Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
27 Years, 345 Days and 77325 Haiku later...

to all those folks with
out-facing navels, INNIES
TOTALLY KICK ASS!
Haiku # 29159, April 18, 2003 6:37 pm ET
by onjaysun (and you can store Chuck E Cheese tokens)
morrison receives
her affirmative action
Nobel Fiction Prize
Haiku # 29158, April 18, 2003 6:00 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
Jabba Da' Hood
Phelix Da' Phat
tUpAc LiL bRoThEr
Original Wankstah'
ALL TRUE HOMIES AND GANGSTAH
PROPHETS FOR DA NEW MILLENIUM
Haiku # 29157, April 18, 2003 5:57 pm ET
by RICHARD LARSON of SPRINGFIELD, IL
he went to princeton
studied fiction under Oates
became a failure
Haiku # 29156, April 18, 2003 5:55 pm ET
by sexually frustrated with proliferation of the "professor writer"
i not good
me bad, and retawted
me stoopid...and dumb
dats me
Haiku # 29155, April 18, 2003 5:55 pm ET
by sheila newton of round rock tx
WILLIAM NIPPRESS IS GOD!!
WILLIAM NIPPRESS IS GOD!!
WILLIAM NIPPRESS IS A CHUMP!~
Haiku # 29154, April 18, 2003 5:54 pm ET
by Mr. Seed pod of Wassa, Australie
I like to read a book,
Then I like to cook,
My name is Captain Hook,
Come take another look,
My hand you shook,
Whatever you take, you took.
Haiku # 29153, April 18, 2003 5:52 pm ET
by blueballz of sheila, Tx
they denied pynchon
for gravity's rainbow those
narrow minded turds
Haiku # 29152, April 18, 2003 5:51 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
Respeck Da Viet Nam Vet!!
NOT!!
The Viet Cong should be revered
for there awesome torture
techniques. They are god like
cause they tortured the Viet Nam
vet real good-like!
Haiku # 29151, April 18, 2003 5:51 pm ET
by Richard Larson of Springfield, IL
Doobie dabba...zippy zonka,
Jibba jabba..
kerplonk
Haiku # 29150, April 18, 2003 5:49 pm ET
by William Nippress
awful pulitzer
why trust the literary
views of journalists
Haiku # 29149, April 18, 2003 5:49 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
Rape the oranges from the garden,
Steal your face off your lips
....take your mindfold

Haiku # 29148, April 18, 2003 5:49 pm ET
by Jake
I want to be da gweatest poet
of alllll timessssss
dat is me, WILLIAM NIPPRESS
I AM DA MAN...
Haiku # 29147, April 18, 2003 5:47 pm ET
by WILLIAM NIPPRESS of YAAYY MEEEE
Mox in a box
with my sox
have some lox
and..................a bagel
Haiku # 29146, April 18, 2003 5:46 pm ET
by William Nippress
i use haiku form
as practice so i don't take
it seriously
Haiku # 29145, April 18, 2003 4:59 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
hmm, I like to
do lovecraftian beaty
things with some sci fi
and some poems that
are a pissy conservative
bent
Haiku # 29144, April 18, 2003 4:57 pm ET
by Mox of themadtaer@hotmail.com
i'm not a poet
i actually write fiction
haikus are for fun
Haiku # 29143, April 18, 2003 4:55 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
i won't comment on
anyone's haiku talent
it's better that way
Haiku # 29142, April 18, 2003 4:53 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
my philosophy
just write what you want or else
you're just a sell out
Haiku # 29141, April 18, 2003 4:50 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
sometimes on the space
the altar of the Goddess
tact is laid for truth
Haiku # 29140, April 18, 2003 4:49 pm ET
by Mox of leave your burdens at the altar
William is quite good
but I'm not quite an expert
on literature to judge...
Haiku # 29139, April 18, 2003 4:48 pm ET
by Mox
the critical folks
here are good poets but tend
to be rough on the newbies
Haiku # 29138, April 18, 2003 4:48 pm ET
by Mox
so there's a need for
control in the form of flow
and the tao is cheap?
Haiku # 29137, April 18, 2003 4:47 pm ET
by Mox
I've thought of Wicca
but I'm burned out by these
feminists on line
and the cultural divide
and this Jesus keeps coming
back, like a ghost, fog
Haiku # 29136, April 18, 2003 4:46 pm ET
by Mox
I think JRR and JK
were both Catholics, and I
I was at one point
Haiku # 29135, April 18, 2003 4:45 pm ET
by Mox
well, Jack I wished could
meet Tolkien of all people
and what would be wrought?
Haiku # 29134, April 18, 2003 4:44 pm ET
by Mox
well, I'm coming from
a bisexual seeking
time, curious, false
Haiku # 29133, April 18, 2003 4:43 pm ET
by Mox
after Kerouac
the Beats just bore me silly
i liked Dharma Bums
Haiku # 29132, April 18, 2003 4:43 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
i'll reveal nothing
about myself and that's just
the way i like it
Haiku # 29131, April 18, 2003 4:42 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
I'll take it one Beat
at a time, I'm enjoying
what I read, even
if it is dumb and feeding
my delusions, fears
and conservatism
Haiku # 29130, April 18, 2003 4:39 pm ET
by Mox
sf, are you a college student?
pain isn't it?

