You didn't say please.
Please may I have another.
Just one more haiku.
by Addicted to your glorious verse!
Thank you. You're welcome.
Thank you. You're welcome. Thank you.
You're welcome. Thank you.
by Noticer of Etiquette
Yes, I was abused.
By all five of my uncles.
They made me dress up.
Sometimes a French maid.
Sometimes the Easter Bunny.
Or Adolph Hitler.
They farted on me.
Mom got pics and videos.
And I was famous.
They kept the money.
Wasted it on crack and coke.
Then I ran away.
Became a hobo.
Riding town to town on trains.
And learned to fart back.
I learned from Rufus.
He taught me the ways of farts.
And to blast enemies.
by Would make a great movie, no?
Seriously, Darth
Were you abused as a child?
Your mind is so weird . . .
by Or Maybe Too Much Acid and Demons Entered the Portal of Your Soul
More people should die.
Pre-jet lag insomnia.
Next time ebola.
by Damn it, my balls have lost their odor. of Here, smell my finger; see what you think.
Expensive call girls.
Old politician clients.
Maybe, just maybe.
by Kill two turds with one boner.
On your fast food stand,
Splat goes my contagious phlegm.
Covid with your fries?
by Thinking of ways I can target old ppl. of Any ideas?
A dyslexic girl
sent pics of The Sahara.
I said nudes, not dunes!
by Sahara Sarah. of Hardly dry.
I've nothing to do.
So I will write this haiku.
And send it to you.
by Send Nudes
I think I just read your book
by Noseful of Details
Late night sleepwalker
Stops in at the donut shop
This man is naked
Six honey glazed, please
Impromptu game of ring toss
Exits, still sleeping
by Sticky Erection of Pointing in the direction of home
I'm writing a book.
"How To Teleport Your Farts
To Others' Noses."
by Order Now of While Supplies Last!
Can you beat the RT-PCR covid test by giving yourself a good nasal rinse before hand? I'm thinking I'll use dish soap and bleach. Make sure it's negative.
Negativity.
Nowadays it's a good thing.
Fuck shit Goddamn cunt!
Never mind the test.
See how negative I am?!
Humans are all doomed!
by Or something.
This little piggy.
Old McDonald had a farm.
The wheels on the bus.
by I just want an Egg McMuffin!
I guess I was wrong.
Itchy balls aren't a symptom.
Not of corona.
It's a lot more fun
to spread itchy ball disease
than it is covid.
Know what I mean, Vern?
Time to bathe my schweaty sac.
Would you care to help?
by 1 km^2 scrotal area. of stretch it real good!
Call upon Janis
in times of trouble. Janis
will restore haiku.
by Haiku Revival of 2021
Having covid's great!
Cough all over grocery stores
and shopping mall stands.
Life gets no better.
It's more fun than abortion.
Legalized murder.
by They deserve it. Look what they've done.
Spicy Korean food.
I don't care what meat it is.
It's so freaking good!
by Dogtopus duckat nude noodle soop. of Quack bark meow slither.
I am NOT Janis.
You are certainly not fucked.
You're not even kissed.
by Nobody loves you.
I did one better.
I shat on the neighbor's lawn.
And wiped with his shirt.
by That's what he gets for hanging his laundry to dry.
Every so often
Let out your inner caveman
Go shit in the woods
by Deeppack Snowpra of Embracing a birch tree with my toned arse cheeks
Janis! Janis lives!
Janis will deal with the bots!
Wait... who is Janis?
by If Darth is Janis We Are Fucked
Thank you much, Janis.
We appreciate your work.
And this fun website.
by By "we", yes I do happen to have a turd in my pocket.
I've been smoking crack.
No, that cough isn't covid.
I promise, honey.
You care about AIDS??!!
That is soooo nineteen ninties.
God, how old ARE you??
by Shut up and pass the blunt.
Think I'll go out for
some nasty street meat tonight.
No, not fried chicken.
by 30 dolla make you holla of Me love you long time.
Craziness endures.
It sticks in your memory.
Normality fades.
by Admit it!
I still miss posting
pis of my unwashed backside
via website links.
by Thats why VHS stopped bc he misses my naughty pics.
Doesn't take long to
obliterate craziness
No time for this shit
by Janis
Other than spaces
copy-pasted, I did not
do anything else.
I've been too busy
spreading covid at shopping
malls and airport lounges.
by You're welcome, my beautiful planet! of Shed these pesky humans!
Darth was acting up
He erased the internet
Fucking math genius
by Tattler of Tales
What the actual
FUCK has been going on here?
2 week vacation :-(
by Janis
Moxie contains herbs,
Mystical roots and spices .
It's a brain tonic.
by That's why Mainers are Smarter than Flatlanders
well as russia seems
more interested in spam
on haiku, china???
by mox
The Russian bot-boy
Learned to list endless websites.
Go eat kasha, jerk.
by Cyrillic Imbecilic of Moronic
Little space-bar boy
He learned to hold that key down.
(White space is racist)
by Space-bar Drinks on the House of White Power
Swallowed by a whale
Will Moby Dick shit us out?
This is all your fault
by Anonymous Poet
We will haiku you.
You will get haiku'ed SO hard,
Won't know what hit you.
by Extreme Haiku of Mixed Martial Syllables
A bunch of gay clowns.
Gene Semens can lick it up.
Not even music.
by Anonymous Poet
You watch PBS
Philippines Bird Sex Channel
I've seen your tweets, bro
by Dirty Bird of Seed Spilling Zone
You'll never keep up
with me and my sisters, Darth.
But we think you're hot.
by Kloaca Kardashian of Mansion
Don't you watch Nova?
Big bird has a cloaca
I'm bending over!
by Big Bird of Snuffalupagus' house
If Big Bird's anus
could be seen when he bends down,
I'd watch PBS.
by How 'bout you?
Many other Popes,
in their Glorious Wisdom,
have wanted my Schlong.
by And have it, they did!
If the Pope wants it,
I will send him my Grand Schlong...
But it isn't bald.
by I use Nair!
When I fart, you'll hide
Twerking helps ease out the gas.
Watch my sick moves, dawg
by Dance Party USA alumni of Huffing Hairspray
Philippines hide out
Vatican wants Darth's bald schlong
For reliquary
by Advice of Keep your neck on a swivel
Darth is C.I.A.
He is a secret agent.
Agent of farting.
by Spooked of Covert Flatulence
But do not forget
Her Ethiopian Highness
The Queen of Sheba
by KUSH of PUNT
