There was a young man
from Colraine who started to
write haiku in vain.


Word after word, it
was just absurd. He never
wrote haiku again.

Just having a dump...
ng...nng...nnng!..NG..NNG...NNNG!!!.....plop!
Ah, I needed that.

Hitting the sack now.
Flipping hate paradoxes!
But adore quagmires...

Whoops. Absent cable,
No rapid web connection.
Hence, no lame haiku.

DisInfomercials
Plaguing cerebral cortex
Cancel my cable!

the stomach grumbles
it's lunch time, decision time
big mac or whopper?

The bitter wind blows
Marking the winter with cold
Pandas on the march

Cherry Blossom scent,
intoxicating bouquet.
I have shiny shoes.

.....................rorrim eht ni hturT
esnes ekam ylon nac sgniht emoS
.........................noitcelfer nopu

Now I have a fan.
It makes me feel really cool
when words burn brightly.

Pulse accelerates
With visual stimuli
Not love at first sight

Warm fluid exchange
Through epidermal friction
Post-coital bliss

Brilliant use of "arse"
As future tense transitive
Well done M. Chiki

with such good
there is always some rot
pages erased

with such good
there is always such rot
pages erased

Loves fragrant spices
My heart lightly hits the ground
As love is refused

Feel the warmth of my
flatulence against your cheek,
the smell of semen.

This poem's a haiku
because I could not be arsed
to write a fourth line.

A news bulletin:
MLK -- lecher, martyr
Hardly a savior

as serum exudes
my bandage changes colours
like a blood rainbow

Scrotum expansion
Supernumerary ball
Care to juggle them?

Viewed "Oz" on demand
Gratuitous nudity
Bare buttocks galore

Aboard airport tram:
"Open for bombardier phone."
What the fuck is that?

set us up the bong
all your haiku are belong
inertia is strong

Wrinkles of her smile.
Will anyone remember
these respectful lines?

As the counter spins
Over thirty four thousand
Quantity is trump

weird begets bizarre
effervescence that rises
from the inferno

Who has green fingers?
The gardener. But whose are brown?
The uphill gardener.

Soft white bubbles burst
salt upon the tongue licking
the juice of sodom.

and take a big bite
crunch crunch crunch chew chew chew yum!
at leech you taste good

surreal picture
you lying there like a leech
I hold your cold hands

wish i had someone
lovingly peel you off me
and pop you open

my blood oozes out
stains the water bright crimson
colour of your lips

i grimace in pain
you lovingly peel them off
and pop them open

holding your cool hands
i wade through life's murky swamps
leeches suck my blood

I like the cold thanks
But please just take away the
Dreaded hated wet.

knocked over by waves
barnacles deglove my flesh
my blood flows freely

forgot a "k" to anonymous poet. with the 'k', it goes:



exposing ourselves,
with all our bad haiku words,
i like what you think

exposing ourselves,
with all our 'bad haiku' words,
i like what you thin,

throughout my home town,
crow agency, montana,
songs and stories live!

Quality's been good
'round here lately... Remember
This is *bad* haiku

:-)

her brown-eyed tears
appear as i read haiku
that touched a sweet heart

my wife braids my hair,
in shade from this Crow Sun Lodge:
TODAY I SUN DANCE!

gasping for life's breath,
your heart whispers in my ear,
"i'll always love you"

i'll wait on the moon,
staring at the Green Planet
until you return

the living culture
of the Crow Tribe of Indians,
fades from corruption

Unbelievable
Seven degrees and sunny
In January

More Crow Indian Stabs at Haiku


all molded from dirt,
soils and man's colors come
from Mother Earth's womb


rising from repose,
moonlight relflects our pleasure
within your nude eyes


indian children cry
with fear, when drunken parents
start fighting again


on this river's bank,
thoughts of suicide vanish,
when i feel haiku

Kegels are a squeeze
Beagle lying on sofa
One, two, three, four, squeeze!

Tinkle in the stream,
carry my relief down to
campers unaware.