style
Haiku # 30172, May 6, 2003 1:03 pm ET
by sexually frustrated (the inimitable)
Ich bin der Sturmbringer und der Tr
Haiku # 30171, May 6, 2003 11:36 am ET
by A Student of Hallo Lehrer. Leid, aber, ich habe mit Ihre Tochter geschlafen
Bulbs, palatte of color,
tearing my back a hole of fear
Wings disolve, dirt plant
Haiku # 30170, May 6, 2003 10:07 am ET
by Steve Reents of Illinois
You and me
gotta go pee
where is Chee?
chilli peppers basist, flea
hug a tree
kill a bee
Haiku # 30169, May 6, 2003 10:04 am ET
by gordon sumner of shawshank
I am cold
grandma is old
i feel bold
where in the world
where is aunt pearl?
how is my girl?
go on and twirl
Haiku # 30168, May 6, 2003 10:03 am ET
by frankie of shawshank
Cooked on the grill
then felt ill
then took a pill
cant pay my bill
thats a chill
where is will?
Haiku # 30167, May 6, 2003 10:02 am ET
by Anonymous Poet of shawshank
Takin' a pill
'Cause I am ill
Met a guy named Will
Payin' my bill
Drinkin' some swill
Gotta go kill
Take a chill
Haiku # 30166, May 6, 2003 10:01 am ET
by marvin the poet of shawshank
frustrated, can't you
at least try - express yourself
in haiku format?
Haiku # 30165, May 6, 2003 9:43 am ET
by Drophammer of infinite patience
if ever there were
poems to remove from here
frustrated writes them
Haiku # 30164, May 6, 2003 9:42 am ET
by Drophammer of your toaster oven
one thing we all know,
frustrated certainly is
no wonder - no dates
Haiku # 30163, May 6, 2003 9:40 am ET
by Drophammer of your pocket
stinky cheese pussy stink, smell
the stink of clit, pussy juice and oil
all over my face, cunt juice
stinking, bury my face in it
Haiku # 30162, May 6, 2003 8:35 am ET
by sexually frustrated
....OHHHHAAAAARRRGHHHHHHHH
JUST COPPED MY NUT!!!!

HAHAHAHA
Haiku # 30161, May 6, 2003 8:34 am ET
by sexually frustrated
two hot 21 year old girls.....both in nylon pantyhose, short skirts, high heels...one on her knees under the
other, licking her pussy...crotchless
the other moaning...squeezing her
head twixt her legs...the smell of
pussy..ahhhhh...and pantyhose..as
i watch, i grab my cock and stroke
while they continue to suck and
fuck...first straps on a dildo and
proceeds to lift up the others skirt
fucking her hard and long...lesbian
pantyhose stink sex...ahhhhhh...
while i rub my cock with her
nylons....ahhhh...getting ready to
come..... they come over and take
turns sucking my cock...then sit
on my face while the other rubs my
balls...ahhhhh pantyhose sex...
Haiku # 30160, May 6, 2003 8:33 am ET
by sexually frustrated
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