It is Christmas time.
Resurrect your childhood.
Stupid ornaments.

I did it again.
It was a terrible thing.
I should not do that.

Mud is beautiful.
Countless possibilities.
Sentient beings.

I hate statistics.
Fuck the null hypothesis.
And its inventor!

Inject air up there.
Flatulent penile blast.
Fun with catheters!

Jesus loves you all.
Now send your donation here:
Salvation dot com

Ringy fucking ding.
The telephone never stops.
I am the best whore.

You know what's awesome?
Put an earthworm up your dick.
Then go fuck a goat.

I like to fuck goats.
Sometimes I'll fuck a chicken.
But goat pussy's best.

You must be aware
The Mandrake wants you for sex
You are a good chef

Mental laxative
Wind rushing through a sick mind
What will be produced

I'm sorry to say
My monkey does not like you
And she never will

My fancy goblet
Runneth over with foul stench
Used it as spittoon

I beg your pardoon.
Your garden smells like dog shit.
Time to flush it down.

Starry Pardoon (Russian: Old Fart).

I beg your pardon
I never promised you a
fucking rose garden

Towards far pee stall.
If you were to smell my poo,
You would lose to stink.

Cowards are ye all
If you were in my canoe
You would choose to sink

I expect welcome
I receive rude apathy
Step up now lurkers

I am so nervous
to post here with such esteemed
poets and artists

Fat Albert man boobs.
A ghetto pearl necklace.
He needed the cash.

I was also raped.
Except that I sold my ass.
Damn Jello pudding.

I sold my soul.
And I also sold my hole.
Butterscotch pudding.

I'll do anything.
Yes, I like Jello that much.
Fat Albert flavor.

Not working is good.
And it's better to be drunk.
All women love me.

It's windy today Greg
Too windy to work with a crane
Better to be unemployed today

Math is hard it sucks
Especially in the tub with my duck
Quack quack quack quack quack

I want to buy crack.
I do not want to smoke it.
It is for my whore.

She's in my basement.
Locked up so she can't run off.
All she needs is crack.

I see you been talking
To yourself for months
All it is is a mirror

Goodbye!

Flig flotten eep doo.
Zshoo fliggest hoomp zog rooboid.
Ambot kaayo.

mxlipk Dingleberry Pie Dot Com xyk382 nglspim Depends Undergarment Fetish xe382b
Here's a good question:
What do old women taste like?
Depends! Ha Ha Ha!

reverse phone lookup free results I am no longer positive kfkeedkgaadd

Scamming Africans!
Nuke Nigeria Today!
Destroy The Scam Spam!

Filthy diseased whore.
Snow white and the seven dwarves.
Black and white dwarf orgy.

Big bang orgasm.
Disney Carl Sagan slut!
Big black gaping hole.

Goddamn fucking shit.
Fuck these fucking puke bag fucks.
Cunt drizzle stench slime.

Goddamn scamming cunts.
Lets rip out their entrails.
Love their expression.

We're scammed high and low.
Obama care and loan scams
There's no difference.

We're squeezed for our cash.
And they never see a court.
I want a fucking revolution and I don't give a shit if this is more than 5 syllables! Fuck 'em! Fuck the thieves and scammers and burn them alive! We need to take back what is ours!

hey petite philae
wave those so distant dendrons
hold on for the ride

I prefer gerbils.
Poodle ass is too loose.
Sometimes I do rats.

What is Haiku,
I think I may have done this wrong,
Does this irritate you

Is it really gay,
If the man you are fucking,
Was once a female

And I fucked her right,
Fuck her right in the pussy,
right in the pussy

Anal with poodle,
SMOOSH SMOOSH SMOOSH SMOOSH SMOOSH SMOOSH SMOOSH,
Gaping poodle ass

Japanese Haiku:
The moon shines brightly.
Moon beams shimmer on the pond.
Hear how the frogs sing.

American translation:
The moon shines brightly.
Frogs are singing at the pond.
Lets go home and fuck.

They say the same thing.
You might miss the subtlety.
Both are about sex.

But then if you're me,
You'd go home and fuck the frog.
Subtlety is dumb.

Iamback's "jelly".
He wants a Star Trek wedding.
Dreams of sucking Kirk

I'd rather be gay
than to be a jugalo.
Bunch of white trash scum.

"W00t w00t!" mating call
for donkey raping crack heads
and chicken fuckers.

ICP butt bong:
Gravity Bong with vodka.
Right up your ass hole.

Instant alcohol.
Straight from sphincter to your brain.
How Iamback drinks.

Boogerhead dot com
Register at go daddy.
The price is so cheap!

I'd rather be gay
than to be a jugalo.
Bunch of white trash scum.

"W00t w00t!" mating call
for donkey raping crack heads
and chicken fuckers.

an eternity
when hands briefly glancing spark
ember burns thrughout
an ember

I financed my loan
by using my erection.
Sperm bank deposit.

so i bought the pills
by using my payday loan
hard on my finance

They don't speak English.
And surely not Japanese.
African scam spam.

For this they get paid $3 per day.
Which is double what they would make elsewhere.
The website owners (scammers) are the ones who need
to be shot through the fucking head.
I guarantee they funnel the money to a Swiss bank.
If you follow these links they are all scam pharmacy or loan links.
Hardon pills are their fave, because who's going to report that they got ripped off when trying to buy viagra online?
I'm surprised these scam websites don't get shut down right away.
The inefficiency of justice.

Maybe you could spam
and still follow the format
That would impress me

Poop Haiku #393

Pooping is great fun.
Think of Barrack Obama.
He's in your toilet.

Fuck Obama-Care!
I'm forced to buy insurance.
Don't need or want it.

If I die, then I die.
Fucking lawyers and doctors.
They get more money.

Shit on Obama.
He lives inside your toilet.
Go buy some Ex-Lax.



(I don't really care about Obama, I just own stock in Ex-Lax. Ha ha ha!)