Lee/Mox
Haiku # 29129, April 18, 2003 4:38 pm ET
by Mox
the writing workshops
sully everything till there's
nothing left but crap
Haiku # 29128, April 18, 2003 4:37 pm ET
by sexually frustrated, but not with Haruki Murakami, Jose Saramago, and J.M. Coetzee--they do their own thing and i respect that
Iowa's writing
workshop must be destroyed on
basic principle
Haiku # 29127, April 18, 2003 4:35 pm ET
by sexually frustrated with Norman Mailer, Toni Morrison, Alice Walker, Steven J. Gould, and fuckers like Les Murray
M.F.A writers
churning out fluff based on the
old dead paradigms
Haiku # 29126, April 18, 2003 4:31 pm ET
by sexually frustrated with other crap writers like Jeanette Winterson, Milan Kundera, Ian McEwan, Martin Amis, Gore Vidal, and Nor
all the form junkies
working at the New Yorker
their fiction's quite bad
Haiku # 29125, April 18, 2003 4:27 pm ET
by sexually frustrated with crap writers like Zadie Smith, Jonathan Franzen, John Updike (extra bad) and Joyce Carol Oates
sometimes tight writing
is the nature of uptight
people who need form
Haiku # 29124, April 18, 2003 4:17 pm ET
by Mox
hmm, often mocking
it's the way things are written
gang tag or mad mag
Haiku # 29123, April 18, 2003 4:17 pm ET
by Mox
sometimes tight writing
must be sacrificed for sake
of full expression
Haiku # 29122, April 18, 2003 4:16 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
each his own, I feel
paranoid about chatting
in weird places, oi
Haiku # 29121, April 18, 2003 4:16 pm ET
by Mox of ...the usual, meds or sins>?
well, Tartuffe aside...
wolves in sheep's clothing or a
bad news bear, you dig
Haiku # 29120, April 18, 2003 4:15 pm ET
by Mox
forgive me oh lord
for my unjust wordiness
i'll economize
Haiku # 29119, April 18, 2003 4:15 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
nice try messiah
those ketchup covered puncture
wounds don't convince me

Haiku # 29118, April 18, 2003 4:06 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
she's got that something
two tits a vagina and
flexible morals
Haiku # 29117, April 18, 2003 3:50 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
sweet satisfaction
in rolling a tight number
daddy would be proud
Haiku # 29116, April 18, 2003 3:41 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
frowns, the narcissist
in the world here, I'd repent but
so much, trash here from....
Haiku # 29115, April 18, 2003 2:21 pm ET
by Mox of ...waves white flag
hmm, my own website...
people tormenting each one
with cussing, but is
it art, as Gerodias
put his porn along
with naked lunches?
Haiku # 29114, April 18, 2003 2:15 pm ET
by Mox of I'm done smoking "gauloise" but done smoking period
terrified of the
expectations, of the rich
and cultured here, but
well behaved, doesn't
mean scott free into heaven
but quality vibes?
Haiku # 29113, April 18, 2003 2:13 pm ET
by Mox
surrenders..., sharpens
stinger for a later date..try
an IP locator?
Haiku # 29112, April 18, 2003 2:11 pm ET
by Mox
NIPPRESS, NIPPRESS, NIPPRESS,
NIPPRESS, NIPPRESS, NIPPRESS,
BALONEY SAMMICHES,
STANK HO'S
DOMESTIC BEER
THESE ARE THE THINGS OF LIFE
Haiku # 29111, April 18, 2003 2:11 pm ET
by WILLIAM NIPPLERING NIPPRESS of RICHARD LARSON
I think this code thing
would weed me out, and a lot
of fighting would be

nil, nonexistent, dead
but I shall miss it, the rants
but, those rants were sins...
Haiku # 29110, April 18, 2003 2:10 pm ET
by Mox
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