Tree lines fade away
The Great Plains are seen ahead
God this land is dull

I met this one girl
She gave me some body paints
I am now Master

Earrings dangling
Swaying back and forth at night
Sadness fills the air

Hot sex on Sunday
Strawberry cheesecake ice cream
Oooh am I hungry!!!

A koala bear
Hanging from a tree sleeping
Dreams of other lands

what I''d like to see:
a giant german shepard
eating a monkey

your mom looked real good
I said "Hi Mrs. Hot Bitch!"
your dad strangled me

paycheck spent on snacks
afternoons of self abuse
oliver''s a jinx

seven haitian whores
a ninety dollar phone bill
my wife is puzzled

i am perma fryed
I took a tab of acid
Now I''m all strung out

i am perma fryed
I took a tab of acid
Now I''m all strung out

genitalia
are all they can talk about
repetitively

my omnipotence
universally awesome
never self conscious

lameness is the key
it flows freely for a cause
i hate gothic chicks

white make-up dark hair
black crushed velvet dressed to scare
obscure dumb nicknames

i love to be real
find your own reality
and write bad haiku

Beastiality
is fun too. You should all try
fucking a kitten.

Pedophiles are cool.
Don`t knock it `till you try it:
hot sex with children.

Off my chest, at last!
Not embarrassed anymore,
now, I can move on.

My confessions are
not of my own guilt, but of
a bold ignorance.

Youth is all about
being too naive to know
what you will regret.

I saw a kitten
suck another kitten''s dick,
trying to get milk.

I didn`t know the
significance then. At least
he didn''t rape me.

Naked, breastless girl,
playing in the bushes with
her horney cousin.

To the first-grader,
masturbation was never
a sexual thing.

Children frolic in
innocent wonder and give
each other blow jobs.

the rising sun sets
coconuts float west on
the Japanese tide

This hotel room sucks!
I''m stuck in here from the snow!
I''M FREAKING OUT MAN!!!

Sitting in my Room
I come up with this weird shit.
That''s prison for ya!

My dog sleeps a lot
Why, then does he eat so much?
Dreaming is hard work!

This Haiku sucks bad
maybe thats why they call it
Bad Haiku , Dot Com???

I like to watch a
cool cartoon named pokemon
it makes me happy

Maybe Im too Old?
I''m only 69 you know
thats not too old, right??

Though try as i might,
There is no way i can make
Wu-Tang lyrics fit

in another life
i snorted some number two
it made me quite sick

with such shallow minds
they accentuate the crass
in bureaucracy

Left Turn, Yield and Stop
I ignore all of those signs
That''s why I''m in jail

A five dollar bill
Thats How much I''ll pay for your
Precious Psycho Cat

watch out on the can
she hangs out in the bathroom
who? psycho kitty

She acts a little
odd, I love her just the same
my psycho kitty

none of the other
kitties will play with her, my
poor psycho kitty

she''s a little off
and attacks things that aren''t there
dumb psycho kitty

she reall

AHHH! Miss Lewinski
Spokesperson for Jenny Craig?
I''d rather be fat

Dew drops on flowers,
A slight whisper from a child,
Hot sex with a corpse.

I read English Lit.
And yet I can''t tell the diff
Between this and it.

My nipples are sore
From your teeth biting on them
I want to thank you!

Munching sweet clover
Til the bloody dog found him
I miss Good Bunny

Hey you there! Basho!
Easy on plagiarism...
It has its pluses

*i heard a haiku*
do you get off on sneezing?
Ah, innuendo.

greetings m''lady
come inside i won''t bite you
unless you want that

There is something wrong
Still with those apostrophes
Coming up double

Hey there''s nothing wrong
With Kim, Bob, and Pussy Cat
Toking on some ganjj

Hey there''s nothing wrong
With Kim, Bob, and Pussy Cat
Toking on some ganjj

Argh! Those cross-browser
formatting issues always
surprise me. Alas,

my html
was as poorly formatted
as my poetry.